Ultimate Challenge by KD Heart

Chapter 1

A/N: Once upon a time, I started writing a fic called The Ultimate Challenge which was supposed to be a fun piece of crack and then I ran out of ideas for it (that and it kept getting too serious for crack). Here it is again, this time with intentional inconsistency.

Disclaimer: Inuyasha and all the characters in the series were created by the wonderful Rumiko Takahashi and I own nothing.

Ultimate Challenge

Chapter 1

The story that follows is  one of love and loss and zany schemes, but mostly zany schemes… and reincarnation… and hypnosis… and a great deal of coincidence… but mostly zany schemes.

Our story begins in the ridiculously tall building that houses 4DTV[1] in a land that looks a lot like present day Japan but is mostly an anachronistic[2] and anatopic[3] approximation of it, born of watching too much anime. But we digress.

On one of the upper floors, in an office that looks dimensionally transcendental[4], four young men are taking a break from work. I say ‘break’, when actually ‘work’ was what they did when they needed a break from messing around. These four were known to those who worked with them and to those that didn’t as ‘The Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse’[5] and, despite their reputation, were actually working there because they deserved to be – they were the best at what they did and, unfortunately to those around them, they knew it all too well (that and one of them was the owner’s illegitimate son).

Let’s start introducing the cast, shall we? The silver-haired young man currently bouncing a ball against the only office wall not made of glass is Inuyasha. At 23, he was one of the best reporters 4DTV boasted with, even if he didn’t look it. Despite being the owner’s illegitimate son, he had earned his position through hard work and talent and by running against his father’s wishes, who would have preferred it if both his sons had gone into Law. Wearing a red t-shirt, jeans, and a red baseball cap with the station’s logo, he looks nothing like the professional we’ve been describing, but even in the real world looks aren’t everything. Unknown to him, he was also the reincarnation of a dog-demon (half-demon, really) from Feudal Japan who had wanted to use the fabled Jewel of Four Souls to become, alternately, full-demon, human (out of love), full-demon again (out of a broken heart and desire to live up to expectations) and human, again (after falling in love with another miko). It didn’t work out as well as he had imagined.

Leaning against the window and looking quiet and pensive, we have Kouga, Inuyasha’s distant cousin, constant rival in love and star cameraman of 4DTV. He is also the reincarnation of Inuyasha’s old rival, a wolf demon, who had also been involved in the quest for the Jewel and the fight for a certain moko’s affections. In his current incarnation, he was a tall young man, with long, dark hair pulled back in a ponytail, about the same age as his cousin. He was a sucker for extreme sports and didn’t back down from stupid stunts in order to get a better shot[6].

The third member of the group, lying lazily on the couch while browsing an… interesting magazine, was Miroku – 25 and the official pervert of the group. He was one of the directors there and the reincarnation of a wondering monk whose hands had wondered just as much in his previous existence as they did in this and had also been involved in the fate of the Sacred Jewel.

The last member of the group was Hojo, a young computer nerd working as an intern for the summer. Shy and incredibly dedicated, he is nearly nothing like his friends but don’t let that surprise you. Within days, he had already managed to get every single computer in the building to depend on him, bringing the entire IT team under his control and securing himself a job in the future. He was also able to find any needle in the haystack that is the Internet and was currently looking for a very specific specialty web site for Miroku. In a previous life, he had been a regular high school student and, probably, the only person not directly involved with the Jewel.

Aside from being very good at what they did and a knack for getting into trouble, the four had another thing in common – incredibly lousy luck in love. Inuyasha had been dumped two weeks before the wending by his high school sweetheart, Koga, though loyal as a dog, usually drove away any potential love interest with his possessiveness and Hojo was too shy to even ask a girl out. At the other end of the scale, Miroku was always bragging with a new conquest (probably because not one woman had the patience to deal with all his kinks and his wondering eyes). At the moment, all four were also nursing broken hearts which was deemed a bad omen by all their coworkers.

