Star-Crossed by Sem13

Scars, Stars, & Sake

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— Scars, Stars, & Sake — 

She felt like she was drowning.

The pointlessness of her own existence rose up and swelled around her like the tide swallows up the shore. A weight was tied to her heart and pulled her down into the deep murky waters of depression. But she no longer struggled with the feeling. Instead she was calm, had accepted her predicament, and allowed the gentle rhythm of the depths of her heart to lull her into a melancholy peace.

The sting of sweet sake warmed her throat and she inhaled sharply. With her reverie broken, she smiled — depression be damned. "Shit, I'm getting good at this. I could sell this batch…" She took another swig of her self-made sake and poked her lip out in a childish pout. A light breeze toyed with a strand of her hair and out of the corner of her eye she watched it dance back and forth. "Bored," She muttered to no one. Yet another swig washed down her throat. She sighed and her fingers lightly drummed her favorite bottle. Though it was exquisitely crafted, her favor was not owed to its beauty. Simply, the bottle was small enough to fit into her robes. 

She peered down at the rocky path that ended just below the smooth wooden porch on which she had taken repose. The assorted gravel contained a variety of stones of all shapes and sizes. Many had sharp, pointy edges. She ignored those and selected a smooth, rounded one smaller than her thumb. It settled into her palm and she took a long draught from her bottle, emptying it. "Ahhh…"

Seemingly of its own volition, the pebble instantly shot backwards over her shoulder, and punched a hole in the paper door of her home. A soft 'thunk' followed by a loud "Ow!" reached her ears. Giggles bubbled up in her chest when the door quickly slid open behind her and slammed shut. 

"Kagome! Are you drinking again?" 

Kagome turned around and looked at her little apprentice. The teenager, Tika, was red in the face. Her light brown eyes shone with a gentle anger and the girl began to scold her mirthful master, "I told you to lay off the stuff! You're an all powerful priestess dammit, you should act like one!" She snatched the pretty bottle from Kagome and held it upside down. Not a single drop fell to the floor. "Empty again?" Kagome smiled and nodded vigorously at Tika. "I suppose you want me to refill it? Pfft…" She thrust the bottle back into Kagome's hand. "I'm tired of enabling you, go get it yourself."

"Aww but Tika-chan, I'm thirsty!" Kagome's eyes flashed. She didn't care if Tika acquiesced or not, but she loved to mess with her. The girl was too serious. Too boring. Tika gave her a withering stare as if to say, Are you a child? Kagome puffed air in her cheeks and blew a raspberry as if to reply, Yes. Then she rolled her eyes and stood. "Fine, fine, I'll get it myself." Tika frowned, but made no attempt to delay her master as the woman walked off around the building.

A few minutes later Kagome sat back down with a full bottle and flushed cheeks. A little burp escaped her lips and she giggled, covering her mouth. Before filling her bottle, she had taken the opportunity to chug a cup right from the barrel, and what Tika didn't know wouldn't make her angry. "At least taste it for me." Kagome wiggled the bottle under Tika's nose. "Tell me what you think. I think it's marketable but I need a guinea pig. Pleeeaase?" She asked, dragging out the word as she begged for an opinion on her product.

Tika wrinkled her nose, "Fine, but if you want to sell it, you can't drink it all yourself." The apprentice took a sip. Then another. She mulled over the flavor a moment before taking a longer draw from the bottle. She finally answered Kagome, her tone somewhat surprised, "Wow. That is good. We could sell this for a pretty profit. And, if you were to bless it, we could use it as medicine." 

Kagome beamed proudly and snatched the bottle back, took a drink, and licked her lips. "Told ya so." She silently patted herself on the back and gazed up at the rapidly darkening sky.

Pinpricks of twinkling starlight began to dot the muted orange glow of the heavens. In the quiet of the evening, distractions were scarce. Gradually she felt the weight in her heart begin to drag her down once more. I might... go insane soon, she thought to herself. The human mind just wasn't meant to last as long as hers had, and now time was beginning to drive her mad. She tried to shake it off and swallowed more sake. 

