Let Go by Aki

Loosing Grip

Title: Let Go

By: Aki_Yume

Synopsis: A response to Kitten’s Album Songfic Challenge. Kagome’s high school life isn’t everything she’s ever hoped for.

Album Used: Avril Lavigne's Let Go

Aki’s Note: There won’t be lyrics in this songfic, except for the “Sk8er Boi” chapter. Also, this story is full of crack and angst. Say it with me now: ANGST ANGST ANGST!!

Okay, I’m done. Enjoy this challenge fic! :D (At least, I hope you enjoy it. @_@)

Chapter 1: Losing Grip

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“Totally, Kagome.” The agreement sounded empty for some reason, and the raven haired girl sighed in contempt. It was always like this. She’s say something and he’d half-heartedly reply.

“Okay.” She smiled for no reason, knowing he wouldn’t see it. InuYasha wasn’t the most observant person in the entire world. Kagome supposed that was her problem; being involved with a guy who pretended she didn’t exist sometimes.

“Like eight tonight, right?” He asked. The silver haired boy’s nose was in a manga, it was a series she’d collected a long time ago. Once upon a time, in middle school, so not that far back, Kagome had once been totally obsessed with everything her friend InuYasha liked. Shonen anime, swords, kendo, boxing; whatever he liked, so did she.

They were middle schoolers; it was normal for a girl do obsess over her crush, that happened with every girl Kagome ever knew. Except, the rest of them outgrew their first crush, while Kagome kept her heart open for only one person.

“Yeah,” Once again, the raven haired girl smiled emptily at her boyfriend in red. Not that it mattered, he would never see it, or the forced laughter, or the insecurity every time he said ‘hi’ to another girl. It wouldn’t be this bad if InuYasha ever actually showed Kagome a real form of affection like he used to. “I...”

Her speech drifted as she remained on the past. Oh Kami, how he used to be so perfect. When they first got together in sophomore year, every time he saw her, a gorgeous smile lit his face. They went on dates almost every single night, and he’d always have a small bouquet of flowers, “Just ‘cause I love you.”

Her most memorable date had been her birthday. He’d taken her to Yokannya for dinner, one of the most expensive places in all of Tokyo, and given her a sterling silver heart pendant with real diamonds set in a swirl pattern all over it. Kagome had treasured that and always wore it; the silver necklace actually adorned her neck at the present moment. He kissed her underneath the full moon and whispered that he loved her, that he’d sooner die than see tears leak from her cerulean eyes.

That night had been the best night of her life.

“What’s up, Kagome?” InuYasha’s question fell on deaf ears as Kagome’s memory resumed playing in her mind.

They’d gone back to her place, Himiko was nice enough to be the wonderfully progressive mother she’d always been and let InuYasha spend the night. They laid in her bed, he had fallen asleep before her, and Kagome has decided to spent time just relaxing in his presence. Her eyes were closed, and she was absently softly stroking the necklace he’d given her.

“I love you, InuYasha.” She’d whispered, knowing he wouldn’t hear her. It was the first time she’d ever been able to say the words out loud; she’d always been insecure with love and affection, needing a constant stream of both in order to survive it seemed.

“Love you.. too...” His sleep ladened voice mumbled through the layer of sleep he’d been condemned to. A smile lit Kagome’s face as she snuggled deeper into his embrace.

“Kikyo.”

Only to have her entire world shatter. Her eyes had widened, tears immediately burned her sight and her breathe came raggedly and forcefully. Kagome completely removed herself from his sleeping embrace and simply stared at his closed eyes. That love hadn’t been meant for her.

Every kiss had been fake.

Every word had been a lie.

Every loving touch and caress had been meant for her older sister, and not her.

In one second, her entire life had come crashing down into the fake, placid world it was now.

“Nothing,” Kagome shook her head and peeled herself off InuYasha’s bed where she’d been for the past hour, trying to elicit any sort of response from her boyfriend. Judging from their states of complete dress, she’d failed. “Let’s go, it’s seven thirty.”

