When all I want is You by alwaysAfan
When all I want is You
She was running. Running away from everything. Running away from the things she care about, and the people who she cared for. Running away desperately from the two people she has being hoping not to be together. Running away from the couple she saw embracing passionately near the lake.
...Running away from Inuyasha and Kikyo...
Kagome stopped running as she realised how far she have ran and that neither Inuyasha nor Kikyo noticed her witnessing their passionate scene. Kagome choked as tears start streaming down her pale face as the thought hit her. Maybe even if the passionate two noticed she was there and running away not long later, probably Inuyasha would not chase after her, but continuing embracing Kikyo...
The thought hit her hard in the heart. Kneeling down, Kagome curled up into a ball and continued crying, this time harder and louder than before.
~Inuyasha...I love you and I thought you love me...but I guess I was wrong~ As Kagome cry her heart out, alone, in the woods, the bush on her left side started rustling, announcing to Kagome to stop crying for there is someone or something near by.
As the bush continue rustling, Kagome decided to stop crying and stood up quickly and silently. She slowly took a few steps backward, in hoping to create some distance. The rustling of the bush was growing louder and louder, as Kagome's heartbeat mimics.
Kagome was so concentrating on the moving bush and walking backward, she did not realise the strong youkai behind her until it was too late.
"I would not advise you to continue playing hide and seek" the powerful youkai voiced out from behind Kagome, making her jump in surprise.
Kagome quickly turned around and after taking a few steps away from the direction she was heading a minute ago, Kagome lift her face to the owner of the voice, only to gasped in surprise.
"Se-Sesshouma-maru?!" Kagome spelled out as she quickly create more distance from the youkai lord.
To her surprise, Sesshoumaru just stood there and stare at her. He did not move forward, nor did he seem to be angered or scary like the times she saw him before. Of course, Inuyasha is not here to fight him, but only Kagome herself, a weak miko who was crying desperately not long ago.
"Inuyasha is not with me, Sesshoumaru" Kagome reasoned out, hoping to get the emotionless lord to move, or to speak, at least.
To her relief, Sesshoumaru started moving. He walked a little backward, until he reached a big tree that seem to be comfortable to sit under, and made him at home.
Sesshoumaru's simple movements calms Kagome in a mysterious way. She mentally blushed as Kagome realised that under that very same tree was the tree that she was crying under not long ago, and now Sesshoumaru is sitting right at the place she was crying. To put it simple, Kagome was embarrassed for a reason that did not need to be noticed.
Sesshoumaru look at Kagome and the empty space besides him. Kagome understands his action. He was calling her to sit besides him, such thoughts made Kagome uneasy. After all, he is Inuyasha's brother and enemy. Wouldn't be wrong for Kagome to sit next to the brother Inuyasha loathe? However, as Kagome's mind flashback to the scene before, anger flared. Why should she, who has done nothing in the world to make Inuyasha sad, consider how Inuyasha feels when he embraced Kikyo and hurt her so deeply that she thought she would rather die than to experience such pain.
Kagome stepped forward and sat down. Because Kagome still feel uneasy and somewhat quite frighten, Kagome decided to sit a little farther away from the spot Sesshoumaru pointed out for her a moment ago.
Silence.
It was nerve-wrecking for Kagome and she decided to start a conversation, but no matter how hard she try, Kagome cannot seem to find something to talk about. Kagome could jump in joy and thank Sesshoumaru for breaking the silence, but Kagome command herself to calm down as what Sesshoumaru said surprise Kagome.
"Rin" Sesshoumaru called out. "Come out" he continued in a stern voice that makes Kagome's stomach flip.
The bush Kagome was so concentrating on before, rustled again. A little girl came out of the bush and started running towards Sesshoumaru and herself with both her hands spread out and a big smile pasted on her bright face.
"Sesshoumaru-sama, Sesshoumaru-sama" the little girl sang out.
As the little girl reached the tree Kagome and Sesshoumaru has been sitting under, Kagome take the time to view the little smiling girl. If she remembers correctly, Kagome had seen this girl before. It was the last time Jaken tried to steal Tetsusaiga near the hot springs. The girl had called out Jaken's name and went away with him. At that time, Kagome had wondered why was a young human girl together with Jaken. Now Kagome think about it, why is a young human girl together with Sesshoumaru
"...Rin was waiting for Sesshoumaru-sama to find Rin"
Ah, so the little girl's name is Rin. Kagome smiled at the scene in front to her. It is hard to believe that not long ago she was somewhat frighten of the lord who is listening to Rin intently. Though Kagome understand that she is still in a dangerous position, Kagome can't help but to answer Rin when Rin asked for Kagome's name.