Ahhh… There we go. What was I thinking about? She giggled again and clapped Tika on the back. "Why don't you grab some cups and a bigger bottle so we can celebrate my masterpiece?" she said, ignoring the warning from her apprentice not to drink it all before selling it.

Tika felt a strange mixture of pity and exasperation. "Fine,” she relented, “if I can't stop you, I guess it wouldn't hurt to join you — for now." Tika stood and walked to the door, "But if you don't stop pegging me with stones to get my attention, I'm dumping the whole damn batch."

Kagome sighed and laid back on the porch. Her hair sprawled out around her, and she considered vaguely that it might be time for a trim. Her hair had never been quite this long, but she couldn't really bring herself to care. What's the point? There's no men around here to impress anyway. She frowned and sat up, took yet another drink, and willed her heartache to drown in the alcohol.

Tika returned with a little table, cups, and a large, plain bottle. She sat down and set about pouring herself a drink. Her eyes slid over to her master. Tika knew why Kagome drank. Over the four years of her apprenticeship, her master had gotten drunk enough times to tell Tika her whole sad story. It was mostly just bits and pieces before the older woman inevitably passed out, but Tika was a bright girl and had put two and two together. She understood that Kagome was depressed and lonely. That time seemed to be a cruel curse to her teacher. "Master," Tika said respectfully this time, "maybe you should go visit someone, one of your old friends. You said there were still a few around, and it might make you feel better."

Kagome eyed the girl for a moment and shook her head. "Nope. Too depressing. They're off living their lives together," she said. Kagome was happy for them, but it hurt to see them so content while she withered away in loneliness. "Eh?" Kagome looked off to the east for a moment, as if something had peaked her interest. Who could that be?

Tika didn't seem to notice. "But drinking away your sorrow isn't healthy. Besides, it's unbecoming of a woman of your stature to be such a lush," she said. Tika began to take a sip from her cup, then startled, she spat it out uncontrollably.

A man had appeared in the yard a few meters away. As if out of thin air, he was just suddenly there, staring at them with indifferent, curious eyes.

Tika was immediately terrified. A cold, murderous aura emanated from the man. It rolled off of him in seething waves of yoki. A demon. Though he looked young, his long hair was pure white. The girl knew instinctively that this man was utterly deadly, and her fingertips glowed pink as she crouched defensively.

"Se-Sesshomaru?"

Kagome's unconcerned surprise rattled Tika and the apprentice glanced at her master out of the corner of her eye. Kagome sat up from the floor but her stance was otherwise relaxed. Why isn't she ready to defend herself?! Tika thought in distress.

"Sesshomaru! Oh it's so great to see a familiar face!"

Tika blanched. This was Sesshomaru? The Sesshomaru? The demon lord that had (on multiple occasions) intended to kill her master and the half-demon, Inuyasha? Tika kept her eyes on the powerful being. Kagome's getting tipsy, and this could get serious… Has she finally lost it?

Sesshomaru remained still and made no move to answer Kagome. He was staring at Tika, who still had her spiritual power at the ready. His deep amber eyes pierced the young apprentice with disdain. His flawless face however, revealed not even a shred of emotion. 

Meanwhile, Kagome had jumped up from her seat and began to approach Sesshomaru. She was elated. A familiar face! Even if it wasn't one she really wanted to see, she was still happy to see it. He looks just as he did. It's as if time never touched him, she thought.

Kagome smiled and stopped a few feet from him, surveying his attire. While the clothing she remembered had been elegant, it had seemed somewhat bulky on him. This outfit was almost the opposite. His haori was a pale blue, with delicate white clouds embroidered across the shoulders. The nagagi complemented the haori in a deep ultramarine. He wore it loosely, exposing his chest, as was the style in this era. He sported no armor, and the fluffy boa-like decoration he used to drape on his shoulder was gone. The hips of his simple, ash gray umanori were garnished with the deep blue crest of a flower inside a hexagon. He still seemed to favor odd leather boots, but was currently wearing a much slimmer looking pair.

