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My Non-Existent Luck by Lilith-sama

Chapter 1.

Light streamed through open windows. The air was fresh with the morning. Outside muggy windows, birds sang lovely tunes only they would know and understand. Small green buds popped from the ends of branches of trees as squirrels scampered to and fro from their homes, searching for acorns and food to eat. The warmth of the day promised good luck.

"Oh my God! I'm so sorry!"

...Perhaps not for everyone.

"Blind, ignorant, ungrateful child!" An angry old woman shrieked, swatting her purse at a defenseless young woman. The girl quickly tried to avoid the purse, but was hit several times before she could completely run away. This had been the fourth person she had run into in a row--and she didn't even know how she ran into them!

"Did that woman carry a load of bricks in that purse of hers?" She winced as she rubbed her swollen back, where the woman had repeatedly abused her. "Ouch. Bruises by nightfall, I bet you." She limped along her way, straying away from other people walking the sidewalks.

Kagome Higurashi was never a fortunate young woman. Her life had been filled with unfortunate events, clumsy falls, and failed achievements. She tried her damnest to make her life worth something, but sometimes that was even hard to do.

She quickly straightened her sore back as she entered the local bookstore she helped run. Kagome was met by friendly, smiling faces as she entered behind the counter...after the swinging hard oak door had effectively shattered her kneecaps.

"Ouch!" She whispered softly, ignoring the pain in her legs.

"You really should watch that thing." A woman with brown hair mentioned simply. Kagome glanced upwards, frowning at the familiar woman. Her store partner.

"Sango, you all ready know everything is out to get me. It should be looking out for me! I shouldn't be looking out for it!" Kagome stared at the door for a few moments, hoping her glare would perhaps set the heavy door aflame. She grimaced at the thought.

It'd probably set me aflame, she thought, rather angrily at that.

"Your life sucks." Sango said simply, flipping through her recent book orders. Kagome scowled at her.

"You state the obvious! I go through this same hell each and every day--give me some spine for that! But, otherwise, yes, my life does suck. And I thank you every day for reminding me!" Sango giggled as she flipped her magazine.

"I know. You're welcome." Kagome sighed as she slipped off her coat.

"And, I hope you know..." She began, pointing a dainty finger in the air as she sat her coat in the corner of the little area known as her office. "I'm not always jinxed! I have my absolutely wonderful days. And then I have..." She began to pull off her sweater. "...then I have the worst days of my life!" Sango watched, in amusement, as Kagome gasped as she felt a soft breeze on her stomach. The two were silent for an awkward silence. "...I'm flashing everyone in this store...tell me it's a dream or I might, in some possible way, be lying to myself." Sango helped Kagome pull down her shirt before taking off her sweater.

"Sorry, deary. Hey, did you buy that at the local lingerie store? I think I saw a blue shade of that on sale." Kagome scowled at Sango's teasing before sitting down in a chair by the cash register.

"I'm just lying to myself. My life is absolute shit!" Sango gave a sympathetic nod as she watched Kagome bury herself in her long raven hair.

"Kagsy, it'll pick up one day or another. When you were in high school you were the luckiest girl there! Remember those times?" Kagome rocked herself back and forth in self-agony. Sango sighed. "What happened on the way here?"

"I ran into three people, stepped in a mud puddle, got beaten by an old woman who carries a 100 pound purse, and flashed this shop." Kagome leaned backwards on the chair, minding her back. "I guess I've had worse." Sango nodded in agreement as she bent down to move the hair out of Kagome's eyes.

"You should really doll yourself up more, Kagsy-dear. You have a lovely face." Kagome frowned. "You could attract some real lookers with those pretty blue eyes of yours, huh?"

"No one would find a walking disaster attractive." She mumbled as she drew her hair back over her eyes. "Now leave me to wallow. I'll be okie-dokie in five minutes. Trust me." Sango nodded, patted her poor friend on the head, and left to stock some shelves. The last time Kagome tried to stock the high shelves, she had given herself a concussion.

