What do you want? by iloveprettysilverhair

What do you want?

Title: What do you want?
Author: iloveprettysilverhair
Genre: Romance
Word Count: 2,313
Rating: R
AU/Canon: Post Canon-ish
A/N: Written for Ebony Silks week 85 theme: Panic.  I wrote this...about a year ago. I suppose it was time to post it ;)


Kagome's eyes darted behind her when she once again felt that she was being watched.  She had never had a problem when walking back to her apartment before, she lived in a nice area with lots of streetlights and emergency call boxes every few hundred feet for reassurance.  Her classes had run late before, resulting in her walking home in the dark on a couple of occasions, so it wasn't an out-of-the-ordinary experience for her.

She was well adept in martial arts, a year after the well had closed she had needed something to keep her mind occupied and found solace in the swift movements and power that Kenpo had offered her.  After nearly three years she was well on the way to earning herself a black belt, so she had never been afraid of not being able to defend herself.

Until tonight.

Her steps quickened as a sliver of panic started to set in as she finally was able to faintly hear the sound of another set of footsteps aside from her own.  The streets seemed to be oddly deserted, like everyone had known it wasn't safe to venture out that night except for her.  She finally started to get a grip on her emotions when the streetlamp above her flickered off and she looked on in horror down the street as the rest of the lights followed suit.  She knew then that this was not a normal human being she was dealing with.

Deciding that she was not going to be snuck up on, Kagome quickly turned around to face her stalker.  Eyes widened when she saw that she was very much alone, not a soul on the sidewalk besides herself.

“Get a grip, Kagome.  You've been reading one too many murder-mysteries.”

Taking a few deep breaths to calm her frazzled nerves, Kagome turned back around to continue her walk home.  She gasped when she came face to face with a dark figure, not five feet in front of her.

“Who are you?” she said forcefully, hoping whoever it was didn't hear the quiver in her voice.  She gulped when she made out a fanged smile and unconsciously took a step back.

A deep timber filled the silence and she immediately recognized the voice. 

“I thought my self the only survivor left from those times,” he drawled out slowly.

Kagome steeled her resolve and set her jaw in a tight line.  “That was a long time ago.  I've moved on, and so should you.”

She brushed passed him and continued on her path, trying diligently to ignore the imposing figure.  Chancing a glance behind her, Kagome sighed gratefully when she saw that he had left.  It had taken a lot of therapy and good friends to get past the heartache she had felt when the well rejected her.  She had finally begun to live again, and then he decided to show up.    

Hands in tight fists, Kagome stomped her foot.  “This is just a minor setback, nothing to get worked up over.  Just pretend like it didn't happen.”

Mental pep-talk over, Kagome once again turned back the way she was going.  She screeched loudly when she was met with golden eyes trained on her.  “Don't do that!  Are you trying to give me a heart attack?!”

“Can you understand how it feels to hide who you really are to everyone around you?  To have no one who knows of the demon I used to be?” he said dodging her own question.

Kagome pursed her lips and looked him square in the eye.  “Yes, as a matter of fact, I do know what it's like to have to hide my true self.  Do you think I go around telling people that I used to travel back in time?  I'd be in a loony bin quicker than I could blink.”

Sesshoumaru stepped closer to her and Kagome backed up, trying to keep her distance.  “I left that behind nearly three years ago.  Please, leave me alo-”

He had her by the neck and pressed again a building wall before she could finish her request.  “Still know how to command attention I see,” she said sardonically. 

Instead of tightening his grip like she thought he would, he smirked and let out a soft chuckle.  “Tell me priestess, were you always this amusing?”

“What do you want from me, Sesshoumaru?  Why can't you just leave me be; I was perfectly fine forgetting about that past.”

“Were you?”

“Y-yes...”

“Hm.  Lies do not become you, priestess.  You may spend all your time running from your past, but I promise this: it will catch up to you.  Forgetting it will not help, you cannot change the past in the present.  When it catches you, you will feel alone, vulnerable, and  question everything you have done since then, and wonder...”

His grip loosened around her throat and Kagome noticed the haunted look in his eyes.  How long had he been searching for someone like him?  The last three years Kagome had been trying to shield herself from hurting, but what would she be like if that protective dam suddenly broke and it all came crashing down on her at once?  Looking at Sesshoumaru, it was obvious to her that that exact thing had happened to him.

“How did you find me?” she asked breaking the uncomfortable silence.

“My half-brother often spoke of the Goshinboku in his forest.  Once I found that tree, the rest fell into place.”

For the first time since their meeting, she looked him over.  He was dressed in a dirty t-shirt and ripped jeans, shoes that had seen better days, and his hair was more disheveled than she remembered ever seeing it.

“Do you live near here?” she questioned.

“No.”

“Um, do you have anywhere to go?”

Sesshoumaru crinkled his brows as if in concentration.  “No.”

She sighed again.  'I may come to regret this, but...' “Would you like to come to my place?  It's not that far and-”

“-I would enjoy that,” he said quickly, apparently ready to be in the company of a familiar face.  He had long ago dropped his hand from her neck, but had maintained the closeness of their bodies.

Kagome nodded and stepped away from him, taking the lead to her apartment.  'I suppose he could sleep on the couch.'

)*(*)*(*)*(*)*(

The first night had been awkward, talking about what they had been doing since the times of Naraku and the Sacred Jewel.  Obviously, Sesshoumaru had much more to say than she.  He talked to her until she had fallen asleep on the couch, and then made himself comfortable next to her, enjoying the feel of being so close to someone after so long.

