In Death, Trust Me, as You Didn't in Life by Kanna37

Dreamweaver

Sango whimpered, tossing and turning, unable to get comfortable in her sleep.  Too many thoughts and fears were twisting her dreams, leaving her aura enflamed and dark.

A pair of violet eyes watched her as she fought in her sleep, knowing full well what was causing her upset.

Inuyasha.

The half demon and his absolute refusal to let Kagome go.  Sango, he knew, felt the same, she wanted to go and make the young miko return, but didn't want to anger her fiance, knowing his thoughts on the situation.

It wasn't that he didn't want to see her back with them.  Not at all.  But it was a selfish desire, and he knew that... because the tiny miko didn't want to come back.  She had asked him, them, to let her go.  He felt bound to respect that.

But he knew that Inuyasha wasn't going to give up.  He'd already been told that Kagome had asked to be left alone - and he didn't care.  As far as he was concerned, she'd promised to stay by his side 'til he didn't want her there anymore, and since he still wanted her there, that's where she belonged.

Simplistic - and selfish.  

Inuyasha wouldn't listen, though, and didn't much care if they all thought he was being selfish.

He wouldn't even listen to Kikyou about it.  The woman had tried to talk to him, to get him to see reason, but he barely tolerated her presence, let alone her words about Kagome.  He'd taken her aside, told her he was happy that she had her life back, that it was only fair, but that she now had a life to make... and she needed to start making it.

Without his presence - since he'd be busy.

She'd been hurt, but deep down, was still holding out hope that, once he figured out that he couldn't get Kagome back, he'd return to her, so she'd chosen to stay behind in the village instead of following him on his new quest.  Miroku thought that was actually wise of her.

Sango whimpered again, then, rolling over, she settled, and seemed to drop into a deeper sleep.  With a tired sigh, the monk lay back and closed his eyes.

May as well sleep while I can.  I have a feeling my friends are going to need a level head in the coming days.

---wWw---

Where is this place?  

Sango couldn't see anything around her, she was trapped in thick, roiling mists, and yet, she didn't feel any fear... just sadness.  Moving forward, she realized that her movements were not restricted, but that it didn't seem to make any difference, because no matter which way she moved, everything was the same.

Annoyed, she decided to sit down.  If I'm not going to get anywhere, I'm not going to bother wasting my energy.  What a stupid dream!

"Gee thanks, Sango.  Sorry I didn't come up with better scenery.  How's this?"  

Suddenly, the mists were gone, and she was sitting before the well in the clearing, and her astonishment was complete as Kagome strolled out from under the trees... looking as alive as she ever had.

"Ka-kagome?  But... but you're..."  she couldn't finish that sentence - not even after five days.  It just hurt too much.

She flinched when Kagome laughed, flashing a brilliant smile at her.  "What, Sango, dead?  I suppose I am - but it really doesn't feel that much different than being alive, to tell you the truth."

Sango sank back on her heels, then, a devastated expression settling on her pale features.  "I get it,"  she said, dully,  "this is a dream.  Just a dream... you're not real."

Kagome plopped down next to her sister, and sighed.  "Well, it is a dream, but I am really here, you know.  I wanted to come and talk to you about something, and this is the only way I could.  But..."  she glanced at Sango out of the corner of her eye,  "my companion is also here with me.  We both have some messages to pass on."

The taijiya frowned, looking over at her uncertainly.  "Uhh... companion?"  There had been something in her voice when she said that...

"Yes."  

Something must have passed between her and the person, because after a moment, Kagome glanced over her shoulder, and following her sister's eye, she watched, astounded, as a glimmer of white appeared beneath the trees... and slowly moved into the clearing.

Eyes wide, she stared at the imposing figure before her, actually more afraid of him here, in a dream, than she had been of him in life.

His presence... here, in this place...

"Lord Sesshoumaru?!"  she whispered, voice taken in shock.

"Taijiya."  He nodded in acknowledgment, and sat down by Kagome's side.

Sango turned to Kagome.  "Why?"

Kagome giggled at that question, and the look on her friend's face.  "Didn't he send the message with Jaken that he would be waiting for me?  Why is it such a surprise?"

"B-but... he's,"  she looked quickly at the demon Lord,  "no disrespect, Lord Sesshoumaru,"  he cocked a brow,  "but... he's, well, he's Sesshoumaru!"

"So?"

Sango sat there, flabbergasted.  So?  This somehow doesn't bode well for Inuyasha...