Sango sighed. She truly did feel horrible for her friend. Kagome truly was a beautiful person--she had the most gorgeous eyes, the silkiest hair, and the nicest voice. But Kagome didn't seem to understand that. She drowned herself in her hair, wore no make up, and avoided much eye contact. Sango knew she didn't want to spread the horrible luck in her life, but completely isolating herself from the world would destroy her completely.

Sango felt a nice grope on her rear. Sighing again, she glanced down to see the perverted assistant she had hired months ago. To put it short, he bugged the hell out of her. Any breast he groped in sight, and his ass groping skills even surpassed his attack on any woman's breasts. She had given him sexual assault classes one too many times but he never learned a thing. She had given up...and, instead of firing him, she had kept him on her force. She couldn't say why. Perhaps the pervert had grown on her.

"Miroku, release my ass right now or prepare for intense consequences." The dark haired man smiled innocently and backed away in a stack of books. He knocked them over, making Sango groan. She was in way too over her head.

"Oh my God! I'm spreading!" Kagome cried, rushing to the noise. "Miroku, keep five feet away from me! I think I affected you." Miroku frowned as he looked at the books.

"I don't think that was you, Kagsy. That was just my clumsiness. Trust me, you're not contagious. If you were, I'd be out of this room in a heart beat." Kagome sighed in relief as she leaned back against the book shelf. Miroku watched, in no surprise, as she missed the shelf completely and crumpled to the floor.

"Bruises, cuts, and broken bones, oh my!" Kagome called sarcastically as she heard the ding of the door of the book shop. She remained on the floor for a few moments before she saw a pair of feet in front of her vision.

"Why, hello, good Madam." Kagome greeted as she saw the face of a young girl, about ten or so. "How are you this fine morning?" The girl smiled.

"Just fine. And, if it isn't too rude to ask, why are you on the floor?" Kagome raised an eyebrow at the girl, noting the proper language she spoke. And she spoke rather elegantly too. Her voice was soft and wispy; one that had once promised a young rambunctious child. It seemed that the little girl had been pushed to grow up over her years.

"I believe you might be the most articulate little girl I've met in my entire life." Kagome informed her as she leaned up. "And I'm down here to prove gravity still exists." Kagome rubbed her back, her sore, sore back, before standing up. "You know, you look familiar. Have you been here before?" The girl nodded politely. Kagome watched the little side ponytail bob on top of her brown head.

"I like this shop. I come once or twice every two weeks or so. Novellas are my favorite type of book, but they seem to run out quickly." The girl smiled brightly. "I just need to find another!"

"I'm Kagome." Kagome greeted, sticking out her hand. The girl was about to shake it, but Kagome pulled away before she could, flexing her fingers. "Sorry about that, I just don't like to spread."

"Germs, right?" The girl asked, watching Kagome. Kagome shook her head.

"No. I spread bad luck." Kagome watched as the girl giggled for a few seconds before regaining her breath.

"I'm Rin Taisho. It's nice to meet you, no-luck Kagome." Kagome snorted at the little girl as she walked over to the desk.

"I fancy the little nickname you've bestowed upon me. Now, little Rinny-Rin, tell me what you're interested in." Kagome laughed prettily. "Never knew I could rhyme."

"Where exactly is your fantasy section?" Rin asked, looking up at Kagome. Kagome placed a finger on her bottom lip in thought. Rin soon mimicked her, trying to see if it drew out an affect.

"Well..." Kagome bit her cheek. "It's over in the far left hand corner, after the Sci-Fi. And this finger on lip is a habit of mine from childhood. It might jinx you even if you do it. Put the finger down, Rin-dear. I don't want to give such a nice person the Kagome disease." Rin watched Kagome carefully push open the oak door to behind the desk and close it again.

"What's the Kagome disease?" Kagome was about to explain fully on her unlucky fate in the stars, but Sango passed her by to answer.

