Prove It by Asanobara

Rubber

Kagome threw open her front door with a gusto that would have made Inuyasha proud. Yuka, Eri, and Ayumi jumped in their seats at the kitchen table. Mrs. Higurashi, who had arrived shortly after the girls, merely smiled at her obviously ruffled daughter before continuing to wash the dishes. From the look on the seventeen-year-old’s face, this was sure to be interesting.

Kagome grinned triumphantly, thrusting a hand into the air. Yuka, Eri, and Ayumi’s eyes followed said hand to find that it sported a slightly outdated camera. “Proof!” she said loudly.

The girls exchanged glances. Ayumi was the first one to recover. She turned to Kagome with narrowed eyes. “Well? Let’s see this Naruto of yours.”

Kagome’s eyes gleamed as she plopped down between Ayumi and Yuka. She quickly turned on the camera and flipped through to the first picture—the one of Sesshoumaru by himself—and handed off the camera to Ayumi. “There—I told you I wasn’t lying.”

Ayumi’s eyes bulged. Eri, wondering why the usually talkative one in their group seemed to be at a total loss for words, leaned over. Her mouth opened and shut several times, but no sound came out. Yuka, annoyed that they were leaving her out, made an irritated sound in her throat. “Come on, you guys, he can’t be that—”

“Oh kami, Kagome-chan! How the hell did you manage to snag that one?!” Ayumi finally squealed.

“He’s—he’s—what is he, some sort of model?” Eri said.

“Model? Ha!” Ayumi scoffed. “An angel’s more like it! And those eyes…”

“And that hair! Is that natural?”

“How’d you wind up with someone so perfect?”

Yuka gave up trying to prompt them into handing over the camera, and attempted to snatch it from Ayumi’s hand, but the girl merely tightened her grip and slapped her away.

Kagome smiled smugly. “Perfection seeks perfection,” she said.

Ayumi raised an eyebrow at her. “I thought it was, ‘opposites attract’?”

Kagome scowled. “You doubt my womanly charms?”

“Well, heck, not anymore!” Ayumi responded. “Where’d you meet him?”

“Er…” Damn, didn’t count on this! “I… Uh…” Her eyes, in their quest to avoid her friends’ gazes, found the clock hanging above the stove. That’s it! She gasped loudly and sprung up, a distraught expression on her face. “The time! Oh my goodness. I’m going to be late for my date!”

Eri’s eyes widened. “You mean a date with Naruto?” The plate Mrs. Higurashi had been drying slipped out of her hand at that, but she managed to catch it before it hit the ground. She sighed in relief.

Kagome nodded, biting her lip and pretending to be totally stressed out. “I’m supposed to meet him in only forty minutes at the movie theater, and I’m still dressed like this!” She motioned to her hassled appearance. “I’m so sorry you couldn’t stay and look at some of the other pictures I have—”

“Kagome-chan!” Ayumi said forcefully as she rose to her feet, the camera lying forgotten on the table. Yuka and Eri made simultaneous grabs for it. “Don’t worry! We’ll help you in any way we can. We are your best friends, y’know?”

Eri, who had lost the fight for the camera, stood up and smiled brilliantly. “That’s right, Kagome-chan! We’ll get you fixed up. You absolutely can’t let that one give you the slip!”

“OH MY GOSH HE’S FREAKING HOT!” Yuka screeched, her eyes the size of dinner plates, causing the other three girls to flinch and Mrs. Higurashi to once again almost break a dish.

“And he isn’t going to stick around long if I stand him up!” Kagome insisted as if she was truly distressed over being late for a date. “I really think you girls should go—”

“Don’t fear, Kagome!” said Yuka, rising to her feet and taking the surprised girl’s hands in her own. The look she gave her was the quintessence of sincerity and determination. “We’ll help you! You can’t afford to lose this Naruto god—er, I mean, guy. This is the kind of chance which only presents itself once in a lifetime!”

