Things Sesshomaru Would Never Say (or One Righteous Piece of Poon)
By Omizumaru & MoMoDesu
Inuyasha looked around the strange room with white walls and plushy purple chairs. What he was doing here he didn't know; one moment he was arguing with his brother and BAM! The next second he was here. Instead of tearing the room to pieces like he would normally do he calmly sat down in one of the chairs. After half an hour and nearly an entire jug of water from the water dispenser later his reason for being there walked into the room.
"Kagome! About damn time! Where the fuck am I?"
Kagome walked up to him and sat across from him. "Inuyasha, this is an intervention."
He crushed the little cone shaped paper cup in his hand. "A what?"
She looked towards the door. "Sesshoumaru, please come in here."
Inuyasha watched with wide eyes as his brother strode in and confidently took a seat next to HIS miko and kissed her on the cheek.
"What the fuck?" Inuyasha exclaimed.
"Sesshoumaru and I have been sleeping together for months." Kagome stated plainly.
"Yeah," Sesshomaru said smugly. "I hit that."
Inuyasha's mouth dropped open.
"We are very content in our relationship." Kagome continued as though Sesshomaru had not interrupted.
"Yeah, I have a taste for miko snatch." The taiyoukai gave his brother an altogether lascivious grin.
There was no way that Sesshomaru was actually saying those things!
"We thought it would be best if we sat you down and told you in a neutral environment."
"Too bad you never got any, since you have a taste for dead miko."
Inuyasha was livid and his face was scarlet. "What the!"
"Inuyasha, don't interrupt," Kagome chided him, like a mother would a small child wagging her finger at him for emphasis.
"She's a righteous piece of poon." Sesshomaru winked at the hanyou.
"And we have come to the conclusion that you need to let go."
"I tire of sneaking around for a piece of ass. I wish to have the freedom to tap her ass whenever I desire."
Kagome gave Sesshomaru a light and playful punch to his arm and he flashed her a hentai grin. Smiling at Inuyasha she concluded, "I am happy. Please be happy for me!" She stood with the older demon and they calmly left the room, the taiyoukai's hand resting comfortably on her left butt cheek, an angry Inuyasha left behind.
He looked down at his hand. "Well, Rosie, I guess it's you and me again tonight."