Inside Out by dreamcatcher

Inside Out

Disclaimer: I own nothing but my plot. I don´t own the figures of Inuyasha by Rumiko Takahashi and I don´t own the song „Inside Out“ by Bryan Adams.

~~~

A/N: This is my first oneshot and my first song-fic. I heard this song a while ago after many years and got this idea in my head. I hope you like it. My other stories will be continued soon, but I needed this little fluff between, so please bear with me. I apologize if they are too OCC.

A/N: This is done with my fantastic Beta Firehauke, thank you, love!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

It as a warm new moon night, only the light of the stars was illuminating a little clearing in the middle of japan´s great forests. The group of shard hunters was sitting comfortable around a little fire, their stomachs full they relaxed from the past days adventures.

A few months ago the Western Lord and his little pack had joint them. A truce was made in attempt to take down the evil hanyō. While his half-brother was not happy about this, their true alpha, the little female from the future, and the rest of their pack had decided to take this chance.

The children were long gone to sleep between the legs of the huge two-headed dragon while the adults were sitting together and talked quietly. Inuyasha, forced to endure his monthly night of humanity, sat beside his best friend, and pouted. Jaken was laying on his back beside the children and snored softly.

Out of earshot, but in sight of the others the tall inu sat at the foot of a giant tree situated at the edge of their camp´s clearing, staring up to the star filled sky. No one dared to disturb him and yet the miko found herself turning from time to time to look at the silent figure.

He was always sitting alone on the sideline, but today something was different. Something about his aura seemed to shout to  Kagome that the Western Lord was lonely.

Rising to her feet she made to move to him when a normally clawed hand grabbed hers. Smiling down at her friend she squeezed it, loosening her hand from his grip and went to the stoic creature. She quietly waited for him to notice her. Finally his golden gaze left the stars and locked with her blue ones.

"May I sit down, Sesshōmaru-sama?" she quietly asked, patiently waiting for his answer. At his slight nod she went to his side and sat gracefully down. "Excuse me for disturbing you, but you seemed to be so sad..."

~~~

the biggest lie you ever told - your deepest fear 'bout growin' old

~~~

"Tell me, miko, what was the biggest lie you´ve ever told?" he asked instead of answering her, again looking up to the stars.

"The biggest lie?" She frowned slightly. Unsure whether she should answer him or not, she fought for a moment with herself. Then she came to the decision that she would simply answer his question. Maybe he had a reason for asking her and maybe she would get the chance to learn something about him tonight.

"Well..." Looking over to her hanyō friend she sighed. "I think it was when I told them it didn´t hurt when he goes to see her." Her voice was so soft that he would have difficulty understanding her, had he been human. "What about you?"

"Do you fear growing old?" Still not responding to her he asked again.

"Yes and no. I think my biggest fear is that I would still be alone," Leaning her head like him against the rough bark of the tree behind them. "Sometimes I see myself, old, lonely and surrounded with cats."

"Cats?" Frowning, he finally looked down at the small female at his side. She simply nodded, not wanting to explain this modern idea. The lord leaned his head back again. "Tonight, about 300 years ago I told my biggest lie."

"What was it?" Fixing her gaze at his face she held her breath, not believing what he just said.

"On this night my mate and my newborn pup were killed by my uncle and I told him that I didn´t fear being alone." He whispered, looking down at his clawed hands. "Now I know that it was not true. I will grow old and I´ll be alone... That day I became ice."

"Oh, Sesshōmaru-sama," she whispered and looked at him with tear filled eyes. "I´m so sorry!"

~~~

the longest night you ever spent - the angriest letter you never sent

~~~

"It was the longest night I´ve ever spent, first searching for them, then fighting for them." His gaze still downcast he went on. "But I was too late! I was too late because I was too proud to tell her how much she meant to me."

"It must have been so painful." Kagome said under her breath, tears streaming down her face.

"Hn..." He turned slightly to her and took her tiny hand carefully in his big, calloused one. "I found a letter the morning afterwards, it was such an angry letter, where she told me that for once she wished I had opened up to her."