Ayumi and Eri’s eyes gleamed in anticipation. Kagome resisted the urge to gulp. “Yeah, Kagome,” said Eri slyly. “We’ll get you all cleaned up and ready for seduc—I mean, a great date,” she amended with a glance at Kagome’s mom.

It was all Kagome could do not to scream as they dragged her up the stairs to her bedroom.

-oOo-

­After an allotted seven minutes of showering, ten minutes of severe pain that she doubted even Sesshoumaru could inflict on a person as she was waxed and plucked and basically beaten into her friends’ idea of perfection, all the while being scolded by Eri for her apparent lack of “sexy clothes”, and another eight minutes of being forced into the sexiest clothes the girl had managed to procure while almost simultaneously being made up beyond recognition by Ayumi and basically screamed at about proper date etiquette by Yuka while said girl did her hair into the most painful style she could manage, she was finally deemed “almost ready.”

“—and remember Kagome-chan,” Yuka was saying as Ayumi handed her lip-gloss off to Eri, who stored it in the dainty silver purse she had lent (read: forced on) Kagome for the occasion, “A man is a man, no matter how angelic he may be, and there is only one thing a man wants.” Kagome blanched as the already risqué conversation took a turn for the worse. “The trick to keeping him around after the fact is to make him realize that one,” she held up a finger, “he wants more from you than sex; two, only you can give him said extras; and three…” She grinned wickedly as she held up the last finger. “…what sex you do participate in is the best he’ll ever get.”

Kagome giggled nervously, squirming in her seat. I can’t believe I’m discussing having sex with Sesshoumaru. He’d totally kill me if he knew. Yuka frowned and flicked her on the forehead, hard. She yelped and glared at her friend. “What the hell was that for?!”

“How many times have I told you already?” Yuka admonished. “You are a confident and mature woman. You have no need for nervous giggling when the subject of sex arises!”

“I’m not mature. I’m a freaking virgin!” Kagome insisted.

“Do you know where babies come from?” asked Yuka abruptly.

Kagome flushed. “Of course I know where babies come from!”

“Good, then you’re not a virgin.”

“I fail to see how simply knowing what sex is makes one ‘not a virgin’,” Kagome said.

Ayumi “tsked” at her. “Knowledge is power, Kagome-chan. Besides,” she added with a lecherous grin, “that guy looks like an experienced one. I’m sure you’re in good hands.”

Kagome paled. Luckily, her skin was hidden under the most makeup she’d worn in her life, so her friends didn’t seem to notice. She glanced over to her left at her full-length mirror, hoping she didn’t look too ridiculous, and her eyes popped out in shock. Eri, noticing Kagome’s expression, crossed her arms smugly. “I did alright with what I could scavenge, didn’t I?”

The miko’s eyes remained unnaturally large as she stood up from her seat next to her desk and walked over to the mirror. She vaguely registered the satisfied looks her friends were giving each other behind her back, taking in her fire engine red, skin-tight, cleavage-exposing, long-sleeved (if one could call the mess of crisscrossed straps running up and down her arms sleeves) top, which she had absolutely no memory of purchasing and suspected was the result of the sewing box currently lying ever-so-innocently on her desktop, her previously knee length white skirt, which had been hemmed and hiked until it was even shorter than her junior high uniform, and the silver sky-high heels she had sworn she’d never wear again after what she had dubbed the “fiasco wherein I was almost forced on a date with Inuyasha.”

Her eyes flickered to her hair, which had been curled and styled into a half-up, half-down do that she’d only ever seen in magazines, sparkling silver rhinestones woven into the midnight locks, and finally rested on her face. Her makeup was thick, without a doubt, seeing as any blemishes that might have dreamed of appearing on her face had been successfully thwarted, but thankfully, Ayumi had had enough practice with cosmetics that it looked almost natural. (At least as natural as coal and silver eye shadow and dark pink lipstick could look.)

“Come on, Kagome-chan, it’s almost seven!” Yuka urged, snapping her from her decidedly overly detailed analysis of her getup. “You wanna be late or what?”

