Granted, but due to plumbing problems it's flooded.

I wish mosquitoes would stop biting me.

Granted, but bees make you their target instead.

I wish I could go to Venice with my brother.

Granted, but it is only a twenty minute stop-over due to a mix up with the tickets and you have to go right back home again while your brother sets off on his lovely holiday, promising to send you a postcard!


I wish I had an aquarium full of goldfish in my room.

Granted, you now live in a palace.... that you have to clean all on your own.

I wish I can have a nice tasty pizza to eat right now.

Granted, but a ravenous bunch of friends stop by your house at the same time as the pizza delivery boy. They eat all of your pizza before you can even get one slice.

I wish I had a bird.

Granted! You have a bird - a vulture named Vincent who likes to sit on your shoulder and intimidate every handsome male that throws a glance your way. You get so bothered by this you end up living on a little island waaaay out in the Pacific, just you and Vincent, who is starting to grow on you in a horrible fascinating sort of way.

You pass the days fishing and slicing up your catch for Vincent who hangs on your every word, devotedly never leaving your side. Many years pass and you find one morning dear Vincent has met his demise. You lay him to rest on the grassy knoll he liked best and go there each and every sunset to lay a freshly sliced fish on his resting place, realising that perhaps it was all for the best. For without Vincent you would never have known the peace and tranquility and clean living that the solitary life can bring.

Without Vincent you would have been going out to parties, having sleepovers, eating candy bars while reading in bed, really just running amok at all hours. Life would have been one long celebration filled with hunky guys, delicious but sinful junk food and endlessly burning the candle at both ends until you dropped, exhausted and wrinkled up well before your time.

Aren't you glad you got yourself a bird!


I wish I had the talent to write a really good story.

Christine wrote:
Granted! You have a bird - a vulture named Vincent who likes to sit on your shoulder and intimidate every handsome male that throws a glance your way. You get so bothered by this you end up living on a little island waaaay out in the Pacific, just you and Vincent, who is starting to grow on you in a horrible fascinating sort of way.

You pass the days fishing and slicing up your catch for Vincent who hangs on your every word, devotedly never leaving your side. Many years pass and you find one morning dear Vincent has met his demise. You lay him to rest on the grassy knoll he liked best and go there each and every sunset to lay a freshly sliced fish on his resting place, realising that perhaps it was all for the best. For without Vincent you would never have known the peace and tranquility and clean living that the solitary life can bring.

Without Vincent you would have been going out to parties, having sleepovers, eating candy bars while reading in bed, really just running amok at all hours. Life would have been one long celebration filled with hunky guys, delicious but sinful junk food and endlessly burning the candle at both ends until you dropped, exhausted and wrinkled up well before your time.

Aren't you glad you got yourself a bird!



LMAO!!! Oh my gosh I love it!

Christine wrote:
Granted! You have a bird - a vulture named Vincent who likes to sit on your shoulder and intimidate every handsome male that throws a glance your way. You get so bothered by this you end up living on a little island waaaay out in the Pacific, just you and Vincent, who is starting to grow on you in a horrible fascinating sort of way.

You pass the days fishing and slicing up your catch for Vincent who hangs on your every word, devotedly never leaving your side. Many years pass and you find one morning dear Vincent has met his demise. You lay him to rest on the grassy knoll he liked best and go there each and every sunset to lay a freshly sliced fish on his resting place, realising that perhaps it was all for the best. For without Vincent you would never have known the peace and tranquility and clean living that the solitary life can bring.

Without Vincent you would have been going out to parties, having sleepovers, eating candy bars while reading in bed, really just running amok at all hours. Life would have been one long celebration filled with hunky guys, delicious but sinful junk food and endlessly burning the candle at both ends until you dropped, exhausted and wrinkled up well before your time.

Aren't you glad you got yourself a bird!


I wish I had the talent to write a really good story.

Granted but you end up having horrible writer's block, but once you got through that somehow your computer burnt.

I wish I was a dolphin then I wouldn't have to study Marine Biology.

Granted, but then you are now in captivity for the rest of your life and have to endure being oggled at by screaming kids that bang their fists onto the glass while adults watch you apathetically.

I wish that I could have my bunny back.

koneji wrote:
Granted, but then you are now in captivity for the rest of your life and have to endure being oggled at by screaming kids that bang their fists onto the glass while adults watch you apathetically.

Oddly, I don't think I'd mind that since I could squirt water at those people and get everyone soaked.

Granted your bunny back, but as a zombie plot bunny who naws on your brain every day.

I wish I had more free time.

Granted, you're now stranded on a deserted island with no one there and all the free time in the world... to be bored

I wish some of these fanfictions could be made into anime.

Granted but only your fanfics are popular. They are in such high demand that you are soon being harassed by fans and producers. The stress starts to get to you and you develop writer's block, but still the producers won't leave you alone so you are finally forced to change your name and appearance and go into hiding.

I wish my flower bed would weed itself.

Granted but now instead of your intent for the weeds to disappear, it is now overrun with the weeds that have somehow bred with cacti so they can now go on very little water and painfully repel any attempts to remove them from the ground.

I wish it was warmer again.

Granted, but it's so hot that the electricity stops working and the water always evaporates when you try to get a glass.

I wish I had a decent paying job.

Granted, but two months in the company bankrupts.

I wish my lunch would make itself.

Granted, but.. it would often taste horrible.

I wish Sesshoumaru was my best friend

Granted, but you can never actually talk to him because he just goes hn.

I wish I could go home.

Granted but when you go home you'll see your parents/legal guardians dead by vaporization because people where looking for 2 specific droids.

I wish it would stay warm all of fall semester while I'm in college.

Granted but it always 90 plus and all the air conditioners are broken.

I wish to be able to stop thinking about football and start being able to work on my fic.

Granted but now you incorporate SOCCER in your plot themes.

I wish I had my room to myself again.

granted but I catches on fire and now you have to live in a box.


I wish it was thanksgiving weekend

Granted, but all the good Thanksgiving food was sold out at the stores, and no family could come over due to snow! {or vice versa}

I wish I could live in England *w*

Granted, but global warming makes the seas rise and England is covered by water.

I wish winters in Michigan were warm.

Granted, but it messes with world weather, making countries around the equator have never-ending blizzards.

I wish for amazing pizza