"Kagome believes in superstitions. Her bad luck disease is something she can't get her mind off of. She believes almost everything is out to get her...her body included. She trips over anything and everything." Sango sighed as she shut a book. "It's all in her head."

"No, it's not." Kagome said calmly. "And I've discussed this with you many, many times before. I'm jinxed. End of story. That's it! Boom! Bam! Done!"

"You haven't always been jinxed, have you?" Rin asked, leaning against the desk. "Besides, you don't seem that jinxed to me." Kagome laughed bitterly.

"Oh, my dear little fiend, I am that jinxed! I've been jinxed ever since high school! Today I have effectively gotten beaten by a woman in her nineties and flashed this shop while taking off my sweater!" She stopped as she heard a loud THUD by the shelves.

"You...flashed...the store?" Miroku asked, his voice shaky. "Why didn't you tell me? And why, Gods, did you not let me see Kagome's round, beautiful mounds of--" Sango pressed her dirty sneaker on the back of his head and pushed his nose into the ground.

"Piss off, lecher, before I send you off to a proper class of sexual assault and get restraining orders from the law!" Rin watched the angry woman press Miroku's face further into the navy carpet, before looking at Kagome.

"If I were you, Kagome, I'd be happy." Rin sighed. "At least being amusing is better than being the invisible person two rows across in your Biology class." Kagome shook her head.

"No, it's not really that great. I'd rather be silent than have all this crap happen to me every day. At first I just thought, Wow, this is just a bad day. It'll go by fast! But it wasn't. Since my junior year in high school, I've always been a klutz." Rin frowned a bit as she cocked her head to the side.

"Junior year? That's a peculiar year to begin a streak of clumsiness." Kagome nodded.

"Yeah. I'll always remember that day. You see..." Kagome drawled for a moment as her eyes then flashed. "Wait, Rin, why am I discussing my past? Weren't you here to get a book?" The girl blushed sheepishly as she pulled away from the counter.

"Um...I guess I was...but, Kagome-chan, I kind of like talking to you. It's better talking to someone than no one, right?" Kagome sighed as she motioned for Rin to come through the oak door as a few people began to shuffle their way into the store, searching through the leafy pages of paperback books. The girl excitedly came behind as Kagome pulled up another chair behind the cashier table. "I expect you to tell me a few things too once I'm finished with my story."

"Of course!" Rin chirped excitedly. Kagome smiled. Gods, she had such a soft spot for kids.

"First I must point out something not everyone knows: I wasn't always jinxed. That's why I think I caught a disease. You see, I was a normal kid, popular even. And I had recently fallen for this senior...I can't recall a name, and I scarcely remember what he looked like, but I was in love." Rin looked at Kagome skeptically.

"Love? You can't remember the guy's face!"

"True. But I did believe, at that time, that he was my perfect match. So I tried so hard to befriend him. It was difficult, but a month later he asked me on a date. And, me being young and boy-crazy, I took up his offer." Kagome sighed. "It was my first date. Best date of my life, in fact. He was absolutely gorgeous, even if I can't remember what he looked like. We did every perfect first date thing--we ate our meal in a field of flowers, and he took me dancing. He even watched the sun set with me."

"That's nice." Rin said with a sigh as Kagome fell silent. "Continue, please."

"That actually was the best date in my life...when we watched the sun set, he kissed me. I mean he really kissed me. And then, after he took me home, he said something sweet in my ear and left. The next day I woke up, I tripped over my lamp cord and got a massive splinter in my elbow. And my bad luck started from there!" Kagome shrugged simply as she leaned back in her chair. "The end."

"Did you still date that guy?" Kagome shook her head.

"He never came back to school. And I have no clue still, to this day, why he left." She heard Sango's teasingly sorry sigh.