“Yeah, and I still have to debrief you on the contents of your handbag!” Eri added.

Kagome turned slowly, courtesy of the heels, and was beckoned back to her seat. Once she had seated herself, Eri placed the handbag on the desk in front of her.

“Now, these,”—she withdrew lip-gloss and a small compact of powder foundation—“are only in case of an emergency, so don’t rush to use them, okay? You know how horrible you are at doing your own makeup.”

Kagome frowned and opened her mouth to protest, but Eri beat her to the chase. “These, however,” she said, pulling out a package of breath mints, “are not emergency-only, so use them.”

Kagome noticed Yuka’s eyes light up with what could only be described as perversion, and rushed to cut her off before she could destroy her innocence any further. “Anything else? I—I really am late, you know,” she said.

Eri rolled her eyes. “Next, money.”

Ayumi nodded sagely. “Always better to have it and the man pays than not have it and he doesn’t.”

“I’m certain,” Kagome said, all seriousness.

“And the last thing,” Eri said. “Condoms. I gave you three, just in case one or two bre—”

“WHAT?” Kagome squeaked, her eyes wide in horror. “What kind of girl do you think I am? We haven’t even known each other long enough for—for that kind of thing… Ow! Stop flicking me, Yuka-chan!”

Her friend withdrew the offending hand with a scalding look. “Stop acting so virginal, Kagome-chan. We’ve dressed you up like an experienced woman, but it’ll all be in vain of you don’t act the part!”

“I thought the point of love is that the person loves you for who you are,” she insisted.

“Ha! Who told you that?” Eri asked. “The same person who told you Santa Claus was real?”

Kagome grimaced. “That’s a bad example.”

“Kagome-chan,” said Ayumi in a voice that left no room for argument. “You’re bringing the condoms with you, and that’s final. Better safe than sorry, right? Besides, who wouldn’t want to have sex with this guy?” She had once again snatched up the camera, and now brandished it in front of Kagome’s face, showing her the picture she had snapped of her and Sesshoumaru together. He was displaying his typical glare, whereas her smile appeared a bit strained. “Don’t even try to tell me you haven’t fantasized about—”

“Oh my goodness, would you look at the time!” Kagome exclaimed, jumping to her feet and filching the camera from Ayumi. She didn’t even want to think about where this conversation was headed. “I really have to go…”

“Here!” Eri stuffed the lip-gloss, mints, money, and condoms back into the handbag, along with the camera and her hardly-used cellphone, and shoved it into Kagome’s hands. She took it, trying to contain a gulp at the thought of its contents.

“Thanks,” she muttered as they ushered her out her door and down the stairs.

“Do you need help down the shrine steps?” asked Ayumi when they arrived in the kitchen. Mrs. Higurashi, by some stroke of luck, was now preparing dinner in said kitchen, and, noticing the situation, raised an eyebrow at her daughter’s dress.

Kagome cleared her throat. “Erm, no thanks. I think I want to do this myself,” she said. She gave her mother a meaningful look. “I just hope I don’t fall down the well or something and break my neck.”

Eri winced. “You’re totally not convincing us, Kagome-chan.”

Mrs. Higurashi, quickly catching on, smiled and moved in. “Don’t worry, girls. Kagome-chan has been running up and down those steps since she learned to walk!” The girls exchanged glances, unconvinced, and she went on. “Why don’t you all sit down and I’ll make you some tea.”

When they didn’t move, Kagome pursed her lips and mock-narrowed her eyes at her mom, deciding it was time to intervene. “Just don’t tell them about that thing, okay Mama? They already have enough dirt on my love life as it is.”

The three girls’ heads simultaneously snapped to the older woman, who gave an innocent look. “Wouldn’t dream of it.”

The speed at which Yuka, Eri, and Ayumi abandoned Kagome to scamper over to the kitchen table was borderline demonic. Kagome held back a grin, rolling her eyes. “See you guys tomorrow,” she called, opening the door. They didn’t even look up. Typical gossips. She wondered absently what her mother would tell them. She leaned on the creative side, after all.

