Pictures by Himura Asami

Pictures

This won’t be good, so don’t feel inclined to read it. I just needed to get this idea out of my mind.

Disclaimer: I don’t own anything.

            Shippo and Miroku walked side by side.

            “You know,” Shippo said, “I think you should be ashamed of yourself. You should be way more protective of her. You’ve been living with her since you were five and she’s your cousin.”

            Miroku chuckled. “She’s your best friend and you aren’t doing anything about it.”

            Shippo nodded. “Touché.”

            They walked in silence for a while, before Shippo spoke again.

            “How many do you have?” he asked, pretending to be uninterested.

            “Only ten today.”

            Shippo whistled. “Ten, huh? Well, that’s still a lot of money, isn’t it?”

            “Yeah. It’s about 200 dollars.”

            “Why’d you only take ten?”

            Miroku looked at Shippo out of the corner of his eye. “Because, these are special.”

            Shippo’s eyes widened in to saucers. “Seriously? Special as in, they’re-going-to-run-for-more-than-the-regular-rate-special?”

            Miroku nodded. “I’m going to push for 400 this time.”

            “Wow. That’s a lot. You going to take Sango out or something?”

            “It’s our one-year anniversary tomorrow.”

            “Well that explains it.”

            The walked the rest of the way without talking to each other.

            When they reached their destination, Miroku raised his hand to knock, but he didn’t even get the chance to rap on the door before it was opened by a glaring inu youkai male.

            The inu youkai gave a short nod of acknowledgement to Shippo and then turned to glare at Miroku.

            “You’re late.”

            Miroku smiled charmingly. “My apologies, Sesshomaru. But, worry not, I have the merchandise. May we come in?”

            Sesshomaru stepped aside, and Miroku and Shippo entered the house, closing the door behind them.

            Sesshomaru began walking, and they followed him. They reached the stairs, and Sesshomaru had already begun climbing, when his father appeared.

            “Ah, hello boys.”

            “Hey, Toga!” Shippo said with a wave.

            “Good afternoon, Mr. Taisho.”

            The adult male turned to his son. “Are you guys headed up to your room, Sesshomaru?”

            Sesshomaru nodded.

            “Can I come along?”

            “No.”

            Toga rolled his eyes. “Come on, Sesshomaru. I think it’s weird that those two are the only people you let into your room. You don’t even let you’re sister inside. What exactly do you have up there?”

            Toga leaned forward, waiting for a response.

            “It’s none of your concern,” Sesshomaru said, before turning away and continuing to climb the stairs.

            Miroku and Shippo followed Sesshomaru upstairs, chuckling all the while as Toga muttered about “stupid disrespectful sons and their overzealous protection of their territory.”

            They reached Sesshomaru’s room and the inu youkai opened his door. He ushered in his guests before closing and locking the door.

            Miroku and Shippo looked around the familiar room; both of them smirking as the examined the reason Sesshomaru wouldn’t let anyone else into his room.

            Every wall, every piece of furniture, every bare space was covered in pictures. There were piles of photos on the floor and boxes of photos and stacks and bins of them. Not just any pictures, but pictures of Kagome, Miroku’s cousin and Shippo’s best friend.

            Most of them were candid shots. Others had the subject posing. Sometimes she was in her pajamas, other times she was in casual clothing, and sometimes, she was barely wearing any clothing at all. In some she smiled and in others she was pouting, or laughing, or frowning, or glaring.

            Miroku shook his head and turned to Sesshomaru, who was sitting in the chair at his desk. The desk was the only space that wasn’t covered in photos. It had one picture of Kagome in a frame, a laptop, and Sesshomaru’s extremely large wallet.

            Miroku’s smile widened and he made a mental note to thank Kagome for being herself. By doing just that, she was making him a very rich man.

            “Well,” Sesshomaru said expectantly.

            “Ah, yes. One moment,” Miroku said.

            He reached into his pocket and pulled out an envelope. He placed it in front of Sesshomaru on his desk and stood over his shoulder. Shippo came over and watched with Miroku as Sesshomaru opened the sealed envelope.

