The Many Perils of Supermarkets by thirteenxwishes

The Many Perils of Supermarkets

A/N: Written for Skye's Weekly Challenge.  The prompt was 'Search' - un-beta'd, around 1,060 words of my random humour-ish stuff.  Anyway - enjoy!  :)

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The Many Perils of Supermarkets

'The mighty Lord of the West, reduced to grocery shopping.'

Yes, the supermarket was mostly empty.  Yes, there were no youkai within sensing distance.  But the principle still stood.  This type of useless errand was one of the many reasons why he employed a cook.  In fact, if he remembered rightly - which he did - it was worded indelibly into the contract; 'the role of the head cook is to provide adequate nourishment for the occupants of the Western townhouse, including purchasing said nourishment, or ingredients thereof.  Money to be provided in addition to salary.'  Yes.  That was it.

So really, what the hell was he doing here?

Sesshoumaru pinched his eyes shut and counted slowly to ten.  The array of brightly-coloured confectionaries and madly grinning cartoon mascots were almost enough to give him a headache.  Almost.  Because, after all, he was a Daiyoukai and therefore infallible to such a weak foe as chronic head pain.  His doctor would say otherwise.  If he weren't so afraid of finding out the exact molecular and chemical formulation of Sesshoumaru's poison.

The basket in his hand squeaked.  For once, he wished humans could be just a little more ignorant so he could drop his disguise and crush the damned thing.  If this trip were for any other reason that his honour...

Yes.  His honour as a Lord was at stake.  He had sworn to Rin over dinner at her family's modest flat months before that he would provide a cake for the birthday of her youngest pup, confident in the presence of his cook and her skills to perform this fairly mundane task.  It would be proof that he could still provide for his long-grown ward and her clan of fox-hanyou children.

Unfortunately, today was the one day, the only day in almost thirty years of service, that his cook had chosen to fall ill.  If not for previous record of good character, he would suspect a conspiracy.  Probably involving Inuyasha.  And maybe that kitsune husband of Rin's.  He always did have a tail for mischief.

Hn.

"Sesshoumaru?"

Would the child accept a six pack of chocolate buns?  Would that do?

"... Sesshoumaru?"

Or did they want a hand crafted Michelin star work-of-art from the top patisserie chef in Japan?

"... erm, Sesshoumaru?  Can you hear me?"

Was this even a satisfactory supermarket?  Did he have to go elsewhere, be even later for the monthly board meeting than he already was?

"Hellooo..."

What did eleven-year old hanyou even want, anyway?  It had been centuries since he was young enough to be considered a child - not that he had been remotely child-like.   Maybe he should contact Inuyasha.  He was immature enough to know.  But then, if there was a conspiracy, his reputation would be well and truly shattered once the half-breed spread word of his predicament.

"Sesshoumaru!"

Would Rin find out about his failure?  Would her mate?  Her pup?  The entire youkai community?

"Oh, for god's sake.  Sesshoumaru!"

He blinked, suddenly aware of a hand waving vigorously in front of his face.  This hand could be followed along an arm to meet the shoulder of a familiar figure, brandishing a rather full basket and apparently extremely close to accosting his person.  Probably violently.

Only a select few were capable of such an act while having their heads remain in the infinitely preferable company of their bodies.  Luckily - or not, depending on your perspective - his loud attacker appeared to be one of them.

"Miko."

"About damn time you woke up!"

Kagome huffed, rocking back on her heels and apparently satisfied now that she had captured his wandering attention.  He frowned.

"I am always aware of my surroundings, miko.  Whether I choose to respond to certain irritants, however, is another matter entirely."

She rolled her eyes.  "Whatever.  Anyway, I've been told that you need help."

He could feel his eyebrow rising on its usual steady course towards his hairline; an action that always seemed to occur in the presence of this particular female.  Not that he was taking note of such trivialities.

"By your silence, I'm guessing that you haven't realised you need help yet."

"This Sesshoumaru never requires help from-"

"-anyone, especially an unworthy human woman.  Yeah, I know.  You've said before.  But this Kagome does happen to know more about baking and children's birthday parties than a dog demon who clearly still thinks we live the Feudal Era."

For the first time, he noticed the contents of her basket.  Flour, butter, sugar, eggs, chocolate, baking powder...

Ah.

When he looked back, she was smiling.

"Yeah.  Rin told me about your promise to bake Hitomi a cake after she found out Aya-chan fell sick.  She wondered if you'd be having trouble."  She surveyed the array of cakes and his conspicuously empty basket.  "Looks like she was right."

He sniffed, pointedly ignoring the twinge of gratitutde he felt towards his former ward for sparing him from this shameful situation.  The feeling also extended, oddly enough, to the stubborn woman standing in front of him.

"By the way, if it's any reassurance to your bruised ego - she's shut Shippou in the kitchen for magicking up those flowers that Aya's allergic to.  And Inuyasha is firmly in the doghouse according to Kikyou.  Expect him to be extremely sulky for the next few board meetings."

The humour sparkled in her voice and Sesshoumaru felt his own lips twitch, relaxing despite himself.  The handles of the basket finally stopped squeaking.

"Hn.  I will not be defeated by a mere birthday cake, miko."

She snorted, reaching over and prising the basket out of his grip, setting it down on a nearby stack, ready and waiting for its next - and, hopefully less violent - customer. 

"I'll have to make sure my baking skills are worthy of the House of the West, then, won't I?"

His hand caught hers - removed her basket to hook around his arm before tugging her down the aisle and towards the cashier.  Sesshoumaru didn't bother to suppress the smirk as her fingers curled easily into his. 

"Yes, miko.  You will."

By the time they left the supermarket after a small squabble at the till ('I could've paid for that!'  'Cease your incessant arguing, woman.') they were comfortably ensconced in his car and moving through the traffic to her apartment.

'Maybe grocery shopping isn't such a fruitless pursuit for a youkai lord.' he decided, sparing a glance for the miko in the seat next to him, sorting through the bag and muttering weights and measures to herself.  'In fact, I feel further research into the practice is necessary.'

Kagome hummed as she checked the use-by date of the chocolate, totally oblivious to the plans forming in the mind of the Western Lord as he pulled into the car park outside her complex. 

It was probably better that she remained ignorant.  She'd find out sooner or later, anyway.

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Thanks for reading!  Reviews and criticism welcomed.  :)