The door swung shut behind her, and her eyes traversed the shrine grounds. Night was just beginning to fall, a warm breeze blowing across the area and ruffling her skirt. Her lips twisted into a frown as she set off for the well house, tugging her skirt down as far as the altered waistband would allow as she went.

That was my favorite skirt, too! She glared at her provocative attire. They just had to put me in these colors, didn’t they? He’s totally going to think I’m making a pass at him! And then he’ll kill me!

She threw open the door to the well house and tossed a look over her shoulder to make sure no one was watching—no one was, thank goodness—before closing it behind her. She descended the steps and swung her legs over the side of the well, weighing her options. She could just wait here in the well house for a few hours for her friends to go home before returning to her house, but she had to go back to the Sengoku Jidai at some point, and she had a feeling Sesshoumaru would be even less pleasant if he was kept waiting.

Oh wait, I was going to get him some proof… She popped open her handbag and poked at the lip-gloss, foundation, and mints, trying not to look at the condoms in the process. She stopped herself before she could bite her lip—lipstick and teeth don’t exactly mix. What was she supposed to use as this “proof” of hers? Well, I do have the advantage of him thinking I’m a “stupid human”, so I guess I could pretend I thought this handbag would be somehow significant. She eyed her heels warily. Or maybe the heels? They certainly aren’t something you’d find five hundred years ago.

She shook her head to clear it, snapping the borrowed handbag shut. Any plans she made in advance would probably wind up totally mixed up anyway, so why bother? She’d gotten pretty good at winging it these last two years; certainly she could cope. Surely, he wouldn’t kill her for something so insignificant. He seemed reasonable enough, after all.

Not giving herself time to talk herself out of it, she straightened up, set her jaw firmly, and jumped.

-oOo-

Great. I’m at the bottom of a well in heels more obnoxious than Hojo on Valentine’s Day. Now what?

Kagome regarded the vines creeping up the sides of the well with a guarded expression. She should have known something like this would happen! She huffed a short sigh and expanded her senses. Sure enough, Sesshoumaru’s presence appeared on what she had dubbed the miko radar only a few yards away. Seeing no other options, she cleared her throat and called out tentatively into the approaching night, “Sesshoumaru?” When there was no response, she steeled herself and repeated his name more loudly: “Sesshoumaru, can you come here for a second?”

After a moment’s pause, she felt his youki approach the well, and soon his head popped out over the top. His face was shadowed, such that she couldn’t make out his expression, but she doubted that would have made any difference. Mustering up her courage, she went on. “I can’t get up by myself. These shoes are kind of… yeah,” she finished lamely. He continued to stare at her for approximately two seconds before he turned away, disappearing from sight.

Kagome felt a vein pop on her forehead. “What the hell? I’m a member of the fairer sex here, y’know! At least have the decency to give me a hand. These shoes are a form of torture even you have yet to exploit!”

When a response was not forthcoming, she growled under her breath. That asshat! I’ll show him, all right. She stuffed the handle of Eri’s handbag onto her wrist for safekeeping and grabbed hold of the vines in front of her. With a deep, determined breath, she began to haul herself up the side of the well. With her heels being as annoyingly high as they were, it was twice as slow as usual, and her pissed-off attitude towards the unhelpful taiyoukai grew by the second. By the time her hand found the top of the well, she had prepared an almost complete scolding for him.

She pulled herself up until she could see over the lip of the well and, catching sight of him a few feet away, opened her mouth to start on the aforementioned scolding when the vine under her right foot, on which she had placed most of her weight, snapped. Her eyes widened as her grip on the wood loosened and she toppled backwards, her hands grasping thin air.

