devil's spy- Sun 13 Jul 2008
OMFG i love this story, i cant wait for the next chapter to be out cuz i want to know whats gonna happens to shakkana when she talks with kagome and when she and akina find out that sesshoumaru is their father!!!! ^-^

ahh i cant wait!!

Jasmine- Mon 07 Jul 2008
plz write more

inusesshyj93- Mon 07 Jul 2008
ooo sesshomaru just happen to find his mate and want to meet his pups the day his daughter to decided to give up her virginity, and in the same house he about to enter i feel sorry for taun, this is going to be good, can't wait ,update soon

Kagome357- Mon 30 Jun 2008
Wow...such cruelty. I'm an honest reviewer but I don't think I've ever told a writer her story sucked. Such decorum and how ladylike...the hypocrisy is hilarious. Inside joke, MIP(Sess)...that wasn't directed at you.

Anyhoo hon, yes it's written in english - that goes without saying. However, you can't ask for reviews and then get upset when you get the ones you don't like. Your story was difficult to read because of the errors throughout. You write a story for the masses to enjoy but it's not enjoyable if you can't make yourself understood. This site's upload process presents a lot of problems so that's another problem altogether. You really should consider a beta to help you clean up your story.

Another thing I want to add is I don't know how old you are, but if you've never had sex, don't write about it. It doesn't come off as real. Not every experience is butterflies and the heavens singing but what you wrote was just painful. Not every story has to involve sexual contact to be good.

I hope you take my words into consideration. Take care.

Chrissy- Sun 29 Jun 2008
This is a very good stories. When are you going to finish it?

al- Thu 26 Jun 2008
that's when you add an author's note,telling us this has happened.
for the most part,we'll understand.
Just take your time,and we'll wait.
the site isn't going anywhere.
good luck.

Dark_topaz- Thu 26 Jun 2008
why is only the fist senance showing up

anonnie mouse- Thu 26 Jun 2008
um...chap 4&5 only have one sentence each as far as I can see

Ayame S.- Wed 25 Jun 2008
Hey this is a great story. I can't wait until you updated it again.

Noacat- Wed 25 Jun 2008
Dude. I'm not even going to mitigate my thoughts: this sucked. I hate to be that hard on someone. I really do, but this story needs A LOT of work. The concept itself is worthwhile, if a bit overdone, but you do have a unique perspective. However, you have massive grammar and spelling issues, which are not helped at all by the bad formatting. I could ignore all of that for the love of the fic, because I'm always up for a good dose of angst.

But the single sentence chapters? Lame. A sentence is not a chapter. At all. It shows a startling disregard not only for your readers but for your story itself. Get your writing boots on and give us some real content AND GET YOURSELF A BETA, because right now this is just a hot mess.

Sorry for the tough love, but it had to be done. Take the advice for what it is or ignore it -- throw tomatoes if you wish. I'm just being real with you.

Mevneriel- Mon 23 Jun 2008
your story sounds intresting but seems to be missing. I look forward to reading it once it's up.

Dark_topaz- Mon 23 Jun 2008
where is it

INUYASHA © Rumiko Takahashi/Shogakukan • Yomiuri TV • Sunrise 2000
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