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Lost by Guenevere

Chapter One

She felt drained. As if someone had sucked the very life out of her. Time had taken everything away from her. The ones she loved, her family, her dignity, her friends, even her ability to hold her head up to face the day. She didn't even have the strength to get out of bed most mornings, or afternoons, or nights. They made no difference to her. Time had become one continuous loop of torment and pain. There were no people there to welcome her with open arms, no one to take her in and care for her. She didn't even go outside and when she did, it took sometimes a half hour of 'conferencing' in her head. Telling herself that she could handle what ever it was that was outside.

Exposed nerves. She never truly grasped that concept, but now she was a living one. As though someone had peeled her flesh off in strips, leaving only those exposed, and no matter where she went, or what she did there were constant reminders of the life she had lost, and what she had become.

She was so depleted that she didn't feel a thing. Nothing at all, a dull empty ache filled her. A void so black and deep that it's comfort blanketed her like a mother's warm and loving arms should. That scared her, too. That meant that the world around her was disappearing, and she was losing touch with the things that were real. At those times, she would jolt herself back to reality with sharp stabs of pain and the smell of blood. If only just to feel, something, anything.

It took her a while to grasp the concept of being alone, to understand it. And even then, she would remember the comfort of that blackness. How warm it was. How there was no pressure there. How nothing mattered. How badly she wanted, just for a week or two, to slip back into the hole, and rest. Just rest for a little while. Then she would leave a scar, to remind her that life was real. No time to rest, no mother's warmth, no loving arms, no black holes for comfort.

She died that day, when she saw the one she loved fall to the ground with a sickening gash in his abdomen, and the evil monster standing over him. When she looked at the monster all she saw was an evil grin, and a look in his eyes so insane, and so disturbing it could stop the devil himself in his tracks. In the instant it was like she could read everything in his mind, feel all the sick pleasure he was having watching her crumble in front of him. Watching her set with unshed teas waiting for her love to rise again to save her. But he didn't, he laid there unmoving, gone forever from this world. As she gazed up towards the man that stole her love away she fought the feeling trying to make its way up, to come pouring out of her mouth. She didn't know if she wanted to scream or through up, but she felt it, and fought it. He looked at her so intently it was like he wanted to engrave himself in her mind, so he could remind her every day of the ones she lost to him, what he took away from her. And he succeeded. She saw that insane look everyday after that, felt it. People avoided her now; they claimed she was mad, because she walked around with no life. As if she joined the living dead. Her eyes where lifeless showing no emotion, her smile so empty that it sent chills down your spine. Of course she didn't physically die that day; she died from within, slowly. Piece by piece, she rotted away.

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Sowwie its short, but its just a prologue so...

tell me what you think <^_^> *meow*

INUYASHA © Rumiko Takahashi/Shogakukan • Yomiuri TV • Sunrise 2000
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