Disclaimer: Inuyasha and all of its characters belong to Rumiko Takahashi. The author, Aubrey Simone, retains all rights to any original characters and does not profit from the writing or posting of this piece.
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She hadn't wanted to do it. But what other options did she have? None of the village men wanted her—she was too outspoken, too independent. The women had tried to help her, had tried to tell her that she had to quiet down; how else would she find a good husband if she didn't learn to be submissive?
It was already bad enough that the village miko, a stern woman named Katsume, had deemed her hopeless in the ways of the miko—she couldn't meditate for the life of her and Katsume was positive that her potential was better off wasted. "The effort it would take to train you would kill me!" she'd exclaimed a few moments before shooing the diminutive woman away from the shrine. "Go, girl, and gray someone else's hair!"
Unfortunately, she had no other skills either—her cooking, with the exception of basic rice, was disastrous, she couldn't work a needle and thread, and her singing voice sounded like the croaking of a toad. She couldn't dance, hadn't learned to play any instruments, and although she was adept at reading and arithmetic, no one was impressed by those types of skills.
Of course, all of her talents—or lack thereof—could be ignored if only she would find a man who simply enjoyed her company. And therein lay the problem, because she wasn't the type to sit and simper. Her father had taught her that she was a respectable woman just the way she was, and her mother had forbade her to fall into the life of complacency she herself had stumbled to. Their combined teachings kept her from being quiet when men argued about things she herself had an opinion on, and she personally despised smiling and nodding like she was expected to—she was an intelligent woman, after all, and she enjoyed being heard.
And so, because it simply wasn't in her nature to be the woman that the men of her village wanted to marry, she came to a conclusion—she would offer herself to Lord Sesshomaru, the youkai lord whose lands her village was built on. He was an honorable ruler, firm and demanding only when he needed to be. He was a little cold—she had never seen him smile—but she supposed he couldn't go around grinning at everyone, and she didn't think that he would be averse to having another concubine. What was one more added to the eleven he already owned?
Mind made up, Higurashi Kagome, untrainable miko and unmarriageable village woman, hefted the day's rice harvest up into her arms, securing her grip on the basket's handles before setting off toward the gathering of huts just ahead. The walk was easy—after nearly twenty years of harvesting rice, she'd become resilient—and she entered the village to smiles and respective nods from the people she'd known all her life.
There was old Jini, the man who'd taught her everything she knew about the land, and his wife Saka, who was the grandmother she never knew. Daisuke, one of the few young men who put up with her—though only because they'd been friends for a long time and he was already thinking of marrying another village girl—waved from his position atop his family's roof, a hammer in his hand. She stopped, craning her neck up to look at him.
"Daisuke-san, what are you doing up there?"
The young man waved a bronzed arm, gesturing vaguely to the space behind him. "I was repairing a leak. My mother remembered that it needed to be fixed, so I decided to do it before the next rain." He grinned at her. "And you, Kagome-san? What are you doing? Isn't it a little early for you to be back?"
The woman shrugged, and then nearly dropped her basket as Daisuke slid from the roof, dropping down in front of her. "Don't do that! You could've gotten hurt!" She huffed and rolled her eyes at his nonchalant shrug, and then hefted her basket up onto her head, relieving some of the strain on her arms. "And I'm going to speak with Tanaka-sama," she added in response to his earlier question.
One of Daisuke's dark brows rose. "Oh?" Kagome nodded. "And what do you need to speak with him about?"
Kagome slowed to a stop as she considered the curiosity in his brown gaze. Pursing her lips, she decided that he was trustworthy—he'd been her friend for too long for her not to trust him, and she knew he wouldn't think her silly for her solution to her marriage problems. Daisuke's expression morphed into worry when she stared at him for too long, and she shook her head. "Promise you won't tell anyone, not even Jini- and Saka-san?"
After a moment, Daisuke nodded, and, although he was frowning, lifted a hand and laid it over his bare chest. "I swear it."
Kagome nodded, and then stepped closer and whispered her plan into his ear. When she stepped back to look at his face, his eyes were comically wide, and his mouth had fallen open in complete shock. "B—but Kagome-san, that's—"
"Shh!"
He scowled. "That's crazy!" he continued quietly, following her as she spun and continued her journey toward the village head's hut. "You can't be serious!"
Kagome sighed. "Daisu-kun, I know that it doesn't seem like a good idea," she murmured, weaving around a crowd of men headed back to the fields. "But it's the only option I have left."
Daisuke was silent for a long moment, and then, surprising her, he grasped her arm and pulled her through the huts and around to the back of the small inn. Wrinkling her nose at the scent of horse manure and carefully setting her bucket of rice at her feet, Kagome stared pointedly at him, watching as he composed himself before speaking. "It's not your only option," he said lowly, running a hand through his dark hair. He opened his mouth to say something else, but almost immediately closed it and rubbed the back of his neck, a blush staining his tanned skin. She frowned, confused, and then felt her mouth fall open as his sudden nervousness and the topic of their conversation settled in.
"Daisuke, I can't—"
"Why not? I've always been here for you, haven't I? I'll be a good husband, I swear it!"
Kagome shook her head, floored. There was no way he meant what he was saying! Sure, they'd been friends since they were five, but that didn't mean that she could marry him! She wasn't really attracted to him, at least not romantically, and even he got tired of her mouth sometimes! Not to mention—"Suki." Her thought finished itself aloud before she realized it, but at the expression that passed over his face, she spoke again. "What about Suki? She thinks you're going to marry her."
Daisuke's expression turned pleading. "She'll understand! Please, Kagome? I would never forgive myself if I—"
"No, Daisuke. I can't! Don't you understand? I'm not fit to be anyone's wife!"
