The constant change of POV's really turned me off for a good bit of the reading and then most of the sex scenes felt like a over thought porno with a bit to frequent of them. The plot was rather enjoyable, I had noticed that your writing style definitely went through improvements as the chapters went.
The characters were quite different then their norm, the relationship rushed at the start, and the story a bit rushed in areas. I'm not a bit fan of the multiple POV's in a single chapter and then the switch of whose's POV in the next, it was like throwing a marble in a glass jar only to shake it wildly. Not a pretty sound or sight, almost like nails on a chalkboard. A word of advice, if you use POV, stick to only one character's POV the whole series otherwise stay with the third person POV. Readers wouldn't have to play the guessing game of 'Who's POV is it this time?' game.
Besides that bit that didn't rub me right, the story was a nice read [honestly, I had to stop a few times to stop raging at the POV changes, lol]. I'll have to give your other work a look over and see what else you have. [I rate this a 6/10.]
marisel (Chapter 21) - Sat 03 Nov 2018
For the first story you did really good. But you stop... Why??? Very talented writer should cultivate the gift. So... Write another one and used not narrative tactics and you would do well.????????????????????????
Faith (Chapter 21) - Thu 01 Nov 2018
I enjoyed this story. Thanks for writing & sharing it.
Nilee1 (Chapter 1) - Wed 31 Oct 2018
What a great story! I absolutely love it.
this story was awesome loved it .thank you so much i hope you make more .
What an amazing stories!!!! So happy it was finished!
Finally I'm done! Dang, I was sleepy as hell this morning when I went to work. I like this story, but to be honest, it's a little bit childish. But again I'm not going to complain about it 'cause it thoroughly entertains me. Thank you for writing this story, Author-san :D I can't wait to read more stories from you!
Woahhh is it just me or what? But my bedroom is quite hot and steamy right now... damn you sesshomaru! I almost got nosebleed, for real.
This story was awesome :)
Just read the first chapter and I already wanted to smack Inuyasha into oblivion. Dang I'm so excited to continue reading this. Oh well I can see myself having panda eyes tomorrow morning lol
Minime (Chapter 21) - Mon 29 Oct 2018
Well. I binge read this. I wasn't able to get anything done at work, but totally worth it. Glad I read your story. Looking forward for your next projects.
Yeah! You're over here now. I was reading this on FF; but, I guess I'll be finishing it on this site. Which is just fine with me.
Amber (Chapter 1) - Sun 28 Oct 2018
I love this story!! I was very well written and I really like the character change through out the story. I really look forward to reading some of your other story in the near future.
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