Shattered Heart by Irihi-Chan

Leaving...

Chapter One

Her fist clenched around the silver chain as she ran. Confusion clouded her mind. Crystal blue eyes scanned the crowds of youkai and ningen, searching. A flash of silver ran past her and she followed, trusting her instinct to lead her to him. 'Sesshoumaru...?'

A large crowd was gathering around the figure she just saw. As a petite woman, it was easy for her to squeeze and weave her way through the party of flesh. As she reached the center, Kagome stopped dead in her tracks and stared at the scene before her. Voices ranged from left to right in her ears, but she could not begin to comprehend what they were saying.

"New fiance!"

"New York!"

"Rushed engagment..."

"Nooo! Sesshoumaru-sama!"

'Iie... What's going on? Sesshoumaru would never... Sess—' Kagome rubbed her eyes and pinched her cheek hard several time. No matter how hard she pinched herself, the scene wouldn't change. Her heart skipped a beat with realization and she was certain that if she had listened more carefully, she could her the crystalline sound of it shattering.

Sesshoumary was murmuring softly to the woman in his arms, who was smiling widely and waving politely at the screaming crowd. With hair of sea-green foam that reaches her thigh in waves, matching narrowed eyes, and tall regal figure, the woman was absolutely beautiful. Although she did not have any markings, one cannot mistaken her for a ningen. Ningen women doesn't have such moon-kissed translucent skin that brings out dark, kissable, berry lips. Lips that, Kagome's stomach plummeted, Sesshoumaru tenderly placed an endearment on.

Kagome's discomfort turned into anxiety when she noticed Sesshoumaru offering a cordial arm to the woman next to him. They headed towards the gateway. Her hands and feet were still frozen from shock, her mouth opened and moved but no sound came out. 'No! Sesshoumaru, please don't leave me!'

Instantly, as though he has heard her silent plea through the throngs of bystanders, his head turned and he stared at her. The cold fury in his eyes flashed for a moment until it was replaced with his famed look of indifference. Kagome balked. She had not seen that gaze directed at her for more than a year ago. Sesshoumaru turned his back to her and continued on his way.

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 ​

The lone silhouette of a broken woman stood motionless as the crowd begant o disassemble. Time seemed to have stopped entirely for her. She could not see the blurred faces and bodies rushing back and forth to their original destination. She could not hear the quickening footsteps, hushed voices, and sounds of life from the busy airport. For her, life and time seem to have came to a sudden halt altogether.

​​Jealousy... An emotion quite rare flowed like white lava through her veins. She was a content creature who found happiness in the simple joys of life. Until this moment, Higurashi Kagome did not know the meaning of envy as it swallowed her very soul. Sesshoumaru was hers. She closed her eyes, trying to remember the warmth of his affections. Affections that are now directed to someone else. 

Self-condemnation... Maybe... If only she was more beautiful. With wavy hair colour of the ocean, perhaps? Or if she was a bit taller? Or if she was more sophisticated? Maybe if she had been born something that was not ningen. Maybe then, Sesshoumaru might take another glance at her.

Betrayal... There was no other words for the pain that entered her. Despite warnings from her family and friends, Kagome, fool that she was, had given him everything. Had it not been enough? Had it meant nothign to him? How could Sesshoumaru, her beloved, be so cruel? 'Have you forgotten that cruelty is his nature?'' a little voice in the back of her head said, mocking.

'Oh, of course.' Kagome shook her head, raven tendrils fall like a curtain over her bitter smile. Still in disbelief with her ignorance and lack of judgement, she walked away, wandering aimlessly. Her feet took her to a deserted restroom corridor. Her body automatically slumped against the marble wall as wretched knees gave away to her uncommonly fatigue body. She slide down, less than gracefully, to a pile of broken bones on the floor.

A familiar pair of Italian leather shoes came into view. She twitched and her gaze rose with the wild beating of her heart. His long legs were crossed and his hands were shoved in his pockets to hide those deadly claws. Sesshoumaru was leaning against the opposite wall, the epitome of grace and elegance even in such a casual position.

Kagome clutch the wall to lift herself up, although she felt as though her legs would collapse under the pressure.  They were both silent, both lost in their musings, as looked at each other, oblivious to the activities happening outside of the invisible barrier. Both had so much to say, yet, none was spoken.

Annoyed and irritated, he finally broke the dreadful silence. "Speak if you must, human. This Sesshoumarudoes not have all day."

She stiffened at his cold tone; it had been so long since she had heard him talk to her like this...soimpersonal and uncaring. The fact that he had addressed her as human in this point of their relationship was all the more confusing to her than it already is. How could this be? What had caused him to change so suddenly? Depressed at the unending questions rampaging through her, she inquired the most bothersome one of all. "W-who was she?"