She was jolted from her almost dream-like free-falling state when she felt a hand wrap around her forearm, preventing her from falling further. She quickly wrapped her other hand around the arm in her fright. Sure, she knew if she fell she’d just end up on the other side of the well, but that didn’t mean she wasn’t scared of falling! She vaguely registered Sesshoumaru’s voice commanding her to remove herself from his person (or something like that), and opened eyes that she didn’t realize she’d shut to see that he had already pulled her up almost completely out of the well and was waiting for her to put her legs on the other side of the lip before putting her down.

She clumsily swung her right leg over the side of the well in her struggle to regain her balance, but found herself unable to get her left leg high enough to make it all the way over. Sesshoumaru, apparently annoyed at her inability to get out of the well, glanced down to see what was taking her so long. His eyes widened and his grip on her arm loosened.

Kagome let out a squeak of terror as she began to once again fall backwards, but this time her flailing hands connected with his hair, and she grabbed a hold. His head was jerked forward by her weight, and he caught the lip of the well with one hand to steady himself. She gulped as he growled, his eyes flashing red.

“Wench. Remove yourself from this Sesshoumaru’s hair.”

“But I’ll fall!” she wailed, her hands fisting in the smooth silver strands.

“That is none of my concern,” he bit back. “Let go.”

“No! Just help me up. Is that so hard?”

“Yes.”

“Why?! I’m not that heavy!”

“That is not the issue. Release my hair.”

“What do you mean, ‘that is not the issue’? Help me, dammit!” She made a horrified sound in her throat when her hands slipped slightly down his hair. The back of her right thigh, which was still swung over the side of the well, rubbed painfully against the dry wood. She was definitely seeing splinters on her horizon. “Oh my gosh I’m gonna fall! I hate falling. It’s so scary!”

He growled again as she made a pathetic attempt to climb up his hair like a rope. “Let go at once.”

“Just help me and there won’t be any problems!” she whined.

“No. You will return through the portal and return again in appropriate attire.”

Kagome paused. Huh? She stopped struggling and looked up at him. “What do my clothes have to do with…?” She stopped abruptly, her mouth forming a small “o”, when she understood. Then when he dropped me it was because…? Her eyes danced with mischief, her lips pulling into a haughty smirk. “Aw, is Sesshoumaru too distracted by Kagome’s blindingly gorgeous, mile-long, super-soft and lacking cellulite of even the smallest volume legs?” she simpered. “I have to admit, I never took you for a leg man, but I suppose I can work with—”

He snarled, cutting her off, and took hold of his hair with his free hand. Her mouth opened when she saw what he was going to do, but didn’t have time to protest before he gave a hard jerk towards him. Her grip failed, and she, for the third time in one day, tumbled backwards into the well.

At least, she thought she was going to tumble back into the well, but suddenly she was being once again lifted upwards by a hand around her forearm. This time, he pulled her all the way out of the well, discarding her on the grass in front of him. His hand came to rest on the hilt of Toukijin, and she scrambled backwards as far as she could to escape him, pulling down her skirt in the process—damned Eri. He glared at her as he began to withdraw his sword. “You will die this day and end your hindrance to this Sesshoumaru…”

“Wait-wait-wait,” she said, cutting him off. “What about the proof I’m from the future? You realize this is a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity, right?”

“You have insulted this Sesshoumaru, and therefore shall die…”

“NO!” she shrieked, interrupting him again. “I didn’t really mean it. It was just a joke! I’m sure you’ve seen much better legs than mine!”

His eyes narrowed. “You joke far too often for this Sesshoumaru’s liking.”

She giggled uncertainly. She was just glad that he hadn’t further withdrawn his sword. “Is that so? I’ll try to keep that to a minimum in the future.”

“I smell your lie.”

“Oh. Um, that’s great, I guess.” She swallowed as she pulled herself to her feet, brushing bits of grass off her skirt. She looked up to see him scowling at her, and pursed her lips. “You got a problem or what?” she snapped.

“You attempt to seduce this Sesshoumaru,” he accused.