"Kagome, there's something you should know.  Inuyasha's gone off the deep end, and he's dragging us off in the morning to look for a way to bring you back, as ridiculous as it sounds."

Kagome looked at Sesshoumaru, mouth tightening, then faced Sango again.  "We know, Sango.  And... it's not ridiculous.  There is a way."

Sango stared at her for a moment, then squealed excitedly.  "There is?  Oh, but that's wonderful, Kagome!  We can actually bring you back to be with us!"

Kagome looked away at that, trying to order her thoughts.  She was a bit surprised when Sesshoumaru reached out and put a hand on her shoulder comfortingly, but she smiled at him, and placed her hand over his own.  Turning back to Sango, she shook her head.

"I love you guys, Sango, I really do... and in some ways, I miss you all.  But... I don't want to come back.  I meant what I told Miroku that last day.  What I asked him.  To let me go."  She watched sadly as Sango flinched in disbelief.  "I'm happy now, my sister.  Please... tell Inuyasha to leave me be.  He has his chance with Kikyou now.  He needs to move on from my death, and start to live."

Sango stared incredulously at the two beings sitting with her... easily noting the standoffish Lord's gentle touch on her sister... and her sister's acceptance of that touch.

"Kagome... why are you with him?"

And Kagome smiled again, brightly, her spirit shining through easily.  "Because I want to be.  We travel together, now."

She met the Lord's eye, then.  "Why would you want to travel with a human woman, Lord Sesshoumaru?  Don't you hate us?"

Sesshoumaru held her gaze easily.  "I do not.  But even if I did, you would still not find hatred in myself for Kagome - because it does not exist.  Nor did it for many months before either of our deaths."

Sango stared at him for a few minutes, then, with a sinking heart, looked at Kagome.  "You really don't want to come back?"  she asked wistfully.

"No.  For the first time since I fell through the well, Sango, I'm at peace.  There's no pain in my heart.  I will stay with Sesshoumaru."

The taijiya bit back tears, but nodded.  "Okay.  So you want me to tell Inuyasha to back off, huh?"  At Kagome's nod, she sighed.  "Well, that's gonna be fun.  You do know he probably won't listen, don't you?"

Sesshoumaru answered that one.  Dryly, he said,  "We are aware of the stubborn nature of my brother.  He was always this way, so it comes as no surprise now."

"Okay, well, I was just checking."  She eyed the Lord.  He seems... different.  A little bit more open.  "Anything else you'd like me to pass along?"

Again, the two glanced at each other, then back at her, both nodding.  Kagome answered, saying,  "Yeah.  Tell everyone that I miss them, and love them all, especially Shippo and Rin.  And tell Rin that Lord Sesshoumaru misses her... and that he is proud of the lady she is becoming.  She is a credit to him as his former ward."

Sango nodded, then looked down sadly.  When she looked back up, they were standing, and she slowly got to her feet, knowing this was goodbye.  "I'll tell them.  I... wish you would reconsider, Kagome, but I won't try to persuade you... if you're happy, then... I'll let it go.  But if Inuyasha refuses to let go, I still intend to travel with him, you understand, right?"

Kagome smiled at her.  "It's okay, Sango, I wouldn't want you guys to abandon him because he's being a baka.  If that was all it took, we'd have all run off within moments of meeting him, ne?"

"Yeah... isn't that the truth?"

Kagome chuckled, then took the arm the Lord offered her.  Before she turned away, she caught Sango's eye.  "Keep that lecherous monk in line, sister of my heart.  Always remember that I love you guys!"  With that, she turned and walked away, secure on the arm of the demon Lord, the clearing near the well disappearing slowly from around her as she found herself in darkness.  

---wWw---

"Sango!"

She sat up suddenly, with a gasp, extremely disoriented, and blinking back tears.  Putting up a hand, she covered her heart, feeling it beating frantically in her chest, and as it calmed slowly, she looked up, catching Miroku's and Inuyasha's stunned and concerned gazes.

"What happened?"

Miroku glanced at Inuyasha, then back at her.  "We're not sure, Sango.  You were glowing... glowing the same pink as Kagome's spiritual powers, and mumbling in your sleep.  It woke me, and Inuyasha came running in, saying he felt Kagome."

Sango's eyes widened, then.  So it really wasn't a dream!  It was her... She stood up, accepting Miroku's offered hand, as she still felt shaky, and caught Inuyasha's stare.  He's really not going to take this well...