“Fine.” InuYasha sighed and slapped a bookmark into Kagome’s collector manga. It had been highly irritating; a five year old manga, and he treated it like a cheap hooker. Whatever.

The young teenaged girl followed InuYasha out of his room and to the car. She never walked next to him anymore, either. It was weird, and Kagome didn’t know how it started, but for the past few weeks, she had always slipped behind him a few feet. He didn’t open doors for her anymore, either. She’d opened the unlocked blue latch and climbed inside, not really knowing where they were going.

“I’m so excited to see Avatar!” Oh right, the movies. “I heard it’s amazing on all the American threads I read.”

Of course. He had to whore out the fact that he spoke amazing English to her every five seconds. The drive to the theater was uneventful, similar to Kagome’s relationship. This was getting horrible; she didn’t have a life and was a substitute for her perfect older sister. The same sister that had decided to abandon the Higurashi family and moved out. Kikyo’s reasoning was that her family was, “Ugly”.

Kagome had missed her almost twin at first. Then she saw the bitch at school. Barely there clothing, offering other boys her “special skills” for a bit of reimbursement. Her “Big Sissy” had become a tramp.

“We’re here!” Kagome looked up at the sparkling lights of the theater and sighed. She hoped InuYasha wouldn’t ask for head in the middle of the movie. It would be nice to actually enjoy a whole movie for once. Kagome opened her car door and crawled out of the low-rider seat, a blank mask ghosting over her face. “Get me some nachos and meet me by the entrance, I’ll buy our tickets, you have money to cover them?”

Of course. Why not? Kagome shook her head and reached into her pocket or a few yen to give her soul sucking boyfriend.

“Okay,” InuYasha straightened out his red t-shirt and went to the ticket line, leaving Kagome to get him his precious nachos. “See you..”

It was so strange how Kagome couldn’t really see anybody. That was how it always was. She blankly stood in line, waiting patiently for her turn to order something from the over priced counter. The fifteenth heavy sigh escaped Kagome’s lips as her cell phone vibrated three times, telling the girl she had a text waiting for her.

Hey, girlie, what’s up? The most miniscule of smiles lit Kagome’s lips, a shock to anyone near her as she stared at her flip phone’s screen. Sesshoumaru. InuYasha’s “bastard” older brother. They’d been best friends ever since freshman year when she’d run into him once. He was already living on his own at the time, so it was a while until Kagome had learned of his and InuYasha’s shared lineage.

“May I help you, miss?” Kagome was called to the front, and she gave her order.

“Nachos. Extra Jalepenos.” Short and soft, her voice was also weak lately with all the emotional strain she’d been bearing.

I’m out with your brother. She types out her response as she blindly paid for and took Inu’s order with her.

“Meet him at the...” Entrance. Her voice died as she spied her boyfriend waiting exactly where he said he’d be waiting.

Talking to Kikyo.

Kagome stood frozen in place, cell phone buzzing in hand and nacho cheese cooling over a pile of fried chips.

Is that ass treating you right yet?

That text would need to wait for a response from her. Kagome swallowed her insecurities, complexes and lack of confidence and stomped towards her boyfriend, wearing a bright smile he’s only shown Kagome when they were still a real couple. Before he gave himself away that one horrible night.

“Yeah, I’ll talk to you later about that.” Kikyo’s cold eyes had spotted Kagome a mile away, and she could feel the calculations her older sister were making. Kagome really want to know what they’d been talking about; she only wished her older sister would go away, quickly.

“Hi, Kikyo,” She tried her hardest to smile and be polite to the girl that had broken their mother’s heart. “How are you?”

Her sister’s nose wrinkled in disgust at her question.

“Don’t talk to me,” She sneered. “I have no desire to go deaf from your horrible voice.”

With that, she walked away, leaving Kagome alone with a seething boyfriend.

“What the fuck, man!” He growled at no one in particular and swiped the food from Kagome’s hands, commencing to stuff his face with chips and sauce. “Kikyo really fucking hates you, that fucking sucks! I was having a good conversation with her, too!”