"My name is Kagome, Rin-chan" Kagome said cheerfully.
Rin turned fully towards Kagome and smiles. Rin talked about herself. Kagome learned that Rin would always wonder around and look for flowers for her Sesshoumaru-sama. When Kagome asked Rin how she ends up being with Sesshoumaru, Rin paused and look at Sesshoumaru, who look at Rin also and quickly turn away. Kagome realise that Rin would not tell anyone about that until Sesshoumaru allows her or he say so himself.
Before Kagome know it, the afternoon sun dwell behind the mountains and the moonlight lit up around the forest. Rin had started yawning not long ago, but since the little girl insists on continue talking and that she is not sleepy at all, Kagome had continued their cheery conversation. That is, until Rin cannot handle it no more and closed her eyes and sleep.
Before long, another silence crept up on the two. Kagome decided that since Sesshoumaru started a conversation before, it is now her turn. Taking a breath in, Kagome started talking. The first thing that came into Kagome's mind was about Rin. She asked how Rin had end up with him, and how, since he loathe humans, did Sesshoumaru end up allowing little Rin to stay besides him.
"Her village was attacked by wolves." Sesshoumaru started, which surprise Kagome.
One thing, she did not expect Sesshoumaru to answer her question. Another, was the news that little Rin's village was attacked. It pained Kagome to know that Rin experienced such a sad life, yet it touched Kagome to see how Rin could smile cheerfully. Pain, depression, touched, heart aching, happy and exciting. As Sesshoumaru continued with his story, all these emotions, one by one, visited Kagome.
Sesshoumaru was intrigued by Kagome. As he told the story of how he met Rin, he felt many emotions appear then disappear from the girl. In such a short time, he can witness a human with so many emotions. Seeing Kagome mixed emotions, it made Sesshoumaru wanting to tell her more and more. Sesshoumaru feel that he is getting out of usual character and that he should resume to showing his emotionless façade, but he cannot stop the urge to continue. As Sesshoumaru came to the part where he mentioned that Naraku kidnapped Rin, Kagome's emotion reached to anger. He told her how Naraku planned for him to team up with the devious hanyou, and how he, Sesshoumaru turn down the offer and got Rin back with him. Kagome's emotions turned to joy.
"I will not forgive Naraku. He had thought that I, Sesshoumaru, lord of the western land, was weak enough to follow his orders. His wrong move was to underestimate me," Sesshoumaru said.
Kagome smiled. "You will also not forgive him because he kidnapped Rin" Kagome stated out.
Sesshoumaru shot a look in Kagome's direction. "Do not get me wrong, woman, I am not angered because Naraku kidnapped Rin. I am not weak, I am also not someone who will allow myself to be caught up by a little girl and allow my enemy to think I have a weakness"
"Say all you want, Sesshoumaru, but no matter what you say, I know you care for Rin" Kagome fight back, determine to make Sesshoumaru see how much he care for the little girl he saved and came to care for.
Sesshoumaru know that Kagome is right and that, not long ago, he had came to care for Rin as if a protective father care for his young daughter. It was weird, Sesshoumaru have been trying so hard to deny the fact that he care for a human child, and that he have created a weakness for others to see, but why is it now that he allow himself to admit these feelings. Sesshoumaru realise it was due to Kagome, and that by being with this girl, he feel like only the two of them are the one in the world and that nothing matters. Such a weird feeling.
Determined to change the topic, Sesshoumaru glaze up at the moon and asked Kagome why she was crying before.
"Crying?" Kagome blinked at Sesshoumaru in surprise. Did Sesshoumaru saw her crying before? A blush crept up onto Kagome's face, as she feels embarrassed.
"Yes. You were crying" Came Sesshoumaru simple reply.
"Oh, I guess you saw it then. You saw me crying"
"I saw you crying, I heard your sobs and I smelt you salty tears"
"Oh, I guess you really know I cried then"
Kagome felt a sharp pain. Should I tell him? Should I ignore his question? Kagome's mind start debating on the decision. It was a relief when Sesshoumaru told her that he is not forcing her and that she is to do what she feels is right. Hearing Sesshoumaru said this, Kagome feel upset and before she could stop herself, she started pouring everything she thought she would keep inside forever.
Kagome started from the beginning. The time when she fell into the bone-eater's well and was transported back in time into the Edo era. How she discovered Inuyasha being pinned on the tree and how she freed him for him to save her from the centipede-youkai. How the Shikon No Tama ended up into piece and how she and Inuyasha must go onto a journey to collect the Shikon No Tama to prevent disruption. Kagome explained Inuyasha's relationship became Kikyo, and how Kikyo was brought back to life due to a piece of Kagome's soul. How Shippo, Miroku and Sango end up in the group. Moreover, how Naraku appeared and became everyone's enemy.
