Tea Party of the Villainous by emertheawesome

Enter Death

A/N: This will probably only be like 5- 10 drabbles, all of which will be complete crack. Sorry, the idea just bashed me in the head and I couldn't resist. It will either be SessxKagxNaraku, or just SessxKag (review with your opinion?). I really can't decide. By the way, this may come as a surprise, but I DO NOT own Inuyasha. Go figure.

Tea Party of the Villainous

When Kagome died it wasn't actually that painful.

Actually, it was extremely painful. The Shikon Miko--after fighting youkai, defending her friends, and defeating one of the most notorious baddies ever--died by gravity. Well, sort of. Kagome was innocently crossing the street when the car (a fucking Toyota, dammit) hit her going about 40 miles per hour. This quite possibly could have been survivable if she hadn't gone flying and crashed into a stop sign.

It was an extremely undignified death.

Of course, once her brain, lungs, and heart shut down, Kagome was feeling quite nice. After she had bled out and the sounds of sirens faded her death was pretty much peaceful. Of course, Kagome should not have been surprised that death would be hugely shocking. After all, hadn't her life been one big, nasty surprise after another? Why should Death be any different?

So a few minutes later (app. three min and 23 seconds) Kagome was plopped down in a grungy office where a gruff looking creature (which faintly resembled a warthog with some human and snake mixed in) scribbled in a yellow ledger.

"Um," Kagome had stuttered. "Where am I?"

The creature looked at her with a flat stare. "You're dead," he stated tightly. "Now wait your turn while we find a place for you to live."

At this point Kagome was completely confounded. "Uh...live? Shouldn't I be...I don't know... reincarnated or something?"

The creature snorted and set his pencil down. "You sure are dumb for a miko. You've reached Nirvana, missy. Now sit down before I kick you out."

Kagome stumbled to one of the plastic, stained chairs and stared blankly at the peeling wall. Her first impression of Nirvana was that it completely sucked. Things began looking up when they stationed her at a quaint little cottage surrounded by a field of daisies and other assortments of wildflowers. They had even given her a little telly that she could watch real life out of. She saw Sango and Miroku's children running playfully around the village; she saw Souta graduating from high school; and she saw Inuyasha accepted into society with Kikyo as his wife. She missed them--being dead left her a little lonely--but she was content knowing how happy they were.