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To the Sick and Wanting by Sora-chan

Chapter 1

Hi, yis its a new story, one I've been working on for quite a while. The plot is originally Dany's and I compounded on it. The summary sucks, I am aware, but hey if you're this far in, then I guess it did its job.

Just a note: When I began this story, there had been no outbreak, word or even thought of the Influenza A (H1N1, or "Swine flu"), and this is not to be in anyway, mocking, or making light of the situation going on around us. It may seem tactless or insensitive for me to post this at this particular time, but I know my intentions are very clean. If you feel otherwise, I invite you to click your back button and continue on with your search of fiction. It is not my intention to offend anyone either, so if you feel that way, you are also free to click the back button.

Disclaimer: I am making no profit nor am I intending to make light of a very serious global crisis.

There, now that that is out of the way, for those of you that have remained, I thank you for sticking with me and I hope you enjoy.

Chapter One:

She had been feeling very off kilter lately, granted, the days had been especially cruel to the little shard group. The sun was the hottest it had ever been; it being summer wasn't enough to justify the intense heat anymore. It instantly drained any and all energy, leaving them to make more frequent stops than before, much to the chagrin of a certain inu hanyou.

It had been a miserable few days, because of their low energy, battles seemed harder, fiercer, and tensions around the hanyou grew. Everyone knew that it was only a matter of time before the half demon blew up on them, Kagome more than the others.

Although she trusted he wouldn't hurt her or any of them, she also knew that he as very unpredictable when it came to the Shikon Jewel. She tried her hardest to placate everyone, to keep everyone content and calm. And to make matters worse, she hadn't seen Lord Sesshoumaru in over a week.

Seeing his mother's mood souring, Shippou slowed his gait to allow her to catch up to him, after three years of hunting, he had reached his first maturity, puberty if you will and literally shot up overnight. It had been a lightly painful process for him, but it was nothing that he wasn't able bear. Now he stood at her shoulders and looked much older than he did before.

Looking at his mother, the Kit quickly deduced what was wrong, he was the only one who knew that his mother was seeing the Western Lord and to tell the truth, it did not come as a shock to him. He knew that his mother was destined for great things, and she was exotic for their era, Sesshoumaru seemed to be the type to enjoy unusual things, to be drawn to complexities and the like, there was no bigger complexity that his surrogate mother.

At first he had feared that the terrible Lord would mistreat his mother, but soon realized that such thoughts were unfounded. The Youkai Lord was an honorable one, and after seeing the goofy smile that planted itself to her face one afternoon, he knew that nothing bad would come of their attentions.

He knew the demon was courting her, going through the preprocesses, getting her used to his presence and such before he asks her permission to take their relationship further. Shippou had nothing to worry about, and if he and Sesshoumaru had their way, his mother would be happily mated by next spring.

But that isn't to say that aren't any problems, Inuyasha posed the biggest of them all. The inu hanyou tended to be a bit over-possessive where the little miko was concerned. It was obvious that he wanted nothing to do with her other than searching for the jewel fragments and possible friendship (and even that was hard to read), but he treated her as if she were to become his mate, snarling and growling at any male who glanced in her direction for too long.

Sango and Miroku, Shippou knew wouldn't have that big a problem with the relationship, after all, they wanted Kagome to be happy, and if Sesshoumaru made her happy, then who were they to deny her that? But they couldn't be told for obvious reasons, the less persons to know the better, especially since the relationship wasn't exactly public knowledge as yet. It was customary that as soon as the suit was accepted, then the soon-to-be-mated pair would announce their intentions.

And if Sango and Miroku were to know, it was known that they would keep the secret, but who was to say that it wouldn't slip from their mouths in the presence of the hanyou? Sesshoumaru had made his intentions as clear as day to the little (not so) Kit when it was obvious that the little youkai knew, and he intended (if the miko would have him) to make her his bride and mate.

The two had been meeting secretly for about two cycles now, every other day the demon would arrive at the edge of whatever camp they made and the miko would decide to take a walk. It was accepted within the pack because they saw her walks as a way for her to clear her head away from them. They all knew her efforts to keep everyone complacent and such, so they allowed her this nightly reprieve.