Sesshoumaru listened intently to Kagome's intriguing story. He is amazed at first to hear that Kagome came from the future, but he soon recovered. When Kagome got to the part where the Shikon No Tama end up in pieces and is everywhere, Sesshoumaru noticed Kagome frowned. She was blaming herself for the Shikon No Tama. When Kagome reached to the relationship between his brother and the death miko, Kagome's guilt turned into depression. Sesshoumaru have always known how Kagome feel towards his pathetic brother, and he also under stands that his brother is taking Kagome for granted. Kagome's depression turned into excitement when she started talking about her friends appearance how she enjoy the fun times with them.
Kagome ended up spilling everything. She was very grateful to see that Sesshoumaru was listened intently and never complained how her story seem boring, he never interrupted her when she almost started crying when she started talking about this morning incident.
"Inuyasha said he was going to check how things are up ahead. Everyone was tired so I wanted to freshen them up. I went ahead to look for a waterfall or something similar. But when I found a lake, I also found myself looking at a scene that I do not ever want to see" Kagome could feel that the tears are fighting to pour out, as she tried to continue, Kagome find that it is impossible to hold in the tears. She started crying to her heart's content. "Inuyasha was there, hugging Kikyo. Before I know it, I hid behind the bushes. I guess I felt like a third wheel and so I thought that it is wrong to interrupt them. Like a coward, I ran. The camping site is quite far away from her. I ran like I never ran before. I didn't know the reason for my running away, I guess because Inuyasha seem to have chosen Kikyo and not me."
Sesshoumaru could understand why Kagome was crying. Though he cannot say that he totally understand since he have not experienced these things before, but the way the young girl told her story between sobs, made Sesshoumaru loathe his brother more and more. His brother, who he knows as a fool before, seems to be more fool than he thought. Choosing a dead miko who has, been dead for 50 years and who smell like rotten earth, over a young girl who smiles so happily when talked to Rin, and who is so understanding and caring. His bother is a fool. Such a fool.
"Thanks, Sesshoumaru" Kagome said, interrupting Sesshoumaru's thoughts. Her tears have finally lessened, which made Sesshoumaru almost smile. When Sesshoumaru asked for the reason why she thanked him, Kagome smiled and said, between faint sobs, "because not only you listened to my story without a fuss, you also have not interrupted me- not even once! Therefore, Thank you"
~Thank You~ Sesshoumaru repeat inside his mind, as if the words are new to him. No one has ever thanked him before, except Rin who he saved from death. Except, unlike when Rin thanked him, Kagome's thank filled his body with desire. He has never felt such a feeling before.
Why am I feeling this way? Was what Sesshoumaru wanted to ask himself, but the only answer he would always come up is that he have fallen for this miko girl name Kagome. It is impossible, and Sesshoumaru knows it. Nevertheless, why is he feeling a desire to hold this girl, or to be held by her? Before Sesshoumaru realise what he was doing, using his youkai speed, he positioned himself right in front of Kagome.
Kagome was shocked to see Sesshoumaru moving closer to her, but she was more shock to feel his lips on hers. At first, she protested and tried to push him back, but then her body give way and before she know it, or understand why, she kissed him back.
When Sesshoumaru felt Kagome kissing back, Sesshoumaru was appalled and joyful. Quickly, he positioned one of his hand on he slim hip, and the other one touching her hair. Such passion, such desire! He never knew such feeling existed.
When the kiss ended, Kagome realised what she have done and tried to escape, but Sesshoumaru's hold on her tightened.
"It seem that, before I knew it, I am in love with you" Sesshoumaru said, his eyes locked with hers. "I would like to deny such fact for these feelings would only allow myself to have more weakness, however, I desire you so much I would like it no other way but to have you with me from now on. I promise, never will I make you cry like my brother did to you"
Kagome was shocked to hear Sesshoumaru said what he said. It was a surprise enough for the day to see that Sesshoumaru is caring for a 7 years old child like a real daughter, or the fact that he listened to her story intently, or that he kissed her and she kissed back, but having Sesshoumaru confessing that he loves her is not what she expect. Maybe if have given her more time to let the information in or...no, even if Sesshoumaru have given her a week, no, a month, no, a year, or maybe even a decade, she do not believe time would make a difference to how shock she is.
"Please" Kagome started, "Please, let go of me...let me return to my friends"
"I will not. In my whole life, no one has ever made my heart desire for another like you easily did to mine. I love you, Kagome..."