Sesshomaru decided it wasn't necessary to keep an eye on Tika and looked to Kagome instead. He scrutinized her for a moment before he finally spoke, "How are you still alive?

The bluntness of his inquiry stung Kagome. I have no idea, and it's a living hell, she thought. Just moments ago she had been trying to forget about her unending life, so she ignored his question. "Would you like some sake? We just started! Please, won't you join us?" 

His lips twitched imperceptibly into a frown. "I am in haste. I noticed your presence here and decided to investigate it. Logic dictates that you should be dead. How are you still able to live? Answer me. Now." His tone brooked no argument, and his eyes flashed in the low-light of dusk, warning her that he had no time for games. 

Kagome pouted and crossed her arms. "I don't know, and I've been trying not to think about it." She could tell he was not pleased by this answer but he seemed to respect her desire to drop the matter.

"Then I shall leave." Sesshomaru would rather indulge his curiosity, but he had more important issues to attend. He turned away, but before he could take a step, he felt his near-empty left sleeve pull in her direction. He stopped. "It is not wise to touch me, human," he said without turning his head. His clothing gained no slack.

"Please stay. Just for a little while."

Her tone gave him pause. Though he was not in the habit of being in tune with his own emotions, he could read the feelings of others quite well, and her voice oozed sorrow and loneliness. Her sad whisper tugged a memory from the fathoms of his consciousness. He turned to look at her again and saw, for the briefest of moments, a dying old woman begging him to stay until her last breath. Perhaps by indulging her, I can deduce the reason for her long life myself. 

Kagome waited for an answer while simultaneously she wondered if this was it. If she had finally cracked and gone cuckoo. Of all people, he had to show up. Of course he'll never stay. He hates humans. I can't believe he hasn't tried to kill me yet. Kagome, you freakin’ fool, let go of his sleeve! But she couldn't bear the thought of a familiar person leaving before she had time to talk, even if it was brief — and with an old enemy. Her loneliness was all consuming, and at this point, she no longer cared if she died. To her surprise, he turned toward her home, and glanced at her out of the corner of his eyes. Realizing his intent, she immediately let go of his haori and gleefully clapped her hands. He'll stay! 

"Tika! Tika, pour him a cup. We can't have the lord waiting for his sake!" Kagome joked. Tika stared slack-jawed at her master, frozen to the spot. Kagome allowed her authority to surface, "Tika! Now, please." The little apprentice jumped and hurriedly poured a cup of sake for the demon. Kagome took the shallow cup with a grateful nod of her head.

Still wary of the situation, Tika began to voice her dissent, "Master, I don't think this is a go — "

Kagome cut the child off with a soft glare that said, Don't argue. "It's fine, he may be powerful, but I'm sure he won't harm his hosts. Sesshomaru has wonderful manners. If you don't like it, please go find something to do." Kagome's firm tone was rare for Tika, and the girl backed down. The apprentice bowed low to them both, still watching Sesshomaru with wary eyes, and stepped back into the house.

Kagome offered her sake to Sesshomaru and he accepted the drink with a nod, cradling the delicate cup in his right hand.

"There, now. How did you find me Sesshomaru?" Kagome sat on her stoop and flicked her long hair behind her shoulder. "You said you noticed my presence. How were you able to do that? I keep this mountain home of mine well hidden. Too many demons want me dead these days." She poured herself a cup and threw it back like a shot, while her guest sat gracefully a few feet to her right.

Sesshomaru was silent for a moment as he stared into the darkness and sipped from his cup. "I was traveling north and smelled spiritual power blanketing this mountain. I was unaware it was you until I saw you." His gaze settled on Kagome, and though the faint glow of light from the paper walls behind them was minute, he could see her clearly. She was the picture of youth — which should have been impossible for a human, as it had been nearly two hundred years since he had last laid eyes upon her. But, he thought, she has always been… peculiar.

Kagome huffed and pouted. "You smelled it. Of course you did. Those dog demon noses are really pesky. I wonder if other demons could smell it?" she thought aloud.

"No. I doubt anyone else could have found you."

"Why's that?"

