I was thoroughly entertained by this story. I am glad that I didn't figure out the killer until a chapter before it was revealed. Your method for coming up with this story is awesome. For some reason i find the whole im a killer you're killer conversation funny...in a twisted only in fiction kind of way. Thanks for such a great story. 

Absolutely love it!!!!

Since not sense. Aisle not isle. Manners not manor. Barren not baron. 

Storywise the plot is engaging, but the little tiny mistakes takes out the pleasure in reading. I suggest you get a beta-reader who can iron out the kinks. I wanted to give you a more comprehensive review filled with flowery words, but my mind is not really into it. So yeah,

Yanno... I just read this again cuz it seemed like a good idea and srsly, it's an awesome story... but that ending >.> COME ON DUDE YOU CAN'T JUST LEAVE IT AT THAT!!!!! Srsly i think you should do a one shot, with a LOT of citrus... just because it would be awesome lol. Great job though!

I liked your story. It was intriguing, although I have to say it reminded me greatly of the movie Seven, so much to the point where I could tell something like the ending was coming (Jakotsu was actually who told me it was Bankotsu. I could follow the similarities between this story and the movie Seven and then knew there would be a link to someone in the police department just as Brad Pitt's character's wife was killed because of her connection with the murderer that made Bankotsu the most likely suspect. Guess I'm weird for not using that to say it couldn't be Bankotsu. Guess I've just read too many mystery books). I liked the part about Sesshoumaru and the connections to him being the reasons the others were killed. That was an interesting tidbit. I was also very intrigued by trying to figure out how you were going to bring Sesshoumaru and Kagome together if he was trapped in prison. I do believe that there should have been either a little more development between them, or at least give Kagome more reaction to him because at the moment it doesn't seem like they are remotely close enough to have the ending you gave them. I questioned whether you'd kept Sesshoumaru and the like as youkai, but then I decided no since things would have been settled much differently (Inuyasha being taken out by a truck for instance. In his hanyou form, that wouldn't have put him in a coma.). However, if this is the case, I would suggest taking out the idea that the killer is trying to create a body from the pieces of the victims. It creates too much of a mystical tone for the story and if you're not leaning towards mysticism in your story then it would be wise to just alter that to some other reason. Also, you have lots of gramatical errors that need to be fixed. You might want to have someone else edit your stories for you if you have trouble noting your own errors. For example, it is spelled  "since" not "sense." "Since" means from the past to now, or sometimes because. "Sense" is used as in common sense, and is used to reference knowledge. There are also a lot of errors where you used the wrong letter in a word. So, like instead of "head" you said "heat." Errors such as these made it difficult at times to understand what you meant. 

Sorry if this review sounds harsh. I have a degree in English with a focus in Creative Writing and so I can't help but critique things I read. I really did enjoy the idea for your story and I feel that it could be really great. It just needs a little work to get it there.

Wow, this was such an awesome psychotic thriller. it's so hard to find original and creative AND well written plotlines anymore. I fell in love with Tashio the moment you described him in his cell and every encounter after.

Now i really Really REALLY love this story so far cause its all CSI and i love that kinda stuff but i found an error

"Kagome took out the papers and placed them though the slot. “Two more deaths. Kagura Onigumo and Hakudoushi Yari. Wrath and sloth this time"

Sloth should be envy in chapter 4. All in all great going *thumbs up*

Freaking awesome.  I was a bit bored at the beginning, because it was so close to the movies... but you did a great job of twisting up the ending!  Sweet job!

Hahahaha

Nice ending!

Ahhh! So wrong to end the story like that! lol Great job! i really enjoyed reading your story Kai. :)

ROFL! best ending sentence! bravo i enjoyed it very much.

Such a.... teasing way to end it... naughty naughty :p 

I really loved this story... it was thrilling and thought provoking at the same time... i love a good mystery!!

Entity

IT WAS WONDERFUL! I wish it wasn't over!

hahaha loved that ending!

OH HE** to the NO! I can't just sit back and let you end it like that! I want to see her reaction, not to mention the lemon!!!! Even if it's a one-shot for it I so want to know more OH how i LOVED IT!! hope to see more from you soon!

hugs and puppies

Ok at the end that was Hot on what Sesshomaru said!! I knew that he was not telling her the whole truth!!! "My dear detective, you misunderstood me. When I meant I was going to break you, I meant your body. I intend to fuck you will you break. And then I’ll pick up the pieces and do it all over and over again.”

OK that was an amazing line, and I was so blushing and laughing at the same time, oh please you have to make another chapter with a lemon!!! or a Lemon Chapter, I want to read how he is going to break her!! lol, oh please now you have to. LOL.

GREAT!! story, it was amazing and I loved every bit of it, it was a fun ride and it was amazing!!! I loved ever bit of the story,!! I do hope you make other stories!!, and I hope you make a lemon!!! of this story!!!.

Hugs

Megan007

-_~

The last line was a really good closer. Excellent job on the story. You getting a standing "O" from me.

very well done, Kai!

ah-hahahahaha that ending was great! I still wish it could've been longer though since it was such a great story! Awesome job Kai and i can't wait to see what you come up with next!!!