Looking up to her face, he nudged his shoulder to hers to get her attention, when he received it, he whispered some reassurances to her, letting her know that it was okay to worry and that the Demon Lord would be fine. She smiled lightly back at him and nodded her thanks. Returning her smile, he decided to continue walking beside her until they stopped for a rest.

Kagome looked down at her little Kit, the small smile still on her lips. She didn't know what she would do without the boy, she was glad that he was aware of her (hopefully) budding relationship with the Demon Lord, she knew that she would not have been able to keep that from him. Sesshoumaru had advised her of the practice that you didn't tell if you were being courted until formally asked, and while he had informally asked (at her request) she could not say a word to anyone until later, not even Sango.

Thinking of the regal Lord always brought a giddy smile to her features, she loved their time together, he made her feel like she was the only female in the world. He gave her his full attention and he allowed her to speak whatever was on her mind. She didn't feel the need to curb who she was around him, he listened to her and didn't judge her, he gave her insight to herself and it made her feel exceptional.

Of course, she had been hesitant at first, every moment wondering if he was using this as a ruse to try and use her to his own gain. And when that proved to not be the case, she wondered if he was one of those males that told you want they knew you wanted to hear to get what they wanted from you.

He had realized her hesitance and disbelief and swore to her that he was not doing it for any unsavory reasons, that he really was interested in getting to know her. The weeks after that had been pure bliss. But now, he was gone the longest he had ever been. She knew he had obligations; duties that were bigger than her, but she still could not help but feel worried when he was gone for a period of time.

She felt like she was obsessed with him, wanting to spend every waking (and sleeping) moment with him like she did, but Shippou had advised her that it was normal. She didn't understand how her little Kit knew that, but would take his word for it. He was a lot older than she knew and behaved wiser than one his age perceived. And since she couldn't speak about it with Sango, she had to accept his word. She had never had a boyfriend, or any boy that was interested in her (save Hojo, but he didn't count) so she was bound to feel confused and self conscious about how she was feeling.

Feeling a dizzy-spell hit her, she was glad that Shippou had decided to stay close, grabbing his arm to steady herself, she took a deep breath. Shippou looked over at his mother, waiting for her to feel better before he moved off, his was normal as of late. Due to the extreme heat, it wasn't rare to see any of the humans pausing for a quick breather. The sun stole vast amounts of energy from their weaker bodies, youkai were conditioned to fight the effects at an early age, so they could go longer in intense heat.

That was one of the reasons why Inuyasha always got impatient when it came to their rest stops, being part demon he had a higher tolerance for the heat, that isn't to say that he was immune to their effects as he still became tired quickly (more quickly than Kirara or Shippou). Seeing that a stop was in order, the young Kit gained the hanyou's attention.

"Inuyasha we need to stop" he called, hearing the aggravated sigh that the more self-proclaimed leader let loose before leading his mother-figure to a shaded tree. Seeing this, Miroku led the demon slayer that he secretly admired to a flat rock and set her upon it, she smiled gratefully to him before taking a swig from the water cooler that she had in her small pack.

Kagome wiped the sweat from her brow, really wishing that it were time to set up camp so she could find somewhere to bathe, a nice cool spring was what she was shooting for. But knowing their ‘great and terrible leader' he would want to drag them on a few more miles before even considering camp.

She felt a shift in the air, slightly subtle and unnoticeable to most if not all, except her. Glancing over at Inuyasha, she knew he felt it too if his suddenly tense shoulders were anything to go by. She watched him from the corner of her eye as he looked around sharply before getting up and mumbling something to Miroku. The monk looked slightly confused for a moment before the Hanyou took off, hightailing it to the east of where they stopped.

"He's gone to Kikyo" Shippou muttered beside her, she could hear him griping under his breath about leaders that did nothing for the pack. Smiling lightly, she combed her fingers through his hair, knowing it would calm him down. The last thing she needed was for him to bite into the hanyou when he returned from whatever he normally did with the dead woman.

"Don't let it bother you Ship, think of it this way, the longer he's gone, the longer we get to take a breather" the miko replied, smiling over at her sister-figure. She knew that Miroku and Sango constantly worried for her, especially when it came to the hanyou, and every time, she tried to reassure them. They wouldn't believe her until she came out and told them that she was practically dating Sesshoumaru. And seeing as how that couldn't happen, at least not yet, then they would never believe her.