"My father's line has always enjoyed a particularly powerful sense of smell. I have not heard of it in other lineages," he said.

"Oh. Well that's comforting… I suppose…"

Sesshomaru watched the priestess gulp drink after drink as she babbled on about how she met her apprentice or some such nonsense. He ignored most of it and instead scrutinized her in an attempt to discover the secret of her long life.

She was slightly older than he remembered, appearing to be about the age of twenty three, and by human standards, was admittedly quite beautiful. Her black hair hung very low, creating a dark pool on the porch. Her skin was smooth in appearance and lightly tanned, no doubt denoting time frequently spent outdoors, though not in laborious tasks. Hiding under thick black lashes, her eyes were a strange shade of bright blue — a trait practically unheard of in Japan. 

As far as Sesshomaru could see, nothing had really changed about her, except her clothes. Instead of the odd, scanty garb she wore when they first met, her dress was now that of a proper miko.

Sesshomaru frowned. She seemed no different than any other human miko, yet, here she was, alive and well two hundred years later. He could glean no clues as to her longevity from her appearance.

"...And I let her get away with murder around here now, so I apologize for Tika's rude behavior. She was only doing what I trained her to do." Kagome finished the story about her apprentice, and broke Sesshomaru's reverie.

"I see."

"How do you like the sake?"

"It is...adequate."

"Just adequate?" Kagome seemed deflated by his opinion.

"From whom did you procure it? I have never tasted its like before."

"Oh! Well I'll take that as a compliment — I made it myself." Kagome replied proudly.

"Hn..." Sesshomaru fell quiet again when a thought occurred to him. He mused on it for a moment. "What happened to the jewel?" he asked.

Kagome faltered, "Erk… about that…" The question caught her off guard. She didn’t think he'd cared much about the all powerful Jewel of Four Souls. "Well, after Naraku's defeat, I tried to make an unselfish wish on it to get rid of the thing once and for all, but…" Kagome put a hand on her breast and bowed her head in shame. "It must have been a selfish wish. Nothing happened, except that it disappeared inside my chest." She drank another cup and continued, "I think, maybe...it has kept me alive, for some reason." She frowned and muttered angrily, "Though I don't know what the hell for — hic!" She delicately covered her mouth then continued, louder, "All I do is exist! For hundreds of years, I've faithfully watched over this land, and not a single thing has attempted any unnatural harm." 

Sesshomaru felt her pain keenly. The only person he had ever truly cherished had passed away over a hundred years ago, and since then he had been listlessly carrying on with his life. Even his current endeavor, though important, seemed somewhat inconsequential against the weight of existing indefinitely in solitude.

"Everything that has happened was supposed to happen."

The whisper was so faint, a human couldn't have heard it. But Sesshomaru did. "What do you mean?"

"Huh? Oh, um… of course you heard that. Well I don't really think it could do any harm to tell you now…" Kagome tapped her chin. "So I'm uh, from — well I was from — I mean technically I still am — " Kagome sighed and then spit it out, "I'm from the future Sesshomaru." He chuckled. It was a deep, warm sound that Kagome had never suspected of him and she very nearly lost her seat. "Hey! I'm serious!"

"Priestess, that is rather a lading of ox excrement."

Kagome blinked at the demon. Was that…?

"Bullshit," he said.

Her laughter twinkled brighter than the stars, and in her mirth, Kagome spilled her sake. "Shit! Oh, look what you've made me do." She chuckled a little more and wiped her eyes. "I'm serious though. I was born in 1981 in Tokyo, the metropolis that Edo will be known as someday. On my fifteenth birthday, I was pulled into an old well by a demon, and transported through time. I don't know how or why. I used to think it was so I could help stop Naraku, but he's been dead so long now... and I'm still here." She threw back another cup. "God! Why am I still here?!" she wailed drunkenly.

Sesshomaru turned his face away. His mind was whirling. Something was different about this human. A mysteriousness surrounded her like the low fog of a cool morning. He agreed that her assumption about the jewel bequeathing her a long life made the most sense. But there had to be something else to it. She interrupted his thoughts again.