As Sesshoumaru started leaning forward for another kiss, Kagome cried, tears steaming down her face. "Please...Sesshoumaru, please, let me go"
Sesshoumaru stopped, for a second he felt like his heart has stopped as well. He has promised to not make her cry, yet here she is, crying. Sesshoumaru wanted to scream, but instead, he let go of the woman he has fallen for. Though him and his heart are feeling so much pain, Sesshoumaru's expressionless mask was pasted to Sesshoumaru face. "Go." Sesshoumaru commanded, turning around as if he cannot bear to see Kagome crying and leaving him.
Kagome tears would not stop pouring and when she saw Sesshoumaru turning around, her heart gave out a sharp pain. 'Go' he said to her, which only made her tears pour out more. This would never work out. She and Sesshoumaru are too different. Yes, different. It pains Kagome to think all these, but it is true. She and Sesshoumaru are too different to be able to love each other. Kagome whispered something under the moonlight and turned round and head back to camp.
Sesshoumaru heard Kagome's last words before she turned round and headed back. 'I'm sorry' is what he heard, and if Kagome stayed a little longer, she would see that Sesshoumaru has turned around, on his face, a single tear escaped...
"Kagome-chan!!" Sango cried out as she hugged her friend who has just returned when the team was in a fixture of worries. "We were so worried!!" Sango exclaimed.
"KAGOME!!" Shippo cried out as he caught up with Sango and hugged Kagome's legs. "WHERE WERE YOU, I MISSED YOU SO SO SO SO SO SO SO SO MUCH!!!!"
Miroku smiled at Kagome and Kagome smiled back with a nod as greeting.
"It's good to be back," Kagome said, looking around.
"Inuyasha is out looking for you" Miroku explained when he noticed Kagome's wandering eyes. He has also noticed that Kagome's eyes look like she have been crying all day yesterday, but since Kagome seem to not like to talk about it, Miroku decided to keep his mouth shut.
Everything is back to normal. Kagome thought. It was not long later that Inuyasha returned to camp. When he saw Kagome, Inuyasha seem to be surprise but he only mumbled 'welcome back' and walked away. Everyone, even Shippo, see that something is weird since the usual Inuyasha would shout at Kagome, saying things like 'Kagome! Where were you! Why have you been playing around when we need you to detect Shikon No Tama. Do your job right.' Alternatively, when he is in a good mood, he would say something like 'everyone was worried. Where did you go? Are you hurt?'
It was not long later that the afternoon sun turned in and allows the moon to visit. Inuyasha was moody as ever. When Kagome and Sango found a hot spring near by and decided to go, Inuyasha snapped.
"Is that all you can think about?!" he roared. " Always, ALWAYS! You always waste time, Kagome! Do you even care that the Shikon No Tama is being collected by that Naraku as well?!"
Everyone was shocked by Inuyasha's uproar. Sango, who can see that her best friend is offended, stood her grounds. "Inuyasha, I am going to the hot springs as well, why are you venting your anger on poor Kagome? You Moron!"
Shippo soon chipped in, "Inuyasha baka baka baka baka baka baka baka"
Miroku also could not stand the way Inuyasha is acting, and so said, "Since morning you have been acting weird, Inuyasha" Miroku stated.
"Why do you all make it seem like it is my fault?" Inuyasha shouted back at the group, "I am not the one who reeks with the smell of my brother!"
Everyone except Inuyasha froze.
At that moment, Kagome decided to stood her grounds. "Inuyasha, I am not the one who embraced Kikyo yesterday morning"
Again, everyone froze, this time instead of Kagome, it is Inuyasha who froze.
"How did yo-" Inuyasha tried to asked, but only got interrupted by Sango.
"What is going on? I don't understand what the two of you are saying!" Sango shouted, in hope for an explanation.
Kagome understand perfectly well that her friends deserve to know what is going on, and that though she do not wish to explain, Kagome cannot help but to turn to her friends and started her short explanation, "Yesterday morning, Inuyasha was at the lake near by with Kikyo. I saw it happened and ran away. Not long later, I ran into Sesshoumaru and a little girl. I was with them the whole night. The reason I have Sesshoumaru smell was not only due to the fact that I sat right next to him the whole night, but we hugged as well. Right after that, I return to camp"
Kagome's explanation explained things a little, but it is obvious that Kagome is also not telling them the full version.
At that time, one of Kikyo's soul creatures was spotted by the group, informing them that Kikyo is close by. Inuyasha turn to look at Kagome, as if to decide whether to go or not. When Kagome closed her eyes and looked away, Inuyasha turned and started looking for Kikyo.
