Rin's Letter by Sy Sheer

Stories

Dear Hana,

            Today I have a new story to tell you.  This story is one that I needed to tell you a while ago, but some people didn't want me to.  This story starts when I was just a little girl like you were when you first found out how your mom and dad met.

            Yokai aren't as different from humans as we used to think.  They make plans for the future, they love their families, they mourn their lost ones.  The one thing that the humans seemed to think made them so completely different was the fact that yokai had a connection to their familiars.

            One such yokai might have a dog familiar, one might have a bear, or even a bird.  The yokai in this story had a dog familiar.  His had amazing silver hair and the brightest golden eyes.  There were times where I thought that I'd never want to see a dog again if it weren't as beautiful as he.  The dog's name that was shared with the yokai, was Sesshomaru.  'The Killing Perfection', and the name suited them both.

            Together they broke many hearts and many bodies as well.  He was a dangerous, ruthless killer until he met a very special someone.

           Now, I'd like to be able to say that it was me who changed his life, but I'm afraid that's something I cannot claim.  That honor belongs to your dearest mother.  My adopted mother, and best friend.

            I came to know Sesshomaru when he found me dead, I'd been attacked by some dangerous wolf yokai.  Sesshomaru had a sword that he used, it was able to save my life.  The sword only works once.  That was the warning he gave me. 

            I lived with him for several years, and he remained cold and icy.  He warmed up to me, and he loved me like a daughter, but to everyone else he remained unchanged.  He had only two first generation relatives alive at the time.  His half-brother, Inuyasha, who was a half yokai.  And then his mother, whom of which he wasn't on friendly terms with.

            Jaken was his little errand toad.  Whenever Sesshomaru needed something done, he'd send Jaken off to do it. 

            At the same time this was happening, Inuyasha was traveling with a group of humans who were searching for a jewel that a certain clumsy female shattered.

            That group had Kagome, Inuyasha, Miroku, Sango, Shippo, and Kirara.  When I first met them Kagome found me running around a field of flowers, and she hadn't noticed Ah-un or Jaken in the woods right on the edge of the field.  She thought I was lost and came to see if she could help me go back home.

            When I told her that I was traveling with Sesshomaru she decided that she'd stay with me until he came back.  She said it was to make sure that I was safe until then.  But I think she was making sure that I really was traveling with him, and that Sesshomaru would take care of me correctly.

            Sesshomaru came back in what seemed like a couple minutes, but Kagome and I were talking and doing stuff in the field, so it was probably closer to a couple hours.  When Sesshomaru came onto the field, looking rather upset about something, Kagome had jumped to her feet.  I couldn't understand at the time why she was so fidgety and nervous.

            But looking back she liked him even then.  I don't know if she was telling the truth or if she was acting, because she was also talking about liking Inuyasha.  She could have been in love with them both, but with different types of love.

            At the time I was sure that Kagome could take over as my mother.  So I asked Sesshomaru if he'd let Kagome be my mother.  At first he was against it, but a couple years of coming in contact with Kagome, and my begging, he reluctantly agreed and asked Kagome to take the position.

            And that's how your parents got mated, but that's not how they fell in love.  That started long before they got mated.  I have a few pictures and letters here in this letter for you.  Maybe if you have questions, Kagome or Sesshomaru could answer them for you.

  Love you forever,

            Your big sister, Rin

Kagome smiled as she finished reading the letter that Rin had written for her daughter Hana.  Rin had moved out of the palace to live with Shippo when Hana was still in her womb.  When Hana was born Rin was there to help with the delivery. 

Hana had been a strange pup, different from the rest of her children.  She'd been weak, and fragile.  At the time Kagome had thought it'd be a passing thing, because Inu blood isn't weak or easily overcome.  Over the years Rin and Hana had kept in touch by letter since Rin lived inconveniently far away.

Lord Sesshomaru,

                I know this is far from the normal way of communication, but there is something that I desire to address that I feel is important.  Winter months are soon upon us.  I wish to meet you at some point for there are some things that I would like to give Rin to entertain her indoors during these harsh, snow filled months.  I also fear that our enemies conspire against us, I have some things I'd like to discuss with you.

Respecfully,

Higurashi Kagome

Kagome stopped as she handed the little piece of aged parchment to curious hands.  Her first letter ever written to her mate was now in their youngest pup's hands as little emerald eyes examined the letter.  Hana lifted her face to study her mother quietly as Kagome pulled out the next item in the envelope.

Miko,

      While your form of communication is inconvenient and ineffective, it is intriguing.  This Sesshomaru agrees to meet with you for the purpose of receiving items for little Rin's amusement.  At this moment, even as this one writes to you, this one must fight the glistening puppy eyes from Rin as she begs to accompany this one to meet you.