"I'm sorry. Look at me. Carrying on like that. I bet it's pitiful." Kagome gazed at him through bloodshot blue eyes, "Tell me, Sesshomaru, do you ever feel lonely?"

The demon lord paused and gazed into the amber liquid in his cup. Do I… feel lonely? His sleeve rustled and then Sesshomaru felt the warm, smooth touch of Kagome's fingers gliding across the somewhat regrown stump of his left arm. He instinctively jerked away from her grasp, but she held him firm.

"I always did feel so horrible about this…" she muttered. Then under the fabric of his sleeve, her hands began to glow. Sesshomaru felt an immense power seep into his bones at the end of the short appendage. He felt slightly dizzy, as one does in the heady warmth of the sun at midday. It was as if her power was meant to lull him into a state of relaxation. Logic told him this was somewhat alarming and he grasped for her throat to remove her, while his sake cup smacked the floor with a wet crash. Just before his hand closed around her neck, something indescribable made him stop. His hand fell limp, and his fingertips lightly brushed her skin instead. Sesshomaru waited in tense wonder as he felt the bones grow and muscle, sinew, and flesh began to sprout out of his stump and knit together until finally, his perfectly normal left arm lay cradled in the priestesses hands.

"Ahh… that's better. How does it feel?"

Sesshomaru was about to thank Kagome, but with her power gone from his body, suspicion rapidly clouded his mind. How did she — why would she do that? He snatched his arm away.

"What have you done, miko?"

"Wh-what?"

"I am grateful for this gift, but have done nothing to deserve it." His tone grew more belligerent.

"But I just wanted to — "

"I am now honor bound in a debt to you!" Sesshomaru was no longer pleased. He understood that he seemed ungrateful, but he had not stopped here to acquire a debt of honor. He growled low, "Why have you healed me?"

"H-hey wait a minute! I was just trying to help!" Kagome paled and scooted away from him. She waved her hands defensively, "Really! I felt like it was my responsibility."

"It was Inuyasha who removed my arm, not you. This was not your debt to pay."

"I'm sorry, Sesshomaru, I didn't think it would bother you so much. But you don't owe me anything. I don't want anything from you."

"I owe you a debt whether you wanted it or not. Now name it that I may be done with this and can leave."

Kagome reeled. His reaction had hurt. Of course she hadn't expected a whole production from the stoic man, but a simple 'thank you' would have been better than this. "But I don't really need… any… thing…" She trailed off. Sesshomaru glared at her impatiently. "Well actually, if you're insisting… then…" The demon growled at her again, insinuating that his patience was wearing evermore thin. "Then… let me travel with you."

—

— Author's Notes — 

-My apologies about the brief disappearance of this story. Apparently my notes were too long winded and it was removed cause I never check my messages.

-Don’t expect updates. Just let it be a fun little surprise if I do it. ‘Cause I’ve attempted a few fanfics before and only ever ended up writing a few chapters. I just get the urge every couple of years, and I really just use it to practice my writing. I like this story though, I want to finish it. But I’m a busy mom with a full time job. It just might take a while. Trust me, if I make an update schedule, the writing will suffer.

-Yes, Kagome is an alcoholic. She’s been alive and alone for almost 200 years. Somethings gotta snap. She’s rather high functioning, so it may seem like it doesn’t affect her much, but trust me it will.

-I will eventually explain what happened to everyone else. It’s just not pertinent right now.

-Also, I stopped reading Inuyasha around vol.22(?), and never finished the show, so my story is kinda stuck in a weird place before that. I’m basically cherry-picking the original work for source material.

-I would love some constructive criticism. I’m practicing my writing. Am I engaging you? Are the characters convincing? Am I staying within the correct tense? Am I too descriptive? Am I not being descriptive enough? How is my tone? I am a perfectionist and I tend to be a harsh critic, especially to myself, so I can’t really tell if my writing is any good. I’d appreciate any honest feedback on this!

-Obviously, as this is a fanfic site, I don’t pretend to own any of the source material.

— Sara