And the Journey Begins ^-^....well the Journy to Sesshoumaru's Shiro at least....but the start of a new chapter in the story of Sesshoumaru and Kagome no? ^-^
I like this story very much. I've two bits of advice for you.
You have your 'there' 'their' and 'they're' mixed up.
There- location. Ex. Will you move this bag over there for me, please?
Their- possesive. Ex. Their bag is the big yellow one.
They're- They-are. Ex. They're not going to admit it, but they like the leather bag better.
You also have some places where you're lacking comma usage.
Commas when talking to a person and their name is invovled. Ex.1 "Kags, can you help me over here?" Ex.2 "Damn it, Kags!"
These bits of advice will give you better flow.
(Chapter 15) - Thu 12 Jul 2012
Great Story! I was a little disapointed in the beginning, wondering when sesshomaru was going to comw into play! But damn that was awesome! Guess im just used to stories jumping right in but yours is more of like a book and actual storyline. You explain everything and your story just gushes awesome sauce. Looking forward to more from you! ^.^
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