Kettle Pot by Luna C.
Dating Advice
Summary: Inuyasha decides to help his brother with some dating issues
Disclaimer: I do not own Inuyasha
Dating Advice
“Can you just her out already?” his younger half-brother grumbled underneath his breath, glaring with golden-hued eyes at the older male, who was uncharacteristically pacing the length of the room.
“Unlike your moronic self, simply going up to the woman is out of the question.”
Inuyasha sighed, trying to figure out why he was helping his dense older brother. Helping him wasn’t benefiting at all, and he wouldn’t dare say he was doing it out of the goodness of his own heart. That damn wench was bugging, and… maybe it was benefiting him, the woman would keep her mouth shut for some time if he accomplished this minuscule task. “Look, it’s really simple, you go up to her and say ‘hey, do you want to go on a date with me, dinner and a movie’ it’s not hard to say, idiot.”
Sesshomaru ignored the insulted name. “She’s not like any other female, I will not approach her like a brute.”
“Look man, just do this, it always works for me.” Inuyasha glared at Sesshomaru when he started opening his mouth to say something undoubtedly smart. “She’s probably a simple, easy-to-please chick.”
“I need to get her some roses.”
Inuyasha felt like banging his head against the wall. “You don’t even gotta do that! Gods, why is it so hard to understand, you’re the damn genius, now go up to her and say what I’ve said! You ain’t gotta buy anything to ask a woman out!” Kami, Kagome better appreciate what he was doing, it was like talking to a wall, a very icy, asshole-ish wall.
“There’s a possibility of her rejecting me.”
“Well yeah, if only you act like your usual asshole self. And don’t do pickup lines, girls always find them cheesy and it makes you look lame as hell, like you’re desperate or something.” Inuyasha had to hold his smirk in when Sesshomaru stopped pacing and held his head, as if a massive migraine was forming. “Why are you stressing? It’s just some chick.”
“She’s not some chick as you eloquently put it,” Sesshomaru glared harshly at the younger male, which caused him to back up a bit. “She deserves to be woo.”
Inuyasha blinked. “Woo?” he started to snicker, shuffling a few steps to the right to miss a flying piece of decoration. “I never pegged you as a romantic pansy type of guy and don‘t be throwing shit at me!” he yelled out, barely missing a small rock-hard model. “Anyways, stop being a wuss and just do what I said, I guarantee that it would work.”
Sesshomaru stared at the younger man in a stoic manner, his golden eyes unsurprisingly blank. “Fine, I will go to her.”
“You could just text her.”
“Only scums do that and I am not a scum.”
Inuyasha merely shook his head, watching his older brother leave. “Okay, tell me what Kagome says about your dating proposal.” he laughed when Sesshomaru quickly turned to look at him with slightly widened eyes.
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Prompt: A fool may give a wise man council
Word Count: 500
Stella’s Proverbial Challenge