"I think we should have a bite Lady Kagome, what do you think?" Miroku voiced, the miko smiled at him before nodding as much as her dizzy body could. The monk and Kit went straight to it, none of them knew just how long the hanyou would take this time around (as it was an almost daily occurrence) and they wanted to at least have a small snack before he got back into slave driver mode.


Lord Sesshoumaru of the West walked languidly along to southern most borders of his lands. He had been in the south on conference for the last few days and he was itching to be back in his comfort zone. Back in his own home, with his own people and back with his miko.

He had spent almost the entire trip thinking of the innocent but extraordinary human that had caught his attention. Every moment he spent away from her, he was reminded just how lonely his life really was and how much he wanted her to fill that void. It hadn't mattered to him that she was human the day that he had decided to court her, and it still did not matter to him now.

To him, she was neither human nor demon, she was just Kagome and that was what drew him to her. He knew it was completely opposite as what he was viewed as, but he had decided a long time ago that if he ever met the female that captured both his and his beast's attention wholly, he would keep nothing back when with her.

Of course it had taken a bit of time (two years to be precise) for him to realize and accept his feelings for her as what they were and then it was a whole other matter altogether for him to gain the courage to request time with her. Initially, he had feared the rejection of his chosen female, but when he realized her fear and hesitance of him and his intentions, he knew that she was the one whom he wanted to bear his mark. And he knew she would do so with pride.

Her Kit had been another issue, or at least he had thought he would be, he had not expected for the Kitsune to request an audience with him, only to demand to know what intentions (if he had had any) towards his ‘mother'. Surprise didn't begin to cover what the Demon Lord felt, but whatever it had been it was quickly replaced with relief, he would have hated to force Kagome to choose between the one she saw as her son and the youkai who was formally an enemy (or enemy of their pack leader) that wanted to court her. He knew if that had been the case, their relationship would not have made it past the first days.

Seeking the attentions of a human was very different that getting those of a demon, he realised, while the demon had instincts to lead it, and a beast to tell it what to do, humans were not so in tuned with their bodies. It was interesting to see how Kagome reacted to most of the things he did, how her face would flush prettily when he complimented her, or she would look away in embarrassment when he held her hand for longer than what was deemed appropriate.

Of course, the embarrassment took a while to get used to, it had taken him sometime (and a sit down with both her and the Kit (separately of course)) for him to realize that while she was slightly embarrassed to be in the situation, it wasn't a bad sort of embarrassment (that in itself took a while to understand, he assumed it was a human thing) and she wasn't embarrassed at him. That was the most important part.

Things had progressed smoothly after that, he made it a point to try and see her as often as possibly without smothering her, she seemed to appreciate the attention and he tried to keep their meetings as ritual as possible. Before now, he had only ever left her side for two days at most, always telling her when he would be going and when he should be back, and she always took it in stride.

When he had told her that he would be crossing over into the Southern borders for a forum, she had given him the most heartbreaking look. He knew she had tried to keep it hidden, she had told him before that she didn't want to burden him with her emotions and such and had vowed to not allow it to bother her when he left for duties, but he knew it did. It always bothered her, she tried not to show it but he knew it was there, he learnt the signs long ago. It was impossible for her to keep what she felt completely hidden; he didn't think she knew how. She tried, he knew she tried, but he had learnt her too well.

He had found it hard to leave his lands, but had forced himself as it was his duty as Lord, and it would have been impolite (and possibly war-sparking) if he had just opted to not go, especially at the last minute.

Throughout the entire session he had missed her, more than he had thought that a being could miss another, but he knew that that was what it was. He had missed her presence and aura, but most of all he had missed her. He knew that there was no other for him, and if she decided to deny him, to not mate with him, to not be with him anymore (Kami forbid), he would never have another.


A deep inhale followed by a gasping breath surmised that something was not right. Kagome groaned as another cough racked her small body, she felt miserable and the heat was not helping her in any way. Last night had been warmer than most so she had thought it to be a good idea to sleep on top of her sleeping bag instead of in it. When she woke up this morning with a headache the size of a Mack truck and her sinuses draining, she realised just how much of a bad idea it had been.

Blowing her nose, she smiled faintly over at Shippou who watched her carefully, ensuring that the symptoms she was displaying were the only ones. He had been asking her all morning if anything hurt, then if anything was sore and if he could help her with anything. She felt smothered but said nothing knowing that it was his instinct to protect her causing him to behave that way.

