This is really beatiful! I like how you described exactly what part of each season reminds him of her. Don't apologize for your writing. It doesn't suck. You did a great job.

I really loved your descriptions comparing the attributes of Sesshomaru's mate to the seasons.  They were simple yet very descriptive.

My only comment would be the author's note at the end. Dokuga is a place that you should feel safe to post your writing without fear of harsh criticism. If you don't feel confident about what you're writing, ask for honest feedback from your readers. Remember, Dokuga prides itself for being a place you can ask and get good, constructive responses from their readers. You can even post something in the forums. I've seen any number of writer's post a self-promotion asking for feedback.

Again, this was a beautiful read!