"Follow me," she whispered.  "I have some things to tell you, and I don't want to wake anyone else."  The two nodded, following her out the door, as she made for the goshinboku.  She didn't know why, but it felt right to tell them what she'd dreamed while near Kagome's grave.

Once they reached the tree, Sango sat near her sister's grave, and stared down at it for a few minutes.  Miroku seemed content to let her do things at her own pace, however, Inuyasha, as always, was impatient.

"Oi!  Start talkin', Sango.  What was all that back there, and why was Kagome's aura surrounding you?"

Sango shook herself out of her thoughts, and turned a jaundiced eye on her half demon friend.  "Because Kagome came to me in a dream, Inuyasha.  She had some messages to pass on, she said."

Inuyasha stared at her in surprise, as did Miroku.  "Well, what the hell did the wench have to say?"

"That she wants you to leave well enough alone, Inuyasha.  She doesn't want to be brought back."

There was a dead silence, then, that pressed down into the clearing around the great tree, ominous and still as Inuyasha turned her words over in his mind.  

"What else, Sango?"  Miroku's voice was steady, though he was surprised.

Sango sighed, and looked at the two graves before her.  Quietly, she said,  "Kagome wasn't alone, either.  Care to take a guess who was with her?"  she asked, tilting her head significantly towards the other grave.

"Oh, fuck no!  Don't tell me that asshole was hanging around with my miko!  What the fuck was he doing there, Sango?"

"Kagome said that they travel together now, and that she's happy, and at peace for the first time since she fell down the well."  Face half-hidden by her bangs, Sango finished,  "She looked it, too.  She wasn't hurting, and you could see it.  I've never seen her that way before - free of pain, I mean."

Miroku nodded, remembering Kagome's last words.  "Sesshoumaru-sama... you came."  There had been relief in her voice, then.

"It is as I told you, Inuyasha.  She doesn't want to be brought back."

At that, Inuyasha let loose a growl of rage, and spun around, facing away from the graves.  "Leave me and go back to the hut.  This won't change my mind - I still leave at first light."

Shaking her head, Sango stood, and taking Miroku's proffered hand, moved out of the area, heading back to Kaede's.  

Inuyasha stared at the tree line, desperately trying to tamp down the rage in his heart at the knowledge that she was not only with his damned brother, but didn't want to come back.  Turning on his heel, he stared at the graves, first Kagome's, then on to Sesshoumaru's.

Eyes red, he said,  "I'm taking her back, bastard, you can't have her.  Whether she wants to come back or not - I can't let her go."  He raised his voice, shouting into the still air.  "Why the fuck couldn't you find someone else to wait for?!  Why her?!"

A breeze rose then, lifting Inuyasha's heavy hair, swirling through the area, and in that breeze, he distinctly heard his brother's voice.

Because, Inuyasha, this Sesshoumaru has never seen more life in anyone, human or demon, than he found in her eyes.  The miko's soul is life, in it's purest form.

Whether in your realm, or this one, it matters not.

She is life.  

My life.

The breeze died, and so did his brother's voice.  

His rage did not.

"Forget it, brother.  She promised me."

The winds rose again, and when they died down, the clearing stood empty once more.

---wWw---

Sesshoumaru watched his half demon brother disappear from the little dell by the Goshinboku, irritation at his stubborn refusal to let sleeping dogs lie (no pun intended) flowing like quicksilver through his veins.  The boy would never learn, it seemed.

With a thought, he dismissed the halfling, and turned his attentions to the world - through Kagome's eyes.  It looked the same, really, and yet... subtly different.  Where his senses were obviously sharper than hers, making it an inherent fact that he saw the world through a different lens, he had never been aware that as a human, she saw the world in any other way except in the dull way her human senses and weaknesses would allow.

He was very surprised to find that he was wrong - although, perhaps he should not have been.  After all, this was Kagome.  Nothing he'd ever learned about her hadn't in some way been extraordinary.  Apparently, that was about the only thing she couldn't figure out how to be...

Ordinary.

She wasn't, and she never would be.

And so he spread his senses open, taking in every aspect of her view of the world.  Colors were sharper, scents, while weaker in her nose than they would be in his, were overlaid with tantalizing fringes of other things, and the whole covered and colored by emotion.

This was the most astounding thing of all.  Something that he had always disdained as a weakness had become to her, instead, a strength.  It was... an amazing thought - emotion, feelings, to her, were another sense, one that went above and beyond the normal five that humans had.  A sixth sense, if you will... one that shaded the world around her with nuance and subtleties that he'd never even imagined in all his power and knowledge.