He had also asked her a couple times if she wanted him to seek out the Demon Lord, she had swiftly declined telling him that he was away on important business and her having a cold was nothing for them to worry him about. She had made him promise not to tell the youkai that quite possibly held her heart, and he had, grudgingly.

It made her proud, happy and confined at the same time. She knew now that until she got over this, she wouldn't be allowed to do a lot of things. Surprisingly, or unsurprisingly, Inuyasha did not return to them last night when she had decided to bed down, looking around now, she noticed that he still was absent. Raising a brow at Miroku, the monk only shrugged his shoulders before offering her some tea that should help with her clogged senses.

Sango had been the other mother hen of the pack, getting blankets and cushions to prop the ‘invalid' miko. Of course, she had all the help possible in the little Kit. Miroku just sat back and watched, knowing that there was nothing that he could do with the situation. Kagome understood their concerns, in this time even the smallest sickness could lead to death, and it was because she knew that they had very intimate knowledge of the fact that she allowed them to do as they thought necessary without protest.

Figuring that sitting and wallowing in her situation was not helping her in anyway, she decided to pass the time by thinking about the Demon Lord. That was always a pleasant topic to switch to. The smile that never failed to bloom on her face always tended to amaze her son, it made him happy that she was happy.

She thought back on the first time they had spent time alone, or as she would like to think of it as, their first official date.

It had been three days after he had originally requested an audience with her, he hadn't really been specific of what he wanted then and she was still highly confused. He had merely explained to her that he would like the opportunity to speak with her more, and that was it. After she had voiced her content (weighted by a heavy blush) he had merely nodded before escorting her back to the outskirts of her camp before leaving her altogether.

She hadn't known when (and if) he would be back and was taken by surprise when he gave a tug on the edge of her senses two days later. Advising Sango of her need for a walk, the young Miko left her camp to attempt to try and figure out what was happening around her.

Finding him awaiting her presence at the beginning of another clearing not too far off, she stopped before him. He nodded once in greeting before raising his hand in request of her own. When he received his answer, he gently led her into the warm clearing to sit on a fly rock by a tree; he himself sat on the forest floor beside her.

"I appreciate you agreeing to meet with me," he said, she knew that was as far as a ‘thank you' that she was going to get. "I know you have questions"

She looked at him and nodded before flying straight into the first and most important of them all. "What exactly is...happening" she asked, positively unsure how to word the request. Luckily for her, he nodded his understanding

"I would like to get to know you" he replied simply, "and I wish for you to get to know me also."

She furrowed her brows, "But why? What would come of this?" she paused, realizing how it must have sounded the launched right into damage control, "I mean its not that I don't want to get to know you, because that would be lovely- I guess, but- I- why me? Why now? What would await us at the end of this...journey?"

He looked at her for a long moment and she mistook it for her offending him, opening her mouth to shoot rapid-fire apologies, she was surprised when he put a finger to her lips to silence her.

"I would eventually, if all goes well and you would have me, like to formally ask your permission to court you." He paused at the widening of her eyes, allowing her to go over it in her head for a moment before continuing, "Also, if it continues to go well, I would like to make you my mate."

She gasped at this revelation, "But-but I'm human-" she argued, not believing what he was saying.

"Of that I am aware, but your species does not matter to me" he looked her dead in the eyes so she could see that he was indeed being serious. Her mouth hung suspended as she stared at him.

"I-I don't know what to say-uh" she stammered once more, her mind blank.

"Will you allow me the privilege to learn more about you?" he asked slowly, as if to break her out of her stupor.

"I-what if it doesn't work out?" she whispered to him, she needed to know how he would behave, what would happen if his plans for them did not work out, she didn't want to be the only one suffering from a failed relationship that she put her all into.

"I do not want to think of the possibility of it not ending in our favour" he replied. She nodded slowly. His face slowly melted of his mask as he accepted that she had accepted the fact that he wanted to be with her. He had promised himself to be more open to her if she had indeed accepted his suit.

"So how do we do this?" she asked, "Can I tell Sango?" he shook his head and her heart sank. He wanted it to be kept secret.

