Ikaru (Chapter 4) - Thu 11 Sep 2014

Very interesting with the fip-floping point of view. It was interesting to see their initial take on each other as well. I would love to see this continued and see how they come to achknowledge one other.


insomniac_amy (Chapter 4) - Mon 01 Sep 2014

I love the way you go back and forth giving us her immediate impression of him and his first impression of her. Giving us little glimpses into what they are each thinking.  It sounds like they both are instantly attracted to each other, but unsure whether they like it or not. Good job.


bookgirl813 (Chapter 4) - Sun 31 Aug 2014

An interesting start of something.  Both characters are anticipating something and when they come in contact, they each have such different responses.  I like how you've conveyed their views of one another in their own minds.  Intriguing!


Michelle (Chapter 4) - Fri 29 Aug 2014

Ahhh. Poor Jakken. Would love to see some dialogue if continued. :)


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