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The KFC Hour by Walter205

Origin of the Samuel McButterbacon Snack Stick

 I don't own Inuyasha, nor will I profit from it.


"This is the Kagome Fun Cooking Hour and joining us today are the duo of Sesshomaru and his mate, Kagome. As we welcome our audience to today's episode, we'll be taking a quick look into the pairing for the new viewers out there. A most unusual mating, Sesshomaru Yamamoto is a full blooded demon, while the former Kagome Higurashi turned Kagome Yamamoto is not only a full blooded human, but a miko at that. But not only has the mating turned out well, Kagome is as can be seen heavily pregnant with no complications that either has shared with us thus far."

"As we progress over the next several weeks, we will be covering new dishes conjured out of a hormone infused miko carrying demon pups, varying from possible snacks and desserts, to large and full main courses. Without further ado, here are our hosts, Sesshomaru and Kagome!"

The curtain parted, revealing the kitchen stage. Sesshomaru stood dressed in his usual cooking garb, a stylish white tuxedo outfit with a sharp white hat, the latter donning an orange feather, with low cut glasses adorning his face. Kagome on the other hand stood wearing her old middle school uniform, but a carefully tailored version of it to suite her Maternity needs.

"Today we will be cooking whatever my mate pleases, so let's get the scoop from Kagome as to what we'll be fixing. Kagome?" asked Sesshomaru.

"Hmmm, well, the little hormone hordes are conjuring up visions of bacon, dipped in a butter batter, coated with brown sugar, then deep fried to perfection. Oh, and with deep fried vanilla ice cream on top of it, thanks to your little 'scoop' comment," chirped his mate.

"Very well then. We have a wide verity of ingredients on hand and should have everything we need to make the dish...," began Sesshomaru.

"You'd better," Kagome interrupted with a barely audible whisper....

" let's gather them up and begin."

Sesshomaru put his words to action and went diving into the pantry and the fridge, coming out with all of the ingredients needed; one package of Samuel brand Center Cut Bacon, one box of Pixie Crystals Brown Sugar, one package of Public brand Butter, and one pint of Red bell brand Vanilla Ice Cream. Finally, he laid one bottle of Disco Canola Oil on the counter. That was promptly poured into the deep fryer before the latter was activated.

"First, let's begin by easily melting the butter in the microwave inside a large bowl. The four sticks we're using equals about two cups worth of butter. Don't set the timer too high, as we want the butter soft, but not completely melted for the best results," began Sesshomaru. A chime sounded from the microwave, signaling it was done. He removed the butter and saw that it was indeed as he wanted it to be; very soft, but not completely melted.

"Now then, let's add the bacon, pre-separating the strips from each other, into the bowl, before using our gloved hands to mix them around in the batter until fully coated." For added emphasis, Sesshomaru pulled one of the bacon strips out of the bowl. The normally red-pinkish strip was a solid yellow with the butter hanging on it.

"Now then, transfer the strips one at a time into the bowl of brown sugar, and coat until no more yellow is apparent." Again, he lifted up a strip, to show it covered in brown and white sugar crystals. A short time later, all of the bacon was done, left lying in the bowl of brown sugar.

"Now, it is time to finish our works of creation. Go ahead and add the bacon strips into the deep fryer, and go ahead and start taking small scoops of ice cream and adding them into the deep fryer as well. After just a little time, here we are, the bacon and ice cream are both done," said Sesshomaru. Several minutes later, the cooking was done, with the deep fryer turned off.

He presented the tray of snacks to Kagome, who grabbed a smaller plate and put two pieces of bacon strips on it before presenting it back to Sesshomaru.

"Here honey, would you please eat a couple so I don't feel as much a pig for eating it all?" she asked nice and sweetly.

Sighing, Sesshomaru accepted the proffered plate from her.

Sniffing one of the sticks hesitantly, he took a bit from the first one. Eyes opening wide, he quickly gobbled up the entire bacon stick. A dog demon was still a dog demon, and a piece of bacon was still a piece of bacon after all. But what the other ingredients did to him....

His demon aura swirled about him, his thoughts and focuses turned inwards. In his mind, he imagined himself on a beautiful green plain, grass blowing in the breeze, a herd of cows, prime for the slaughter for their delicious steaks, grazing amongst the grass. Stalking through the grass, he was ready to pounce on them, to feast upon their delicious flesh, but just when he was ready, the image fled from his mind.

Coming back to reality, he quickly snapped up and devoured the second bacon stick.

Once again he found himself upon the plain, ready to strike. He struck out from the grass, the herd of cows turning tail and running. He went after them, eager for the hunt. But the cows kept getting further and further away from him. Eventually he tripped over himself, having stepped on something that hurt. Looking down after getting to his knees, he saw that he'd tripped over his own stomach. Watching with dread and fascination, his stomach grew and he slowly transformed before finally, he too was a cow. Letting out a mournful moo, Sesshomaru watched in his mind as his transformed self went to join with the herd.

Snapping back to reality, he eyed his empty plate with contempt. The messages his mind had delivered to him made it abundantly clear what further consumption of the treat would bring; while it might be tasty when first eaten, over time it would be very very bad for him, and too much consumption would bring certain ruin upon him.

Hearing a smacking sound, Sesshomaru turned to see his mate cleaning her lips as her tray clattered into the sink. She'd devoured the remaining two dozen bacon strips and dozen scoops of ice cream in the time that he'd eaten the two and reminisced about what eating the food meant. Another image came into his mind as he stared of her, that of a pig, large and growing larger, eating whatever slop was thrown into its trough until it was all gone.

That image brought a chuckle to his lips. Unfortunately for him, pigs aren't mind readers, while his mate apparently was. She was glaring daggers at him as his eyes rose from her expansive stomach to her face. The back of his neck broke into a cold clammy sweat as the tapes stopped rolling, signaling the end to the episode.

"Couch," she whispered to him as she pranced off the set. Sighing, Sesshomaru turned and dutifully followed in her wake.


INUYASHA © Rumiko Takahashi/Shogakukan • Yomiuri TV • Sunrise 2000
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