She rolled her eyes. “More like my friends are attempting to seduce you vicariously through me, thus preventing me from returning with meaningful proof.”

“Hn. You have no proof?” His hand once again tightened on his sword. Obviously, his temper was on a short fuse at the moment.

Kagome, fully intending to survive to the next day, rushed to correct herself. “Of course I have proof, silly!” she bluffed. She stepped back to give him a nice view of her heels, striking a pose. “You don’t exactly see these in the year 1500, do you?”

His eyes didn’t budge from her face. “You are overly confident when it concerns your legs, wench,” he said. “They are at best second-rate.”

She flushed angrily. “I’m not talking about my legs you idiot! And what do you mean, ‘second-rate’? I freaking forgo ramen for these!”

“You doubt this Sesshoumaru’s intelligence?”

“Well, if the shoe fits!” she said. She shook her head before she could piss him off any more than was necessary. “The shoes, Sesshoumaru. I was talking about the shoes.” She turned sideways to show off the strappy torture devices.

He looked down, a bored expression on his face, and studied said shoes for a couple seconds before his gaze returned to her face. Her cheeks heated up as she realized she’d just inadvertently pulled the old “Look at my shoes. OMG you just checked me out!” trick from grade school. She crossed her arms over her chest, suddenly feeling a bit self-conscious, but thought better of it. Eri was decidedly far too skilled as a seamstress.

“Your ‘shoes,’ as you seem to think of them, are insufficient,” he intoned.

She felt a vein pop on her forehead. “What do you mean, ‘insufficient’? They’re sufficient enough for me. In fact, I’m pretty sure they’re the most excessively sufficient shoes you’ll see for at least the next five centuries!”

“Your yelling annoys this Sesshoumaru. You will be silent and procure more proof or die by my sword.”

“I am not yelling!” She stopped herself when she realized she’d just said that about twenty decibels louder than an “inside voice” and sent him an angered look, lowering her voice. “I am not yelling!” she whisper-shouted. “If I don’t have proof, I don’t have proof, okay? It’s not like there’s much I can do about it! I can’t show up in my time for at least the next few hours, anyway, so you’re just going to have to wait.”

He frowned slightly, his eyes flickering to the handbag still pushed haphazardly onto her wrist. “What is that?”

She followed his gaze to the bag. “My purse. Why?”

“Give it to me.”

All the blood in her body promptly rushed to her face. “No!” She lowered her voice, trying to force herself not to blush. “I mean, uh, no thanks. It’s nothing interesting, you know, just—”

“You will give me your ‘purse’ or die, human wench,” he said, a hint of a growl creeping into his voice.

“I really don’t think that’s a good idea—”

“Give me your purse.”

She reluctantly pulled the strap over her hand and held it out for him. Please don’t ask about the condoms, Sesshoumaru. Just please don’t ask about the condoms. He took the purse from her and opened it. She kept her eyes glued to his hands, willing him not to notice the less-than-welcome objects in her handbag. He pulled out the lip-gloss first and brought it to his nose for a whiff. “Explain this object.”

“It’s lip-gloss. Like lip paint, only it’s flavored and shiny.”

“Flavored?”

“Yeah.” She licked her lips experimentally. “Cotton candy, I believe. It’s sweet.”

“Hn. Useless.” He tossed the lip-gloss into the grass, missing the glare she shot in his direction. The next think he pulled out was the money. “What is this?”

“Money. That’s worth half a dinner at a nice restaurant.”

“You place value in paper?”

“It represents gold or silver kept in a reserve called a bank,” she responded. He tucked the money away in the sleeve of his kimono for safekeeping, and she looked at him incredulously. “You’re stealing my money? You’re a freaking mugger!”

“I do not know what a ‘mugger’ is, nor do I care to know,” he responded. Plastic crunched as he rummaged in the bag. Her heart sped up. No! Not yet! I haven’t thought of an explanation yet! She almost sighed in relief when he pulled out the box of mints. “What are these?”

“Mints,” she said. “For your breath.”