            “There’s less than usual, but they’re better quality,” Miroku explained as Sesshomaru turned around to face his two visitors.

            He flipped through the photos and his eyes widened minutely. He quickly schooled his expression, but he wasn’t quite fast enough because both Miroku and Shippo noticed.

            Miroku and Shippo exchanged looks, one of them smirking, the other trying to repress his chuckles.

            Sesshomaru cleared his throat and looked away from the pictures.  “How much?”

            “Well, obviously, they’re going to be more than the flat rate we usually use.”

            Sesshomaru nodded. “I’ll give you 500 at most.”

            Shippo’s mouth fell open, and Miroku mirrored his expression.

            “Wh-what…” Miroku sputtered.

            Sesshomaru’s jaw clenched. “Six. No more.”

            Shippo began to gape like a fish as Sesshomaru jacked up the price of his own accord.

            Miroku shook his head. “Sesshomaru!”

            “750. Max,” Sesshomaru said, narrowing his eyes and pursing his lips.

            Miroku opened and closed his mouth repeatedly, before narrowing his eyes, his face taking on a shrewd expression. “Come on, Sesshomaru. You can do better than that. I intended to sell these for 5,000, but, seeing as you’re so cheap, I’ll settle for one grand.”

            Shippo’s mouth dropped open and he shook his head dumbly. Miroku really knew how to take advantage of a situation and con people out of their money.

            A muscle in Sesshomaru’s jaw twitched, before he nodded sharply and turned around to grab his wallet. He pulled out several bills and handed them to Miroku, who took them eagerly.

            “Nice doing business with you, Sesshomaru,” Miroku said with a small smile.

            “Hn,” Sesshomaru replied.

            Shippo shook his hear as he watched them, slightly disturbed by the transaction. Miroku had definitely come out on top with this deal. After all, Miroku was walking away with six hundred dollars more than he had originally wanted, and Sesshomaru only received ten pictures of Kagome.

            Honestly, Shippo felt sort of sorry for Sesshomaru.

            He was sure that if he actually bothered to talk to Kagome that she would gladly go on a date with him.

            But, Sesshomaru never talked to her.

            “We’ll be leaving now,” Miroku said.

            Sesshomaru nodded.

            “Actually,” Shippo said. “I need to talk to Sesshomaru about something really quickly, Miroku. Can you wait for me outside?”

            Both Sesshomaru and Miroku looked at him questioningly, but Miroku nodded.

            “That’s fine. Don’t take too long though.”

            Shippo agreed and Miroku walked out of the room, leaving Sesshomaru and Shippo alone.

            “What is it?” Sesshomaru asked.

            He sounded impassive, but Shippo could tell that he was annoyed.

            “You probably want to integrate those pictures into your system, right? Well, I won’t keep you long, but I do want to talk to you about Kagome.”

            Sesshomaru raised an eyebrow. “I was under the impression that you had gotten over your hesitancy when it came to invading her privacy.”

            Shippo scratched the back of his head. “When you say it that way, it sort of makes me sound immoral.”

            Sesshomaru blinked.

            Shippo cleared his throat. “I’m not talking about you invading her privacy. I want to talk about this whole arrangement. How long are you planning to keep this up? Do you ever plan to ask her out? Because this won’t work out in the long run. I mean, be reasonable, Sesshomaru. This is sort of creepy and you can’t keep this up forever.”

            Sesshomaru stared at him. “Are you finished?”

            “Uh... Yeah. I guess so.”

            Sesshomaru turned reached into his pocket and pulled out his cellphone. He touched the screen and tapped it a few more times, before handing it over to Shippo.

            Shippo took the device carefully and looked at the screen.

            “What am I looking at?”

            “A calendar.”

            “Why?”

            “Look at the eighth.”

            Shippo’s eyes went to the upcoming Friday and then proceeded to bulge out so far that they looked as if they were about to fall out of the sockets.

            “You… You’ve got a date with Kagome.”

            “Yes.”

            Shippo looked at him. “You two are going on a date?”

            Sesshomaru nodded.

            “Woah. I mean, woah. But, you still bought those pictures!”