     As for our enemies, they have schemed for time long before your missive.  This one agrees to meet to discuss what you might know.  This one will be in the meadow of the well in two weeks’ time from the unseen moon.

Lord of the West, Taisho Sesshomaru

Kagome finished reading the letter to Hana and also relinquished that letter to her curious little pup.  Though the letters were meant as a way of telling a story, Kagome was enjoying the trip down memory lane.  She was able to recall the night she'd received the letter.  She's smiled like a little school girl as she studied the TaiYokai's perfect handwriting.  It had amused her in the fact that he'd pushed himself to such a pretense of perfection.

The next thing to appear from the envelope startled Kagome.  They were pages of her journal that she'd kept at the time.

    Today I received a response from Sesshomaru.  He's agreed to meet me, and I can't wait to see if he brings Rin along or not.  In about six days I'll be meeting him in the clearing the well is in.  I've never spoken to him before about the well, but I think he already knows my secret.  I fear that he believes that I lied when I said that I had some things that worried me about our enemies.  However I've gotten information from a very reliable source, someone who is our ally that must pretend to be Naraku's ally.

    Kagura and Kanna have been watching Naraku's movements for me.  They've informed me that he intends to strike the West at one of its weakest points, at their weakest time.  He intends to attack InuKimi when she leaves the fortress to fulfill the ritual of Kra.  Though I don't know what that ritual is about, I know that it leaves the performer weak for some time afterwards.  InuKimi runs the West with Sesshomaru, she does what he cannot while he's out protecting the lands.

    I wish to help him protect his mother from the vile being, and that means informing him of the plan.  I fear however that any letter I send him may be looked at by unworthy eyes, so I must tell him this in person.  I hope he'll believe me, he's lost so much because of Naraku already, I'd rather he not lose his mother as well.

Though Kagome was shell-shocked that this piece of her journal still existed, she was even more shocked as she read it aloud to her pup.  Her face lit red as she recalled what she wrote the days before receiving the letter and the days after.  Now being very cautious she reached into the envelope and pulled out the next thing.  It was a photograph with writing on the back.

        Rin with her new coloring book and other items.  In the background:  Sesshomaru, Jaken, Ah-Un, and Kagome.

Kagome smiled at the picture before handing that as well to her daughter.  Kagome smiled as Hana stared at the parchment before lifting her gaze to her mother.  "It's a picture, Hana.  Rin is carrying a small backpack with several toys sticking out.  Behind her there is Jaken, Ah-Un, as well as Daddy and Mommy."  Hana slowly nodded her head before she turned towards the envelope and silently requested Kagome to continue.  The next item was another piece of her journal, no surprise now.

   Today I met with Sesshomaru, and yes, he did have Rin with him.  She was so excited to see the stuff I had for her that it was adorable.  While Sesshomaru was silent the whole time I explained to Rin what each item was, I noticed he was always studying me.  I assume he was trying to figure out my real reason for giving such things to the girl.

    Once she'd seen everything and she wanted to see Shippo we headed back to the village.  Inuyasha was (is) currently with Kikyo.  I didn't (don't) have to worry about what his reaction would (will) be towards his half-brother.  As the children started to run down the lane towards their favorite play area, Sesshomaru pulled me aside so we could talk.  We entered Kaede's hut, Sango and Miroku were in there.  Because I'd told them what I'd be talking with Sesshomaru about they left the hut to keep an eye on the kids for me.

                I really didn't know if he'd believe me, but I told him everything.  Everything from how and why I knew I could trust Kagura and Kanna, and what they'd told me.  He was silent the entire time I explained why I was worried.  He'd then surprised me by asking why this included me.  I told him I didn't understand.  He then inquired why I'd said 'conspiring against us' if Naraku was planning on attacking the West, not my group.

                I tried to lie and say I miswrote what I meant.  But Sesshomaru saw right through it and with his normal icy glare commanded that I tell him what I had withheld.  This is an attack against me in two ways, Naraku is aware of the feelings I carry for Sesshomaru.  I love him, but I didn't tell him that.  So he's attacking my biggest weakness, the subject of my love.  The second way is that he plans to attack my group after he's attacked Sesshomaru's mother.  That'd leave us without our strongest ally in the onslaught of chaos.  This was the reason I told Sesshomaru.  He believed it to be the truth, but I think he knows that I withheld something else.

                Because of this information that I gave Sesshomaru, he's decided it'd be best to join our groups together.  This will make certain that he'll be able to protect us no matter what happens, and we'll all be able to travel with InuKimi to keep her safe from the heinous hanyo.  I left a message with Kaede, and we left to the Western Palace.  The ritual will happen in three weeks’ time, Sesshomaru wants to have everyone trained and prepared for the battle we will face.