His golden eyes hardened. “You would presume that this Sesshoumaru has bad—?”

“I’m not presuming anything!” she said. “Anyway, that’s all there is to see, so if you’d just give me back the purse—”

“What are these?”

She whitened as he held up two of the three condoms between clawed fingers. After a moment’s silence, he looked up and glowered at her. “Why are you not answering?”

“Um… uh… that is…” She swallowed. Come on, Kagome! Think! “It’s… er… a special thing we call a… erm… a rubber?”

“A rubber,” he repeated.

She cringed internally at his use of the word. That sounds so wrong coming from him! “Correct.”

“And what is the purpose of these rubbers of yours?”

“They’re not mine!” she protested, cheeks flaming.

He raised an eyebrow at her. “You are avoiding the question, wench.”

“Am not!” She stopped herself as an idea presented itself to her, and for the first time in her life, she thanked whoever might happen to be listening for her lack of a love life. “I just don’t know exactly how to use it,” she said carefully.

“Why not?”

He just had to ask that, didn’t he? She averted her eyes. “The opportunity to learn has yet to present itself,” she mumbled.

“You sound disappointed.”

She looked daggers at him. “I’m not disappointed!” she hissed.

“Your deceit is most aromatic,” he responded dryly.

“Your sense of smell is most annoying,” she retorted. This whole “I smell your lying” thing was getting out of hand…

Without a word, he returned to his examination of the condom. “Surely you have some idea what the purpose of a rubber is,” he said after a moment’s pause. She could have sworn he had said that just to make her uncomfortable—it worked.

“Well, um, yes, but you really don’t want my explanation,” she said.

“Explain.”

“Ah…” She racked her brain. “Well… um…” Oh, come on, Kagome! You’re a straight-A student and you’re only in school twenty percent of the time! What’s with the sudden stupidity lately? “It’s sort of like… erm…” She crossed her fingers discreetly behind her back. “It’s a sort of barrier.”

“I sense no youki or reiki from it.”

“That’s because it’s a manmade barrier.”

“It appears rather flimsy,” he remarked.

“It’s not a very high-quality one, I guess,” she responded.

“What is this barrier meant to keep out?”

You’ve gotta be kidding me! “Uh… it’s so that… things don’t happen before you’re ready for them?”

“’Things’?”

“Yeah? Er, I mean, yeah.” She cleared her throat. “Some things in life”—children—“are good, but only when the time is right. This con—rubber keeps them from… happening before they’re ready.”

“Hn.” Kagome held her breath as he continued to stare at the condom as if daring it to question him. The temporally displaced miko mused that no self-respecting condom would ever venture so far as to defy him, and promptly winced at her thoughts. Damn Yuka! Now every time I see him, the first thing that’s going to pop into my mind is him giving a condom the death glare!

In a swift motion, the condoms joined her money in the sleeve of his kimono, and he tossed the purse back to her, none-the-gentler. She caught it awkwardly as he said, “Your proof is less-than-sufficient.” Her heart sank, but he went on, not knowing or not caring. “You will bring me more evidence of your origins tomorrow evening at sunset.”

“But Inuyasha will want to leave by then!”

“I suggest you convince him otherwise.” He turned to go, but her ire boiled up and over.

“You!” she demanded, stopping him a few feet away. He didn’t even bother to look back, leaving her talking to a curtain of silver hair, which only served to piss her off more. “You… have absolutely no concept of diplomacy!”

This did cause him to look at her. She almost thought she saw a flicker of surprise in his usually passive golden orbs, but it was gone so quickly she was left second-guessing her eyesight. “Explain.”

She rested her hands on her hips, smirking. “Give and take,” she said. “I may be human, but that doesn’t give you the right to boss me around. There’s not much keeping me from just hopping over into my time and never coming back, y’know? If I take the jewel shards with me, that’s a sure way to make sure Naraku never wins. I expect payment for this proof of yours.”