Enter Tarou Taisho, Inuyasha’s father and owner of 4DTV. After two weeks of sifting through complaints about the behavior of the Four Horsemen, some nagging from his lover and even more complaints about the lack of activity from everyone’s favorite foursome, he finally decided to take action and bring them out of their blues (and, hopefully, teach them a lesson or two about responsibility). He knew their weaknesses better than anyone and also knew how to motivate them. There was one thing he had never let them do since they started work under him – allow them to work on a project together. Not just any project, it was Inuyasha’s chance to shine as a writer, Miroku’s to unleash his charms on even more unsuspecting females, Kouga’s moment on the other side of the camera and Hojo’s to work his magic in the special effects department. All he asked in return was so insignificant, yet so nearly impossible, it would probably keep them out of his way for at least a year. The first step in his plan was to get them interest, which he managed by simply walking into his son’s office and clearing his throat.

“I want you to get married,” he announced.

The reaction was nearly instantaneous – all four, dropping  their respective activities (Inuyasha quite literally), collectively burst into a fit of laughter that nearly left them gasping for air.

“But I am a reasonable man and won’t ask the impossible of you.”

“Than why did you bring it up?” Inuyasha asked, finally catching his breath.

“Because I couldn’t find a better intro.”

“An intro to what?” Miroku asked, raising an eyebrow.

“I want to make you an offer you can’t refuse,” the older man said in a devious tone, guaranteed to grab their interest.

“Which is?” Hojo asked, putting his glasses back on.

“What if I let you make that movie you’ve always wanted to make?” Tarou asked.

“What’s the catch?” Kouga asked, suspicious.

“You get steady girlfriends by my birthday in two months time.”

The four young men erupted into another fit of laughter.

“I think it’s reasonable enough,” he insisted, his face schooled into mask that perfectly hid his amusement.

“You might forget that our problem isn’t getting the girl,” Miroku pointed out.

“Yeah,” Kouga jumped in. “It’s keeping the girl.”

“Talk for yourselves,” Hojo grumbled.

“All you need, Hojo, is practice,” the older man said amiably. “And that’s just what you should think of this as. Miroku, you are aware that there is a Former Girlfriends of Miroku club going on, right?”

Miroku nodded proudly.

“Well, you should stop it before all my female employees end up joining!” he threatened, genuinely annoyed. “As for Kouga, you’re so damn possessive, I doubt you’ll find anyone with the patience to keep you, but it will be damn funny watching you try.”

“You’re enjoying this a bit too much, aren’t you?” Kouga grumbled.

“And my darling son,” he said, sweeping the Inuyasha up in an inescapable embrace. “You’ve got to get over her and stop plotting weird actions that are nearly impossible to recount afterwards!”

“Did you take all your meds this morning?” the young man asked, half smothered.

“I’ll give you some time to think about it,” he said, releasing his son and turning to leave. “But I doubt you’ll catch me in the mood to approve that movie later.”

The four watched him turn, already mourning the death of their chance. There was no way they’d take any deal offered by the big dog[7].

And then he stopped.

“Oh, and there’s also a million $ on the line if you manage to hook Sesshoumaru up,” he said casually, then left the office.

“Hook up Sesshoumaru?” Hojo mouthed.

“A million $?” Miroku continued.

“A steady girlfriend?” Kouga gulped.

“You do realize we’ll have to take the challenge now?” Inuyasha asked.

The other three nodded. The idea of getting Sesshoumaru to go out with a woman opened up so many new possibilities.

~*~*~

[1] The author thought it would be funny to name the station 4 Dogs TV because she is generally under the impression that she is funny. She isn’t. However, the name sort of works if you consider that the characters are reincarnations of the characters from the anime Inuyasha and that there are, in fact, four dogs working there (if you include Kouga who is a wolf, therefore a Canidae)*

* The author also thinks she’s very funny by overdoing it with the footnotes.  She isn’t. 

[2] Misplaced in time

[3] Misplaced in space

[4] That’s “bigger on the inside”.

[5] Due to an incident involving some horses, RCMP uniforms, the American Embassy and lots of noodles.

[6] Like jumping down a bungee cord during a bank robbery turned hostage situation in order to film the cops as they were finally getting the bad guys – it landed him a night in jail for interfering in police business. 

[7] Incidentally, Tarou Taisho* had also been involved with the Jewel of Four Souls in a previous life where he had also been Inuyasha's father.

* This had been the first version of the character's name the author had ran across in fan fiction and is probably using it as a tribute to that.