"So you'll be some demon's concubine? Kagome, you deserve better than that!" He grabbed her shoulders, shaking her lightly. "He'll hurt you, Kagome," he whispered, worry etched into his face.
"You don't know that, Daisuke."
"And you know that he won't?" She nibbled her bottom lip, unable to respond. Daisuke sighed, bowing his head. "I know that I can't stop you," he mumbled, fingers flexing on her shoulders, "but I wish I could."
He released her, and then turned his back and walked away, leaving her alone. Kagome frowned at his figure until he turned a corner, and then shook herself and bent to pick up her basket. She wasn't going to let his sudden show of emotion deter her from her plan—it was her life, and she could do what she wanted with it.
She stopped at her hut, leaving the basket just inside the door before continuing up to the head elder's hut. The old man was seated outside, a pipe between his lips and an expression of serenity on his face. Respectfully, she stopped a few feet away and bowed, remaining silent until he acknowledged her.
"Ah, Kagome, a pleasure to see you," he said, voice gentle and gravelly. "What is it that you require?"
Kagome wrung her hands. "I—I wanted to talk to you about something that—that I wanted to do." The elder nodded, and then patted the space beside him. Kagome accepted the offered seat, settling on the step and gazing into Tanaka-sama's watery brown eyes. He was patient, and Kagome worked up the courage to begin. "As I'm sure you know," she murmured quietly, "I have yet to marry, even though I'll be one-and-twenty when sun rises tomorrow." Tanaka nodded, motioning for her to continue as he puffed on his pipe. "So, I've decided to go to Lord Sesshomaru's shiro."
"Lord Sesshomaru's shiro?" Tanaka repeated. Kagome nodded. "And what business will you find there?"
Now, it was one thing to tell Daisuke, whom she talked to about everything, that she was going to become a concubine, but it was another to say such a thing to a respectable man such as Tanaka. She cleared her throat, averted her gaze, and clasped her hands in her lap. "He…he requires a twelfth," she mumbled, praying that he'd heard her and wouldn't need her to repeat herself.
The silence stretched on for so long that she began to fear that he really hadn't heard her. She looked back up, and just as she opened her mouth, Tanaka fixed her with a searching gaze. She sat perfectly still, somewhat unnerved by the knowledge in the old man's eyes. He smacked his lips, pulled from his pipe, and then nodded. "Very well."
"But Tanaka-sama, I—very well?"
An amused expression filtered over the weathered face. "Yes, very well." She couldn't find it in her to push past the shock and speak; after all, Tanaka had been very protective of her since the night her parents died, and she'd expected much more resistance. The elder reached across and laid a gnarled hand on her shoulder. "You are a grown woman now, Kagome," he said, "though it honors me that you would seek acceptance from these old bones."
"You're not old, Tanaka-sama," Kagome said automatically, smiling.
"Oh, I am very old, my dear," he responded, continuing on the previous subject before she cold interject. "However, be advised, Kagome," he warned solemnly. "You may be well cared for as the twelfth, should Lord Sesshomaru accept you, but the price you will pay will be a great one."
For a moment, Kagome considered his words. She knew that being the concubine of Lord Sesshomaru was a very high honor—in all the centuries he had been ruling, he had only taken eleven, and had never dismissed any of them, unlike other ruling lords who took many and dismissed them just as easily. Lord Sesshomaru's concubines were said to be the most beautiful, and because he took care of them so thoroughly, they never strayed and sang his praises to any who would hear.
However, being a concubine was more than simply being taken care of. It was giving oneself over to the will of another, and in Kagome's case, giving her virginity to a demon. She had nothing against the race, unlike some other humans, and although she'd wanted her first time to be special, she already knew that any hopes of flowers and romantic words were long gone.
The real question was this: could she give up something so precious, and then not get too attached to the one whom had taken it from her?
"You have much to think about, Kagome." Tanaka's voice startled her out of her thoughts, and she nodded absently before standing, bowing, and leaving the elder to his day.
It was dawn when she made up her mind, and after much consideration, she wrote a short letter to Daisuke, informing him of her decision. She promised that she would come back if Lord Sesshomaru rejected her, and asked that he not worry overmuch. Knowing that he would keep where she was going a secret, she made sure to ask that he took care of her home, and told him that it was his if he ever decided to marry Suki. She signed it with love, and then rolled the parchment up and gathered the rest of her things.
She ate breakfast and packed a light lunch, carefully wrapping her best kimono before slipping it into a pack and leaving her hut. For a moment, she stared at the building, remembering what it was like when her parents were both alive, and then squared her shoulders and walked away. Her horse, a chocolate brown mare that she had helped birth a few years before, nudged against her shoulder as she neared the stables. Smiling and patting the animal's nose, she saddled and secured her pack before grabbing the reins and quietly leading her over to the hut Daisuke shared with his mother.
It was getting brighter by the second, and knowing that everyone would be getting up soon to begin their day, Kagome hurried, left Daisuke's letter on the front stoop where she was sure he would see it, and then mounted her horse and began the ride to the Western Shiro.
'This is the best thing for me now,' she thought, determination lighting her features as the sun rose higher in the sky.
Daisuke, missing her by a little less than fifteen minutes, read her letter with a grim expression. He prayed to the kami that she would be safe.
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Author's Note: Yep, something new. I'll try to update this once every week (today is Thursday where I am, so whatever day it is where you are, today is the update day for my new baby), but please be patient with me, seeing as I have a real life and may not be able to update on time every single week.
Anyway, please let me know what you think!
p.s. - I'll update Legacy on Saturday (the day after tomorrow) so be on the lookout for that! Also, if it wouldn't be too much to ask, could a few of you please take a look at Sincerely Serendipitous. It's my response to sugar0o's Love Letters To... Challenge, and I'd love to know what you all think of it!
~Aubrey