"Poor Kagsy. For your next story, could you please manage to place in the phrase 'Woe is me!' repeatedly? You seem the sort of raconteur to reflect on stories of self pity." Kagome scowled at her friend, threw a 1 yen piece she picked up from yen tip jar at the desk at her, and stuck out her tongue. "One yen! I'm the luckiest girl alive!"

"So you are!" Miroku observed as he bended down to look up Sango's skirt, whom was stocking a higher shelf. "And you seem to have the sexiest as--" The yen piece landed in the middle of his forehead at a harsh speed, and refused to drop from Miroku's now yen engraved forehead.

"Stuff it!" Sango cried softly, avoiding the angry glare she had gotten from a customer.

"Hey, Kagome, why do you have a tip jar? This is a bookstore." Rin observed, taking the plastic bin to observe it. The paper was peeling away from the peanut jar, where a notebook piece of paper was taped onto it. Red sloppy marker wrote TIPS.

"I dunno. Someone once gave us a tip, so we decided to see if we could make extra cash. Once in a while we get an idiot who is willing to pay money to one in need of it. That is why, dear Rinny-Rin, we have a tip jar!" Kagome explained, smiling at her friends over in the corner having another scrabble of sorts.

"Interesting." Rin observed, smiling as she did so. Kagome nodded.

"So, sweet child whom is visiting the walking tornado of clumsiness, do you live around her?" Rin shook her head at Kagome's question. "Where do you, then?"

"I live ten or fifteen minutes from here. My school is located near a campus of some college...after school I come over here because my dad's company is blocks down with the rest of the really tall buildings." Kagome raised an eyebrow.

"That's nice. Visiting your daddy after school!" Rin narrowed her eyes at Kagome's teasing, but chose to ignore it.

"It's all right. My dad doesn't have time to see me, anyway, so I hope to find sometime in his schedule to spend time with him. Sometimes I'm lucky, other times I'm stuck in his secretary's office playing sudoku." Rin frowned. "His secretary is flimsy."

Kagome watched Sango storm over and lean against the wooden desk that cashier sat on.

"How so?" Kagome asked.

"...I'd hate to be impolite towards one of my dad's employees, but..." Rin coughed. "I wouldn't be surprised if she leads a double life as a pole dancer at the local strip club named Nancy." Kagome and Sango stared at Rin for a moment, making the girl blush. "Seventh graders do this to you."

"Kid, you aren't a seventh grader!" Sango cried. "You have to be ten or around there." Rin nodded with a smile.

"I skipped two grades. So I'm a ten year old in seventh grade, big deal. The academics aren't exactly tough..." Rin sighed. "It's just hard having no one to talk to."

"Talk to us." Kagome said with a brilliant smile. "I don't mind talking to a genius ten year old! Hey, I'm twenty-four, so what? I think we can be perfect friends. You can visit us whenever your dad is being ignorant of your needs. Okay?" Rin nodded excitedly.

"That's great, Kagome! I can come in any time?" Kagome nodded, winking at her.

"Yeah. Just be sure to not cross any black cats across your path and we'll be set friends straight away!" Sango snorted at Kagome.

"You and your superstitions! You are ridiculous." Kagome pouted at her.

"Sure, sure. I'm superstitious, but I'm also jinxed. One thing leads to another, Sango. You must be aware of your surrounds, and if you can avoid bad luck, you must do so." Sango frowned.

"Your logic really, really pisses me off." Kagome grinned, giving her a fake salute from her forehead.

"Aye-aye, Captain! But it seems you are the only one who gets pissed off with my jinxed up life. Miroku doesn't mind my superstitions! Do you, Miroku?" He turned, smiled, and opened his mouth. Sango's harsh glare made him slowly close the mouth he once opened to give an answer.

"I dare not say, my dear Kagome. I dare not say."

"You hurt me so, Miroku." Kagome playfully clutched her heart. "Betrayed! I'm betrayed by the lot of you. And, so help me God, I will show you that I am jinxed!" Kagome cried, pointing at Sango. She rolled her brown eyes and shrugged Kagome off.