~~~

the boy you swore you'd never leave - the one you kissed on new year's eve

~~~

"Give me other thoughts, miko." The regal lord looked down at her for a second. "Do you still love my brother? Is he the one, the one you kiss at the brink of a new year?"

"Eep!" She jumped, a little bit startled, and blushed, but then, she had decided to be honest with him tonight. It seemed that he had decided the same, so she answered, not noticing that her hand was still held in his. "No, I don´t think I love him anymore. A heart can only be broken so much, till nothing is left. I gave him chance after chance, but now... No, I don´t love him anymore."

~~~

the sweetest dream you had last night - your darkest hour, your hardest fight

~~~

"But he was your sweetest dream..." The inu at her side whispered gripping her hand a little bit thighter.

"He was..." Kagome nodded. "But he was also the reason for my darkest hours." Closing her eyes for a moment she then looked up to the stars. "My hardest fight," she started, "My hardest fight was and is not the fight against Naraku." Turning her head slightly she looked in those frozen gold. "My hardest fight was to prove Inuyasha that I´m not Kikyo and will never be."

"I understand that." His hand gave hers a soft squeeze. "Mine was on that night. I had to kill my own uncle, the man that watched over me all the time my father couldn´t. All the while knowing that my pup and my love were already dead..."

~~~

I wanna know you - like I know myself

I'm waitin' for you - there ain't no one else

talk to me baby - scream and shout

I want to know you - inside out

~~~

"I never thought that you had to undergo so much." The little female said, crying those tears he couldn´t.

"But I found hope again..." Sesshōmaru said softly. Careful with his claw his thumb whisked the tears from her cheek. "Talk to me, Kagome. I want to know you. All this time, I´ve been waiting for you. No one was ever able to melt the ice, till you came into my life. Even if you scream at me, shout. Please, I want to know you, inside out."

Her breathing caught at his words. Her eyes went wide. She couldn´t believe his words. Behind them the rest of the group was settling to sleep. Sango was calling for her. When young woman made to stand, his hand tightened its grip.

~~~

I wanna dig down deep - I wanna lose some sleep

I wanna scream and shout - I wanna know you inside out

I wanna take my time - I wanna know your mind

ya know there ain't no doubt - I wanna know you inside out

~~~

"Stay," he said softly, capturing her eyes with his. "Spend this night with me, sleep can come later. Never before I felt so much like... like screaming, shouting... talking... Tell me what´s on your mind."

"But..." Hesitating she looked first at him and then at her waiting friends. "Why?"

"As I said, I want to know you, inside out." He tucked at her hand, made her look at him. "All of you, I want to spend my life getting to know you. Tell me what´s on your mind. You are the hope I´ve found." Something in the way he looked at her, in his words made her sit down again.

While his face was as always, his eyes seemed to have softened. The miko couldn´t point out why she knew that he told her the truth. For some reason unknown to her the Western Lord, the most feared and most beautiful demon of all time, one of the great daiyōkais, Sesshōmaru, wanted to know her.

"But will you answer my questions, too?" she asked and he nodded. The camp before them sank into silence.

~~~

the saddest song you ever heard - the most you said with just one word

~~~

"What was it that you heard at the saddest moment of your life?" He whispered, his eyes never leaving hers.

"It was a song from my time..." She had to smile at that memory. "It played all that day in my head when I found him for the first time alone with her." Casting her gaze down she inhaled deeply. "What was the most you said with one word?"

"Mine." His other hand went up, the inu softly grabbed softly her chin and caressed her lower lip with his thumb. She blushed deeply, her gaze transfixed on his handsome face.

"Yours?" she asked, her voice shaking, hope coloring it. Her question earned her another nod.

~~~

the loneliest prayer you ever prayed - the truest vow you ever made

~~~

"When were you so lonely all you could do was pray?" came his next softly spoken question. She felt as if his gaze had transfixed her to this spot beside him. It seemed to her as if his face came closer and closer.

"The day my father died." The female whispered. Suddenly she had difficulties breathing and wondered if it was the same for him. "Did you ever make a real true vow?"

"I´ll never fail again," his lips brushed hers, a soft, swift movement against her lips. Never closing their eyes they held the others gaze. "I´ll never hold back my feelings for my love again."