For her, it wasn't sight that was her primary sense... it was emotion.

With that realization, came more questions.

He brought himself out of his trance, and laying his gaze on the woman before him, he studied her form for several seconds before waking her.

How trustworthy can emotion be as a sense?  And even though I wonder - to walk through her dreams is indeed more than I could ever have imagined, even if it only leads to more questions.

"Miko.  It is time to wake."  He waited, rather impatiently, as she opened her eyes and sat up.  "I have... questions."

Kagome cocked a curious brow.  What could he be wondering about now?  "After all this time of studying me, Sesshoumaru, you'd think you'd know everything there is to know about me already,"  she teased.

"I would say that you should be correct in that assumption, Kagome, but you would not be.  If you had really been so easy to figure out, as you say, then you would never have caught my attention in the first place," he finished wryly, openly acknowledging the fascination she held for him.

"Well, then, ask your questions.  That is, after all, what this was all about.  Giving you a chance to answer all your questions about me."  Something unpleasant occurred to her, then, and she frowned down at her hands for a minute, before smoothing her brow and looking back up at him.  

Let him ask his questions... then I can ask mine.

"For a moment, while together in your dream, I was able to see the world as you see it."  He watched her face carefully, hoping she would not see it as an invasion of her privacy.  She merely looked back at him, obviously waiting for him to finish, so he continued.  

"How is it that you trust your emotions more than your sight, as a sense, as your main sense?"

Kagome scrunched her nose up thoughtfully, looking away, then flicked a quick look at him from under her bangs.  "So... you noticed that, huh?"  She sighed when he nodded.  "It's... difficult to articulate, so please, be patient as I try to explain, okay?"

He bowed his head in understanding.  "Take your time, miko, we are not exactly in a hurry."

She chuckled.  "Yeah, there is that."  Closing her eyes, she let a smile drift across her lips.  "It was always that way for me, you know.  From the time of my first memories, the world around me was colored by the emotions left behind by everything, even animals."  As his eyes showed surprise, she grinned.  "Yeah, even animals have them, though they are much more... simplistic, I would have to say.  Anyway, I always just seemed to know what was going on around me in that way, and I knew very early on that it was much more reliable than sight."

Sesshoumaru broke in there, unable to understand how.  "Why would it be more reliable than what you can see with your own eyes, miko?"

She looked slightly surprised at his question.  "Well, because sight is the easiest sense to fool, of course.  I've never understood how people can have such faith in something that was so often and easily overcome."

He stared at her, completely caught off guard at her answer.

"Think about it this way, Sesshoumaru.  If Inuyasha and Kikyou had trusted their hearts all those years ago instead of their eyes, none of this would have happened... do you see what I mean now?"  Kagome couldn't understand how such a simple concept could be so hard to figure out.

Although, for one who's never looked into his own heart before, I guess I can understand his confusion on how to use it.

Dropping his eyes to the ground in front of him, a line appeared on his brow, as he considered her words.  He was totally astounded at the concepts she was laying before him.  They were nothing that he would ever have thought of on his own...

And yet...

Kagome chuckled again.  "Guess I flipped your switch on that one, didn't I?"  She waited for him to focus on her again, then waved a hand around herself to indicate their surroundings.  "Every place has an emotional signature, Sesshoumaru, and it's how I learn to see a place.  I know whether it's a good place or a bad place before I even get there - just by the emotional aura that surrounds it."  She smiled at him.  

"Most places are pretty neutral - carrying both good and bad in equal measure.  Some places are far nicer than others... and some... some are truly drenched in blood, hatred, malice - every negative, hateful thing that you can imagine.  Those places... I stay away from.  Because once tainted, always tainted.  And that makes them dangerous."

So... emotions... carry an... aura?

"In other words, emotions are another type of energy... and you read it."

Her smile widened.  "I guess you could say it that way.  I'm kinda what people in my time call an empath.  It goes hand in hand with my miko powers.  After all, miko powers are a bond of nature - a bond to all living things.  This is just another aspect of that, really."

"And yet, I've yet to meet another miko who utilizes such.  Why then are you so different?"

Kagome giggled, shaking her head at him.  

"And I guess that's the million dollar question, isn't it?  It's why you waited for me."

Only partially, little miko. But you know... I do not think that I could ever find the answers to all of the questions that exist within you...

Even with all of eternity at my fingertips.