That stung. It really did. InuYasha has just spoken about Kikyo more than he’d actually spoken to her at one time in weeks.

Does Kagome need her Knight in Black Leather to rescue her? The text came at almost the perfect time; darn that Sesshoumaru for being so good at things.

“Who’s that?” InuYasha demanded.

No, I’m She’d begun to type

“Sesshoumaru.” She absently responded. She’d say no, she didn’t need him. Just like the many times before she’d asked this question, she’d say she was fine, because she was a spineless idiot that craved love and affection and clung to the idea that InuYasha might have room in his heart for her.

“What the fuck?” InuYasha’s voice rose fifty decibels and nearly blew out Kagome’s eardrums. She flinched and her cell phone clattered to the floor. The taller man snatched it from the ground before she had a chance to recover. “You know how much I hate that asshole! Why the fuck do you keep talking to him? What, I’m not enough for you, you have to go to my fucking failure of an older brother? Are you that easy, Kagome?”

That. Was. The. Last. Straw.

“Fuck you, InuYasha!” She screamed at the top of her lungs. Her vision was blurry, and she couldn’t control a single thing she did. Her right left heaved itself into the man’s crotch, making him almost spill his food and drop her cell phone.

“Your brother is so much more of a man then you’ll ever be!” Her voice was projected even louder by the interior of the theater. She bent down and gently picked up her yellow sludge covered phone and punched a few buttons.

Come get me, please? I’m at Takasugi Theater.

“At least he’s not dating a girl in hopes that she’ll be a good substitute for her slut of a sister!” Slipping her phone back into her pocket, she grabbed the stunned teenaged boy’s plateful of goo. “I can’t believe I’ve stayed with you for so long.”

Reaching up to her neck, she yanked off the cheap Tiffany’s knock off necklace and threw it into the cheese, the yellow mass quickly swallowing the former symbol of her love for InuYasha.

“I hope you choke on it.” Every pore of anger in her body rushed forward as she smashed the plate into the boy’s face, leaving the confused one to sputter and choke on the sharp pieces of chip.

With that done, Kagome walked away. For the first time in months, she felt lighter. Happier. Color streamed back into her sight. For the first time, she saw in bright pastels instead of grungy hopeless grays. A true smile appeared on her face that made her glow as she heard the sound of motorcycle tires screeching to her right.

“Hey, Kagome,” A deep voice rang in her ears, reminding her not all of humanity was a deep tunnel of hell and despair. “Need a ride.”

The teen spun around, her loose hair for once complementing her smile and fair complexion. A tall man, clad in red plaid pants and steel toed boots, a thick leather jacket and loose strands of silver hair spilling from a helmet, stood over his still running cycle.

“Hey, Sesshoumaru,” She smiled, catching the spare pink helmet thrown at her, something her friend had purchased just for her to use as a passenger on his bike. “I haven’t seen you in months.”

“Yeah,” Her savior agreed. His golden visor covered eyes bore into her like two red hot laser beams. “Let’s not have that happen again, right?”

“Never again, yo!” Kagome stuck her tongue out at him as she buckled the helmet into place. She climbed on the back of Sesshoumaru’s sleek Harley Davidson Nightster and laced her arms around his torso. “Let’s get out of here, ‘kay?”

“You still have explaining to do.” Her friend shot back. The two of them heard shrieks and yells coming from behind them and turned to see InuYasha running from the theater towards the pair.

“Kagome! This shit isn’t done with! What the fuck?” InuYasha’s only answer was Kagome’s middle finger as she raced away with wind on Sesshoumaru’s bike.

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Aki’s Note: WHEW! I wrote that all in one sitting. XD lol. Loosing Grip will not be played for a WHILE on Aki’s iTunes. @_@ She’s doing this fic for her BFF Yuka, who gave her the plot bunny for it after I told her about Kitten’s challenge. XD

Next Chapter will be “Complicated”, which will get here eventually. xP

Now, back to Sociology homework! XD