"It seems that guy that you went out with stole your luck." Kagome froze for a moment as she turned to the girl sitting in the chair.

"What?"

Rin sighed. "He stole your luck. It's simple, isn't it? You spent a good night together, and then he left you the next day! Your luck was stolen." Kagome frowned.

"I don't think it could have been. He wasn't unlucky at all...perhaps we just rubbed the wrong way and wanted to be away from me the rest of his life?" She joked. Rin shook her head.

"No, I don't think so." She thought for a few moments before looking at Kagome. "Maybe you just have to meet him again?" Kagome stomped her foot in anger.

"You are SO right!" She cried, upsetting a few people in the store. "That is what I have to do. I have to find the guy and then somehow get my luck back!" Sango groaned as she placed her arms around Kagome's shoulders.

"Kagome, honey, you're getting ridiculous here! Let it go. I would rather you resort in ranting about superstitions than have you hung up over some guy you met in your junior year of high school." Sango sighed as she rested her chin on Kagome's shoulder. "Please, Kagsy dear, leave my nerves be. I don't want you stalking a man you can't even remember the name of. And you can't remember what he looks like either! You have a one out of a million chance to find him." Kagome nodded sadly as Sango released her arms.

"You're right." Kagome sighed sadly as she took a customer, the one who had been glaring at her earlier. She began to punch the numbers into the cashier when she gasped. "Sango, I have a year book!"

"No you don't."

"..." Kagome frowned as she dropped the book into a plastic bag and handed it to the customer. He walked out in a huff and neither bothered to give her a good bye nor a small tip. "Damn."

"Well, we could do research!" Rin chirped. "I can help you! I always see nosy pop ups about finding people in your class when I'm surfing the internet. Maybe we could do one of those?" Kagome smiled before Sango gave her a heavy glare.

"Kagome, no."

"Please?" Kagome begged. "I won't break anything anymore if I find him! And I'll be able to cross the street without having the fear of being randomly run over by a motorcycle!"

"And she won't flash the shop anymore!" Rin said, giving a helpful smile. Kagome patted her head and turned to Sango.

"NO!" Miroku cried loudly, following another crash. It was ignored, as always.

"Yeah! I won't embarrass the hell out of you anymore!" Kagome cried. Sango thought for a moment before flipping through the order book binder she had been looking through previous.

"Somehow, Kagome, you'd still be an embarrassment to me." Kagome frowned at that, but let it slide. Sango's jabs at her self esteem were nothing to be dealt with. "But..." Sango began. "You would stop pitying yourself..." She sighed. "I won't help you. Do whatever you want. I just don't want my store partner being arrested and given a restraining order." Kagome grinned widely as she pounced on her friend, squeezing the air out of her lungs in a mega super bear hug.

"Sango!" Kagome squealed. "You are the best friend I've ever had in my life! My luck will turn to the better! No more cloud will rain on my parade!" Kagome proceeded in dancing in a circle, squealing to her fullest. "Luck! Luck! Luck! Give me a dose of good old lucky luck!"

Before Kagome could scream another loud "LUCK!" her foot hooked around an invisible force and she fell to the ground. She groaned. "My face has rug burn!" She cried, moaning at the pain in her nose.

"You are the first person I've meet to trip over air. Congratulations." Sango said sarcastically. Kagome moaned.

"Ouchy..."

******

I got this idea after watching Just My Luck. Horrible movie, really, but the idea has promise. And I think this is a rather humorous bit, and I think I'll continue. I have a rather bad habit for picking up stories and leaving them off, so if you really, really want me to continue with this, review. And I might just continue out of my own pleasure. It just depends on my mood.

If I have any spelling mistakes, please tell me. I like grammar to be right, but I'm human. I make mistakes. Maybe you can help me?

Don't own characters. How I wish I did.

...God, I love The Office.

INUYASHA © Rumiko Takahashi/Shogakukan • Yomiuri TV • Sunrise 2000
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