blair- Sun 01 Jun 2008
i love this updATE SOON

JenJen Midnight Maiden- Fri 30 May 2008
I really love this story and can't wait for the next chapter. plz update soon!

MidnightStar- Mon 14 Apr 2008
Ummmm...Wow...I like this story.....interesting plot and story.....Very well done....Looking forward to the next chapter:)!!!!

Makinotsuki- Sat 12 Apr 2008
O'er I loved it!! Please update as soon as you can!!!!
Ja ne,

Makinotsuki- Sat 12 Apr 2008
O'er I loved it!! Please update as soon as you can!!!!
Ja ne,

Reis- Wed 19 Mar 2008
We aren't trying to flame her, tragic kiyota just point out her flaws. This is part of the process. Constructive criticism is painful but ultimately for the good of the person writing. It's the only way we become better. As an editor you cannot coddle an Author. You must point out the areas in which she must improve as well as those in which she excels. This is what most Beta readers don't understand and where they fail.

Sweetest Angel, our words were not meant to hurt your feelings or discourage you. They were for your benefit so that you can see your weaknesses and become stronger.

tragic kiyota- Wed 19 Mar 2008
Okay firstly.... I do a lot of beta reading for this girl and you guys need to understand something, this is the hard work she puts out here for your enjoyment. There is no need to run her down and make her question her ability to write. I know it can be a little confusing to read but come on seriously, cut the girl some slack. Its pretty hard to write something when you are writing in a language you don't know that well. My apologies to those who have positively commented.

Don't let them get you down Sweetest Angel. You are a good writer and your ideas are great.

Sweet_Dark_Silence- Tue 18 Mar 2008
I, I...
LOVE THIS! If you could add me to your update list, I would greatly appreciate it.

FangedBeasty- Tue 18 Mar 2008
Noooooo, that was so mean! Your a mean person leaving it hanging like that. Now I need to know what happens next!



Whitney- Tue 18 Mar 2008
I am very interested to see how this fic goes, I enjoy reading it so far, and am looking forward to the next chapter!

kotainuchan- Tue 18 Mar 2008
I'm interested in this story, but it's a bit of a chore. I feel like I'm translating it in my head while reading. Perhaps making the language a little more..... conventional, reducing the quantity of slang words and informal terms would improve the flow. I like the premise though.

Reis- Tue 18 Mar 2008
Your prose is very informal and a chore to read. The inner voice in bold letters is something of an annoyance and seeing as its tone isn't Kagome's it becomes something of a pointless gesture. The use of less than greater than signs in place of quotation marks are awkward and would be better put to use as denoting thoughts than spoken words but it's not particularly confusing.

The biggest problem is the tone of your prose. Even though your plot is interesting the way you write is too informal.

K,T,M- Mon 17 Mar 2008
please update soon

lunaticneko- Mon 17 Mar 2008
Ok now I'm just moridly curious about what she'll have to do.

mangadreams- Mon 17 Mar 2008
interesting start:)

mangadreams- Mon 17 Mar 2008
interesting start:)

UtterChaos247- Fri 29 Feb 2008
kewl, can't wait to see where this is going *^_^*

lunaticneko- Thu 07 Feb 2008
XD Can't weait to seewhat happens. How in the world will they get out???

Theresa- Wed 06 Feb 2008
*blush* you didn't have to bow. It looks good. I can't wait to get the other chapters. ;p *smiles*

FangedBeasty- Sat 02 Feb 2008
I love how this story is starting and the way that you present it. The way that you show that they are speaking bothers me a little, because I'm not used to seeing them in arrows instead of quotation marks. That is the only thing that bothers me. Other than that keep up the good work and I can not wait to read more!



Lady Kubira- Sat 02 Feb 2008
Nice job. I really an enjoying your story. Cant wait for your update.

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