Kagome grimaced as she remembered Inuyasha's reaction to the message and what had happened when he'd caught up with the group.  It had ended with Kagome in tears, Sesshomaru protecting her from Inuyasha, and Inuyasha in a coma for the next three days.  While it had served as the main thing to convince Sesshomaru to take the pack's alpha position, it hadn't been pleasant.

Miko,

                I understand that you have refused to talk to anyone.  As you have avoided my attempts to speak with you I hope you will read this letter.  This one hopes that you would consider attending the ritual with me.  It is tradition to attend with a female pack mate, Rin is too young.  Don't think of it as your duty, or a job.  It is acceptable should you wish to refuse.

Taisho Sesshomaru

Kagome smiled as she reread the letter.  She'd been in denial of what had happened after Sesshomaru had become alpha.  He'd pulled her aside and in total non-Sesshomaru fashion, had talked plenty.  He'd explained what it meant to be the alpha female in a yokai pack, even if she wasn't the alpha's female.

He'd told her that she'd amazed him with her instinctual following of the majority of her responsibilities as such a female.  Though apparently there had been things that were lacking from her actions.  She shouldn't let herself be pushed around by anyone, not even the male alpha.  She didn't tend to Shippo the way she should, and Kirara needed to be able to talk with her.

Hana's hands reached forward, startling Kagome out of her thoughts.  With a gentle shush she pulled the third to last item out and read it.

     I understand that I shouldn't expect a thrilling change in what's happening in this search for jewel shards, but I'm not sure I can stop myself from expecting this.  We reached the great Western Palace four days ago.  But I'm getting restless just sitting around being the gossip of all the people here.

                InuKimi's been a wonderful hostess.  She's a perfect example of a Lady.  Other than her perfect manners I've found a kindred spirit within her.  She's a female of great strength who still has a gentleness about her, despite what everyone else (Sesshomaru, Jaken, Myouga, and Inuyasha) might say.

                Her amusing pranks on those that constantly annoy her have kept my boredom from driving me insane.  Perhaps Sesshomaru will regret joining our packs, InuKimi seems quite fond with the idea of little puppy eared gran- pups underfoot.  I wonder if he's overheard some of the things InuKimi's said...  that might explain why he talks even less with me now... even after I'd accepted to attend the ritual with him.

With a small smile given to her from Hana Kagome couldn’t help but recall how she favored the idea of little pups like one would a special dream.  It had been an idea she’d thought for several hours on her own, but it had been InuKimi who had mentioned it first.

Hana’s hand stretched out and grabbed the sleeve of Kagome’s shirt.  With a small giggle she reached towards the envelope, which elicited curiosity in Kagome.  What could be in there that had her daughter’s vivid interest?

Reaching in, she pulled out a piece of folded paper.  Kagome unfolded it and a ring fell out, she quickly stopped its fall and read the little note.

       Kagome while you sat by the fire you seemed so far away as you gazed at the stars.  Under your breath you sang a song which you called a love song.  You’ve captured my interest, but I find myself wondering what your own view of me is.

Kagome’s breath caught in her throat as she reread the note.  It had happened after the ritual had taken place.  Naraku had attacked the day after, for even he wasn’t without knowledge of the ritual.  It was a ritual performed by the Ladies of the Lands, it was meant as a protection ritual over everyone and everything in the lands.  But there was something greater behind it.

The preparation that happened before was the main reason for it.  It was a simple gathering of the highest demons to meet as friends and allies without the burden of court and manners.  It was an evening of festivities, frolicking young, and a sincere appreciation of life.

                I’ve found that Sesshomaru hides more imperfection behind his mask of indifference than many might think.  I’ve had the honor of getting to know him more as we’ve been able to build our friendship and mutual trust.  Now when I see him get angry, or see him glare I’m unafraid that something will come about that will harm me or the kids.

                But as it’s been nearly a year since our packs joined I can no longer lie to myself about the feelings I have for this male.  I love him, but more than I love any other being.  I still love Inuyasha, and I always will, but I love him as a brother and dear friend.  I don’t look forward to the day I have to tell him that I don’t intend to mate him.

                He’s been talking about the plans for the future as the final battle with Naraku nears, and I fear he’s in the delusion that we will mate.  He’s been speaking of it like it’s a concrete fact.  I fear the worst, for Sesshomaru has already, in his own lordship like manner, spoken of his own desire to have me make a permanent residence in his palace.

Kagome handed that journal entry over to her daughter as well as she pulled the very last item from the envelope.  It was a fragment of a scroll that had been part of the library in the palace.  She wondered how it had ever survived.

Before she got the chance to read it there was a knock at the door and both Hana and Kagome looked up and smiled at the person who stood there.  Kagome lifted Hana into her arms and left the room with him before heading out into the gardens.  It was custom to watch the first snow fall.

A breeze swept through the open window and the scroll piece fluttered to the ground.

                 As Lady of the West, I’ve found my winter Wonderland.