            “The world of commerce and trade will not stop simply because she agreed to go out on a date with me.”

            Shippo stared at him. “So you’re going to keep on buying these pictures of her?”

            “I intend to.”

            “But, what if she finds out? She’ll be mad. And she’ll probably think it’s creepy. And she’ll definitely break up with you.”

            Sesshomaru leveled Shippo with a stare. “She will not find out.”

            Shippo paled, hearing the underlying and excruciatingly detailed threat in the words.

            “Right!” he said. “Right. Of course. I mean, there isn’t any way for her to find out, so she won’t find out and she won’t break up with you.”

            Sesshomaru nodded and held his hand out.

            Shippo stared at it, before hastily placing the phone he was still holding in Sesshomaru’s outstretched hand.

            Sesshomaru turned around, and Shippo nodded vigorously, taking it as the dismissal that it was. “Right. So, I’m going to leave now.”

            Sesshomaru didn’t respond.

            Shippo dashed out of the room and made sure to shut the door firmly behind him, before proceeding to run out of the house as fast as he could.

            He panted when he got outside, and felt a hand on his shoulder. He jumped, startled, but calmed once he saw that the hand belonged to Miroku.

            “Are you alright? You look as though Kagome had found out that you ate her helping of oden.”

            Shippo shivered briefly as the heavily repressed memory surfaced, before shaking it off and turning to fully face Miroku.

            “Sesshomaru’s going out on a date with Kagome and he’s going to kill me if she finds out about the pictures he bought and still plans to buy! I don’t want to die, but sometimes I can’t help telling Kagome things. You know that! How am I going to survive? I’m going to have to go into hiding! I’m doomed!”

            Miroku stared at him blankly. “Sesshomaru’s going on a date with Kagome?”

            “Yes!”

            “This is an unexpected development. Do you think I could get him to pay more for pictures of the two of them together?”

            “Miroku! Did you hear a word I just said? I’m going to die if Kagome finds out, and Kagome isn’t going to be the only one to kill me. With my luck, I’ll probably die twice! What if it slips out? I’ll be more tempted to tell her than ever before now!”

            Miroku smiled genially and gave Shippo another comforting pat on the shoulder.

            “Don’t worry. I’m sure even if you end up telling Kagome everything, she’ll forgive you and forbid Sesshomaru from killing you.”

            Shippo nodded. “Yeah. You’re right!”

            “Of course,” Miroku began, suddenly solemn, “if Sesshomaru catches you without Kagome nearby, he’ll slaughter you on the spot and then pin it on someone else. He’d get off scotch free and come out on top with everything he wanted.”

            Shippo’s hopeful expression vanished. “I’m doomed.”

            Miroku nodded in agreement. “Well, you would be, but fear not! There’s still hope.”

            “There is?” Shippo asked in a timid voice.

            Miroku slung his arm around Shippo’s shoulder. “I happen to know a guy who can make anyone disappear. He’s really cheap too. The last time someone contacted him, he only made him pay $10,000– in ten easy installments of 1,000 over a course of ten months, too. Of course, I’ll need to take some extra for the contact fee, but it’s a great deal.”

            “I don’t have to run away yet, do I?” Shippo asked, inwardly cringing at the thought of having to pay $10,000 dollars he didn’t have to hide from Sesshomaru.

            “Well, no,” Miroku conceded. “But, it’s best to be prepared. A down payment of $500 should get you to the top of the list whenever you end up telling Kagome.”

            Shippo winced.

            Miroku smiled.

            Back at home, Kagome sneezed repeatedly. It took a few minutes for the sneezes to stop, but when they did, she rubbed her nose roughly.

            “I wonder if someone’s talking about me…”

            She bit her lip contemplatively, before shrugging and going about her business.

I’ve always thought that Sesshomaru would be the type to collect illicit and everyday photographs of Kagome and spend ridiculous amounts of money to amass his humungous collection, too.

*Shrug*

T.N.T!

 

INUYASHA © Rumiko Takahashi/Shogakukan • Yomiuri TV • Sunrise 2000
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