| Ooh chocolate :)! Nice. Oh, also, remember to put capitalized letters when starting a new sentence. I noticed when you wrote people's thoughts that you forgot to capitalize the first word. This sentence is a sentence from your story which I am using as an example: ' well I guess that I won't be seeing them any time soon. Oh well I'll be able to relax for at least one day with out interruptions.' You SHOULD capitalize the word "Well" I noticed at least 4-5 sentences that did not have the first word capitalized. Other than that its pretty interesting :)
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