"Amusing you should ask." He shrugged carelessly. "That was my fiancée."

She gasped, feeling the blow more acutely than if he had actually hit her. "Excuse me?"

"Are you deaf or just a fool? She is my fiancée, my intended."

"I-I... I don't understand−"

"This conversation with you is, in your inadequate list of vocabulary, boring." He interrupted. "You've wasted enough of my precious time, human. This Sesshoumaru shall be leaving."

A small, delicate hand gently tugged at his sleeve, causing him to look back in her tear-stained face. The moment molten gold clashed with ocean blue, they were both lost. Fear spread throughout her body as she gazed into those expressionless sun-kissed eyes, searching for the faintest trail of hope. Yet, all she could see were his eyes, endless pools of hard amber...piercing and frozen.

"Doushite, Sesshoumaru? Why are you doing this to me?"

He gently pried her hands off him, never breaking their eye contact. "You are no more to me. Face the truth,ningen: This Sesshoumaru does not love you."

Those words seem to echo for all eternity within her. Everything they've been through, everything he'd promised before... were all lies. An immense hatred strained to be unleashed. She had been nothing but a game, a puzzle... an entertainment for him. How could she have not remembered what he had said before he started courting her?

"You truly are an intriguing creature, Higurashi."

And now that he had his filled of her, she is worthless to him.

She wanted to kill him. She wanted to bury him alive; chop him up into pieces and feed him to savage wolves; forever scar that pretty face of his so he can never walk outside his mansion. She wanted to hate him.

Her barely breathing heart gave a twitch... knowing it was quite the opposite.

Slowly, she looked up, giving him a broken smile. "I hope you're happy with your choice."

Then she turned on her heel and walked away.

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Swinging the bottle of sake around, her body moved to the smooth jazz playing in the background. The world was spinning at top speed around her as the alcohol invaded her mind. Dizzy and exhausted, she crashed onto the fine mahogany dresser, scattering bottles of perfume, make-ups, and hair products everywhere.

Gradually, she lifts her head up, looking into the mirror in front of her.

Her eyes were red and puffy and her nose was slightly runny, due to the large amount of tears she had spent earlier on. The soft light from the only lamp in the room made the wetness on her cheeks seem to shimmer. In reality, she was even more beautiful than she was, but Kagome thought differently.

"You're so ugly." She told the creature in the mirror. "You're so fucking ugly and worthless! That's why he doesn't want you!"

The creature in the mirror nodded its approval.

"Who do you think you are? You're nothing! NOTHING!" she screamed. "You don't deserve him!"

The more she looked into the mirror, the more she hated what it reflected. Herself.

Scrunching her hands into a fist, she raised it above her head, and strikes the hideous object.

SMASH!!!

Tiny piece of glass flew everywhere, some injecting itself into her flesh. Ignoring the painful stings in hands,Kagome picked up the near-by chair and flung it at the already damaged mirror.

"You are so stupid! He only fucking used you, baka!" She slumped on the floor, the lush, white carpet now doting with her blood, and sob.

Glancing around their large apartment, more painful memories were brought back. She sniffed, not wanting another breakdown.

Everything here reminded her of him. Those evenings they would spend making dinner together in the kitchen; the cozy nights, huddling together on the couch, watching all sorts of movies; the nights' passion they share in bed. Everything.

Sesshoumaru was everything to her...

Kagome pick herself up, she walked into the bathroom.

Her heart...

Pale hands, dripping with blood, as she reached out to opened the cabinet behind the mirror.

Her mind...

Finally she found the small bottle of pills.

Her soul...

Grabbing the bottle of water on the nightstand, she popped several pills into her mouth and swallowed down with water. Kagome climb on the king-sized bed and lay down, nuzzling her nose on his pillow. The masculine scent assaulted her nose as she felt her world falling.

Then everything was pitched black...

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Translation

onegai - please

Iie - no

youkai - demon

ningen - human

nani - what?

doushite - why?

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AUTHOR'S CORNER

I wrote this story in 2007, updated 2 chapters, quitted for 4 years, then reuploaded. Now I just edited the beginning and reuploaded again after 6 months. Yes, I am a complicated person. For those who just read the story, enjoy! For those who read the original version and find me annoying for keep on rewritting what was already written instead of writting new materials, I'm sorry. 

I just kind tweaked it, didn't change the plot-line at all, actually o_O. Anyways, I'm not going to rewrite Chapter Two, since it's already to my perference, and I'm editing Chapter Three right now!

You didn't ask and probably wouldn't care, but college, work,and life has just been busy... 

Anyways, please review! 

Strawberry and mangos from

Irihi-chan