Kagome awoke the next morning and nearly fell off the couch in her shock, but his arm wrapped around her waist and his hand resting on her back kept her from moving.  She had no choice but to stay where she was, so she studied his face while he slept.  He looked at lot more peaceful than he did the night prior and Kagome took solace in that.  Her eyes drifted close and she once again fell asleep, missing the gentle, but possessive look Sesshoumaru gave her.

They spent the day on the couch, sleeping and talking until night drew in on them once again.


*(*)*(*)*

Days turned into weeks and weeks into months, and Kagome stormed out of the bedroom with a pair of boxer-briefs in her hand.

“There's this lovely thing we call a laundry hamper, where all your dirty clothes go after you take them off.  I would appreciate it if you used it.”

“Woman, I am searching for a job at your behest, I do not have time to worry over dirty clothing.”

Kagome narrowed her eyes at the haughty demon and gave off a frustrated growl before tossing the underwear at him, satisfied when they landed atop his head with surprising accuracy.  “Ha!  Uh-oh...”

Kagome screamed and turned tail as Sesshoumaru chased after her, tackling the small woman to the ground.  She giggled as he swung the boxer-briefs over her head, looking at them before turning his attention back to her.

“These have not even been worn,” he said before tossing them away.

“You think I'd actually touch the dirty ones?  Those are still in the bathroom.”

“Hn.  Sneaky woman, you shall be punished for deceiving me.”

“Bring it on, I can take you...I know Karate and will give you a run for your-”

She was abruptly cut off when he pressed his lips to hers in a needy kiss, resting his hands on her hips as he pressed his tongue against her lips.  Kagome complied to his silent request and deepened the kiss, but quickly pushed him away when she felt his hands start to move.

“We can't do this.”

“Why not?”

“Because...because we just can't.”

Sesshoumaru allowed her to get up and watched as she quit the room.  It was a bit of a setback, but he was nothing if not persistent. 


*(*)*(*)*


Months melted together and Kagome stumbled through the front door with grocery bags in her hand.  With much effort, she made her way to the kitchen and deposited her purchases on the counter.  With a heavy sigh she walked towards the living room.

“Ya know, you could have a least offered to help-oh...hello, can I help you with something?” Kagome asked the slender, pretty woman sitting on her couch.

The woman stood and Kagome realized that she was quite tall and imposing.  “Hello, I'm Sorano.  I'm a...friend, of Sesshoumaru's.”

“Oh...I see.” 

They fell into an awkward silence, but it was lifted as Sesshoumaru came out of the bathroom.  “Are you ready to go?” he asked Sorano.

“Yes, I'm ready.”

Sesshoumaru gave Kagome a kiss on the cheek.  “I'll see you tomorrow.”

He led Sorano out of the apartment, but Kagome caught a bit of their conversation.  “Is she your girlfriend or something?”

“No, we're not together.”

Kagome was left standing in the living room, feeling confused and angry.

*(*)*(*)*

A few weeks later, Sesshoumaru returned home from work and found Kagome sitting on the edge of the bed with her head in her hands.

“Kagome?” he questioned.

She shook her head and whispered miserably, “I can't do this.”

He raised a questioning brow and walked over to her. “Can't do what?”

“This!” she repeated, not making herself clear.

“Kagome, I don't understand...”

“Why did you bring her here?  Why did she have to look all...pretty.  And tall!?”

Sesshoumaru gazed at her with a blank look on his face.  “There is no one here, priestess.”

Kagome groaned and looked up at him finally, eyes puffy and red from earlier crying.  “I want you to stop seeing her.”

He stood up straighter and didn't say anything.

“Please.  Just break up with her, call it off, don't see her anymore.”

“Does this mean you want to be with me?” he asked honestly.

“No.  I mean yes.  I mean...I don't know.  I just know that I don't want you to be with her-or anyone else for that matter.” 

She stared into his eyes and could see the wheels in his head turning.  After a moment he kneeled down in front of her and took her hands.  “If that's what you want.”

Kagome nodded, tears streaming down her face.  “Thank you.”

*(*)*(*)*

Months turned into a year, a year turned into two years, and Kagome woke up to smell of fresh coffee brewing, like she did most mornings.  Following her nose, she made her way to the kitchen and greeted Sesshoumaru, who was standing over the stove cooking breakfast.

“Good morning,” she greeted.

She was met with silence.

“Someone woke up on the wrong side of the bed,” she mumbled.

He turned and placed a plate of food in front of her.  She gave him a thank you and was about to dig in, when he suddenly snatched it up from her reach.

“Hey!  I was gonna eat that, I'm really hungry.”

“Does that not leave a bitter taste in your mouth?” he said smartly.

“What's your problem?”

He ran a hand through his hair before setting the plate back down in front of her.  He walked to the counter and grabbed a glass of orange juice before giving it to her and walking out for the room.

“Sesshoumaru?”

“It's nothing,” he said tersely before leaving her to her breakfast.

Kagome got up and followed him into the living room sitting down on the couch next to him.  They sat in silence, both thinking of what to say.  She scooted closer to him until their thighs were touching and she leaned forward to look into his eyes.

“Sesshoumaru-”

He grabbed a handful of her hair and pulled her towards him, pressing his lips against hers while she braced her hands on his chest.  His lips were hot and forceful against her own and Kagome's arms softened, wrapping around his waist and pulling herself closer to him. 

The emotional build-up of the past couple of years was poured into their motions and it left them gasping for air when they pulled apart.

“Tell me what you want, Kagome,” he demanded of her.   

She bit her lip and glanced to the side.  “I can tell you what I don't want,” she offered.

“Yes?”

“I don't want you to sleep on the couch anymore,” she said as she got up and pulled him to the bedroom.

_________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

Hope you enjoyed it!  Thank you for reading :D