She felt his aura brush against hers, but firmly held her ground against the dark energy swirling around him, the only evidence of his anger. No way was she letting him intimidate her, not after he’d almost thrown her down a well. After a few moments, the anger subsided slightly, and again she caught that lingering glimmer of surprise and, dare she say it, curiosity, but it once again vanished before she could analyze it.

“What sort of payment do you suggest?”

She had to hold back a sigh of relief. She hadn’t been expecting that to work! She firmly resolved to be more self-preserving when it came to the taiyoukai from now on. She wetted her lips, tilting her head to the side while she thought. What did she want, exactly? She wasn’t sure—it wasn’t like she kept a list of things to ask Sesshoumaru for when she got the chance! Perhaps I’d better keep it vague…

“How about you just owe me?” she suggested. “Three favors to be collected whenever I so desire sounds like a good enough payment for me. I can’t ask Inuyasha to call off the shard hunt just to convince you I’m not just overly-imaginative, so how about every time I go through the well, I bring something back to show you the next time we meet? That’s about once every week or two, longer during the summer. I’ll make sure the proof is meaningful this time.”

“I will not be indebted to a human wench,” Sesshoumaru said, his voice bordering on a growl.

Kagome immediately set out to pacify him. “Hey, this isn’t easy for me, either. Bringing stuff back from the future to show you could wind up creating a paradox that would rip a hole in the space-time continuum itself. That sounds a bit more important than your pride, doesn’t it? Besides, I think you know me well enough to know I wouldn’t ask for your lands or something like that, and if it makes you feel any better, priestesses are technically a step up from your typical human wench.”

He didn’t answer for a long time, and she thought he might have changed his mind about giving “diplomacy” a chance, but then he surprised her: “I will accept your agreement with two additional conditions.”

She bit her lip. “Go on.”

“First, you will not ask for anything related to this Sesshoumaru’s relationship with the half-breed.”

“I wasn’t planning on that, anyway,” she said, waving her hand. That totally should have occurred to me. I could have wished him to stop attacking his brother on sight. “What’s the second?”

His gaze travelled disdainfully up and down her sleazily dressed figure, making her wish she’d snatched a jacket on the way out. Or a trench coat. “You will don appropriate attire when you are in this Sesshoumaru’s presence.”

Her hateful look morphed into a leer halfway to her face. “You’re asking me to change in front of you? How forward. I mean, I know I am the epitome of feminine beauty and all, but—”

“I have changed my mind. There is now a third condition.”

Her mouth snapped shut. “What? You can’t just—!”

“You will no longer twist this Sesshoumaru’s words to fit your purposes,” he interrupted. His head lifted slightly as if he was hearing something. He gave her a last glance over his shoulder as he once again turned away. “When we meet again, you will have evidence of your origins, or die.”

“Wait! You can’t just leave!” she protested. “I haven’t even agreed yet!” She stomped a heeled foot angrily, but then teetered and almost fell over. Thankfully, she managed to right herself before she could make a bigger fool of herself than she already had, but the damage was done. Sesshoumaru had disappeared into the night.

With a heavy sigh, she wobbled over to the well and sat down on its lip. That taiyoukai was sure to be the death of her. But then again, he did now owe her three requests. When she thought about it, he really had gotten the shorter end of the stick in this little deal of theirs—she just had to play her cards right.

Kagome grinned wickedly. She hadn’t lost a game of Blackjack in her life.

-oOo-

Disclaimer: Inuyasha et al is property of Rumiko Takahashi. (Please insert applause here.) However, I do own this story, and if you steal it, I will get really pissed off at you. As a side note, inspiration for this story comes from Sunset Miko’s Weekly Challenges (2014). I have decided that I like the idea of writing each chapter around a specific idea, and therefore will do so. The names of the chapters, you’ll notice, come from there. This means that chapters may vary greatly in length.

Note: Sorry about the extremely delayed update. I was sick for two weeks—without my computer! I’ll try to be more prompt in the future. ^.^

Thanks for reading!