As Inuyasha's running sound started fading, Kagome began to kneel down on the ground and started crying.
Sango looked at Miroku in hoping to get help, but Miroku was also frowning, finding it hard to do anything else. When Sango finally found her voice again, she kneeled down besides her friend and, with a soft voice, Sango started, "Don't cry for him, Kagome, Inuyasha is not worth it"
"Y-you don't unders-s-stand Sango-chan" Kagome said between sobs, "I am not cr-cyying because of Inuyasha, all this time, when Inuyasha is a-an-angry, when you guys are clueless to w-what is going on, I have only been thinking of Se-Sesshoumaru. I have only been thinking of how much I would like to be b-beside him and talk to him like bef-fore"
Sango beamed at her friend, "Kagome-chan, is that how you feel? Towards Sesshoumaru?"
"Y-yes"
Sango paused for a while, turning to look at Miroku and Shippo to see if it is wise to state her opinion into the conversation. After a while, Sango decided to say it, "Kagome-chan, you are in love with Sesshoumaru"
Kagome's eyes widen. "What are you saying?! That is impossible!"
Shippo smiled and hugged Kagome, "Kagome, how do you feel towards Sesshoumaru?"
Kagome's eyes blinked, the tears that she has been crying out has finally halt to stop. "...I am happy to be able to talk to Sesshoumaru so close yesterday, and when we hugged...it didn't feel bad, and when he kissed me-"
Sango, Miroku as well as Shippo was surprised to hear Kagome saying that Sesshoumaru and her kissed, so shocked that the three of them at the same time have shouted "YOU GUYS KISSED? YOU?! YOU and SESSHOUMARU?!"
"Yes, at first it was Sesshoumaru who started it, but then I returned the kiss. I can't stop thinking about him all day and when I--" Kagome froze, confusing Sango, Shippo and Miroku altogether.
"I--I--I--" Kagome was struggling to say more because right in front of the gang was the lord himself.
"SESSHOUMARU" Shippo yelled, pointing to Sesshoumaru, "How dare you kiss Kagome?! I will not forgive you!" Shippo shouted, while hiding behind Miroku's legs.
"Little fox, do not worry for I will not harm you" Sesshoumaru said in a gentle voice that surprise everyone. "I am here for I cannot forget you, Kagome" Sesshoumaru said, turning to Kagome and locked his eyes with hers. "All day today, I have been thinking of only you, my mind always wonders what you are doing. The time I spent with you and Rin yesterday was something I cannot forget, even if I want to. Please, tell me what I should do--" right when Sesshoumaru finished his sentence, Kagome has appeared in front of him and embrace the youkai lord.
"All day today, I have also been thinking of you. My mind, against my will, has been thinking of only you. The time we spent together is something I will never forget as well and I, too, do not know what to do" Kagome look up into Sesshoumaru's golden amber eyes, locking together with her blue-grey oceanic eyes. "Sesshoumaru, I now know...I am in love with you..."
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alwaysAfan: OK! This is the end of 'When all I want is You'. I hope you all enjoy it. This is my first complete fanfiction. I am also writing a fanfic call 'Love you Dearly' which is an on-going series. I must say that this Oneshot 'When all I want is You' is a story I wrote at 5am, right after I just typed out chapter 6 for 'Love you Dearly', and so is not as well as I planned since I am quite tired. (I admit, I rushed the ending a little so I apologise if any of you did not enjoy the last part of the story).
At first, I planned to make this fanfic a SHORT oneshot, I don't know how I end up with this much. Though I am dead tired, I enjoy typing out this story, so I hope you all enjoy reading it!!
PLEASE, Read and Review. I am planning to write a continue oneshot for this fanfic (only a oneshot, this will not become a series), but
I would like to know the reader's opinion. So, should I make an epilogue for 'When all I want is You' or should I just leave it as it is? (I would like it if you give me the reason to why and why not)
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OK OK OK
I checked my email and boy i wanted to cry!!
There were not one, not two, but SIX reviews for this oneshot. And it have only been 1 1/2 day!!!
Thank you for sending me these reviews for i am very touched to see there are many members who wish for a Sequel for this oneshot.
Thanks to these wonderful 6 members who said they wish to see a sequel, i've decided to write the requested chapter. But it would take a while for I am currently typing 'Love you Dearly' chapter 7.
I've decided the title for the sequel of 'When all I want is You''' already. It is going to be called 'When your Love is what I get'. I really like these 2 titles and I hope all of you readers like them too. I am also planning to make another fanfic (which I do not know if it will be a on-going series or, like this fanfic, a oneshot). This fanfic story is going to be called 'For Something Worth Treasuring'. So keep a eye out for these titles!!