~~~

what makes you laugh, what makes you cry what makes you mad, what gets you by

~~~

"What... what does it take to... to get a real laugh from you?" Desperately trying to keep her sanity for this couldn´t be true she stammered her next question.

"Don´t tell anybody," the dai suddenly smiled, making his beautiful face almost divine. "But when Rin covers Jaken in flowers, I nearly can´t hold myself from laughing." She too had to smile at the thought of this. "What, apart from my foolish brother, is a true reason for crying?"

"The thought of loosing you." Deciding to risk it all this time, it was her lips that brushed his. Their erratic breaths mingled. "Have you ever been really mad?"

"Whenever Naraku attacks you." This time he truly kissed her, softly, gently and so breathtaking. "What captivates you?"

~~~

you highest hight, your lowest low - these things I want to know

~~~

"Your voice." Still breathless she returned the favor of his kiss and let him pull her on his lap. Kagome felt how his strong arms circled around her waist, holding her as close as possible. "Your highest high?"

"Finally being able to hold you." Bending forward Sesshōmaru kissed her, nibbled at her lower lip his eyes never leaving hers. "Your lowest low?"

"When I thought you loved Kagura." Her answer made her blush beet red and earned the miko a soft chuckle. She felt him tightening his grip, the warm of his body radiating through their clothing.

~~~

I wanna know you - like I know myself

I'm waitin' for you - there ain't no one else

talk to me baby - scream and shout

I want to know you - inside out

~~~

"But it wasn´t her that caught my heart, Kagome." He whispered between gentle kisses. "I want to know you, all of you. I want to know everything about you until I know you like myself. I´ve been waiting for this for so long. I hoped you would finally get over him and come to talk to me, even if I had to get you mad at first, make you scream and shout at me."

As he kissed her the next time his tongue grazed over her lips, begging for entrance, which she willingly gave him. For a short moment they simply held each other and kissed until both of them had to break the kiss for some air. Looking at each other, they sat there slightly panting.

~~~

I wanna dig down deep - I wanna lose some sleep

I wanna scream and shout - I wanna know you inside out

I wanna take my time - I wanna know your mind

ya know there ain't no doubt - I wanna know you inside out

~~~

"Let me deep inside your mind," he suddenly sounded pleading. "This night I´ll willingly deny sleep if it means you will finally accept me." His hands caressing her face, hers entangling in his, he bend down to capture her lips again. "Every time I see him near you I want to yell at him, every time he touches you I want to tell him that you are mine. Let me get to know you."

"But why me?" her eyes filled with tears. Unsure if his feelings were true she feared that she imagined this. It was true she didn´t love Inuyasha anymore, but not only because he had broken her heart so often. She didn´t love him anymore because this wonderful male that held her had captivated her heart.

"As I said, no one but you has been able to melt the ice around my heart." Smiling softly at her he kissed every single tear away. "I thought I would never feel this way again, but I do. No doubt I felt so much to you. That´s why I want to know everything about you. You are special for me, so strong, so beautiful, so independent... so you."

~~~

I wanna know your soul - I wanna lose control

c'mon n' let it out - I wanna know you inside out

ya gotta dig down deep - I wanna lose some sleep

I wanna scream and shout - I wanna know you inside out

tell me everything...

~~~

They shared another kiss, not caring if any of the others might see them. She looked in his eyes, these wonderful golden eyes and felt as if he  was letting her looking deep down in his soul. His normally cold exterior had melted and nothing was left except those warm, molten gold shining with love and hope.

He had lost all of his legendary control, all he wanted tonight was making her his. Knowing her deep down in her soul. So he poured all his long repressed feelings in his kisses. This night neither of them would sleep. This night was finally theirs. Tomorrow they would have each other, know each other, tomorrow they would know everything.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

A/N: It´s done and I hope you enjoyed it. Please read and review. Feedback is my fuel for writing. Thank you so much!