Sensing the downturn of her emotions, he cupped her chin for her to look at him. "I am not ashamed of you; however I have to follow tradition. And tradition dictates that until I formally ask you for permission to court, no one can know of our meetings."

"So why don't you ask me?"

"I cannot ask you until I know for sure that we will ‘work out' as you call it, I do however want to spend time with you"

She looked at him for a moment before looking away, "Where I come from, the male normally asks the female for permission to be with them, even if it is a pre courting ritual" she whispered, trying to both explain her fears of not being in an actual relationship (and possibly fearing commitment that wouldn't be) and dating to the Demon Lord.

Although he had already informally requested her hand, he decided to repeat himself just this once, for her. It was important to her and who was he to deny what she wanted most in life? Taking her hand in his, he tugged her to face him upon her rock and he looked deeply into her eyes, the blush that accompanied her embarrassment was charming to say the least.

"Miko Kagome, would you allow This Sesshoumaru the honour of getting to know you in the hopes of one day entering into a Courting?" the rouge on her cheeks intensified and for a moment he thought she had developed a fever, that was before she nodded once.

"Yes, you may" she whispered, the smile she bore threatening to crack her face in half, her eyes glistened and he had to wonder if humans always leaked water with their emotions or if it was just her.

"Thank you," he replied before placing a kiss on the back of her hand, to ‘seal the deal' so to speak.

They had spent the rest of the night enjoying each other's presence and learning about one another. It came as a shock to her when they saw the first rays of sunshine peeking out from the canopy of trees above them. It was then that Sesshoumaru had walked her back to the campsite promising to not keep her out so late in the future as he realised that while demons didn't need to sleep as often, humans needed their sleep every night. It was surprising for Kagome also since she hadn't at all felt tired while in his company, she just wanted to learn more about him. But once her head touched her sleeping bag she was out of it.

Shippou had woken up when she returned, she knew, but he hadn't said anything then. He had only brought it up further in the day when they had some time alone. Aft first he wanted to scold her for possibly putting herself in a bad situation, but when she begged him not to tell anyone, he knew just what it was that was happening. At his nod, the smile that had spread over her face had engulfed his entire being and made him feel so content, he decided then to allow it, if Sesshoumaru made his mother feel so wonderful about herself, then who was he to stand in their way?

They stayed like that until about noon, from the position of the sun, as that was when their fearless leader decided to show face. He came back looking more dishevelled than he was when he left and all who had eyes could see that he was doing some less than favourable activities with the undead miko. A shiver passed simultaneously through the group but went unnoticed by the enamoured Hanyou.

"What are ya doin' here lazing about? We got jewel shards to find!" he just about cursed, not even looking in the direction of their obviously under-the-weather miko companion.

"WE were waiting on you" Sango fired back, "and since you had decided that it was okay for you to have a short day of obvious debauchery, we decided it was okay not to break camp" the hanyou had the decency to blush, but that was over as soon as it started as he once again launched into a rant about stupid humans and such. No one paid him any attention as he stormed around kicking up dirt, they did however wonder when he was going to notice that his precious jewel detector was not feeling well. Some protector he was.

"Well? What are ya waitin' for? I'm back aren't I, now lets move!" he ordered, waiting for them to scramble to attention at his tone. He was disappointed however when they merely shrugged and went about their ways slowly. He noticed out of the group that Kagome wasn't doing anything and decided to let her know what he felt about the situation. "Hey wench? Why aren't you helping? Can't you see were tryin' to break camp here?" he barked.

Shippou rounded on him with a growl of his own, standing protectively in front of the lounging woman. "She's sick you moron, any idiot with half a brain could have seen that"

Inuyasha bristled at the comment but chose to say nothing; instead he scowled in their direction once and hoped into the nearest tree, waiting until the group was ready before providing his presence once more.


First chapter done. The scenes in italics are to be flashbacks of sorts, they will not always be preceeded by a 'warning' as they will be appearing very frequently within the course of the story. It is history so to speak, backstory if you will. It is the only way, other than the obvious thoughts by the characters that the relationship of Kagome and Sesshoumaru would be shown.

Urm....not sure if there is anything else that I need to explain, if theres anything that not clear to anyone, please dont hesitate to say it to me in either a review, pm, email whichever way you want. I'll try to explain everything clearly.

Soooo, tell me what you think!

much love!



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