Complexity|| 複雑さ || Prologue
Kagome loved her friends. She really, really did, but there are some instances in life where they push her beyond her limits, passed her cheerful demeanour into something scarier and – for lack of better word – pissed. She did a good impression of an animalistic growl (more Canine than anything) as she stared at her companion with an expression simultaneously angry and hurt.
She was human, unlike some of her other companions, and pretty average looking. But unlike any average human in modern day society, her life was a lot more chaotic and unique. For about two years now she had been hopping through time, collecting shards of a jewel she hoped she could back to one piece, fighting demons, had her share of kidnappings, and in between all that she went to school whenever she could, although missing most of what could be a normal high school life. Although she lost that chance of a normal life once she had jumped the well at her home a second time, her connection to the past.
Her companion flinched slightly at her growl, the dog ears atop his head flattening against his skull, but stubbornly looked to the side and crossed his arms with a ‘Keh!’ refusing to acknowledge that she had gotten to him. Her other companions were keeping their distance from the argument that had escalated between the two of them, not sure whether or not they should intervene.
Kagome took a deep breath, trying to calm the mixed feelings of hurt and anger that stirred chaotically in her. “So that’s what you think of me, Inuyasha,” she said, her voice so low, but being a half demon he heard it as clearly as if she spoke to him normally. He also heard the pain and anguish in her voice. He fought hard not to flinch at the tone. “I’m nothing, but a shard detector to you?”
Inuyasha’s ears twitched at the slight tremor in her voice, which he wouldn’t have heard had he not been paying attention, but he refused to acknowledge it, because acknowledging it showed that, in fact, he cared. Acknowledging it would make him feel guiltier than he already was and acknowledging it showed he had a weakness when it came to her. “Feh! You knew that from the beginning, wench,” he said rather harshly, refusing to look at her in the eyes because he knew that if he did his resolve would crumble. He always hid, hid his true feelings away from everyone he cared about. He wasn’t willing to put himself in the same situation he had with Kikyou. It was just too painful. It didn’t matter if time said it was approximately fifty years ago, it was still too recent for him. The scars would always be there.
“It was your duty from the start,” he spat out, his demeanour not changing. He chanced a look at her face and had to forcefully stop himself from wincing at her look. “Don’t think it was any more or any less, Kagome.”
Ouch.
She knew he was being on the defensive, always hiding what he truly felt, but still…
Ouch.
Kagome flinched visibly at his words and her eyes turned glassy and her vision blurred, but she refused to let any tears fall. She would not cry in front of him. She just couldn’t believe it. She knew he thought of her as a friend. After all, how could you stay with someone for two years and not be their friend? He just refused to accept those feelings. After all they’ve been through, after all injuries and battles, he still couldn’t say it out loud.
Her lip wobbled as she tried so hard to regain her composure. She knew he could smell the unshed tears that blurred her vision, but she stubbornly still refused to let them fall, but it only took a little bit more time before her emotions got the better of her and her tears cascaded down her face leaving a glistening trail in their wake, glittering in the evening sun.
“Inuyasha, you idiot!” she yelled through her distress and did the thing she always did when Inuyasha upset her greatly, “Sit!”
He plunged to the ground and through the pain from the curse the beads around his neck gave him, he knew he deserved it. Always had, and that was something he wasn’t going to deny, even though he wouldn’t say it out loud. Even as the usual sting of curses and insults sprung from his mouth and even as she repeated the dreaded word, he knew he was an asshole and deserved the punishment he got from the curse around his neck.
In the background, her other companions looked at the half demon with something akin to disappointment as Kagome stormed off. The monk shook his head as his ‘cursed’ hand moved ever so slowly towards its target, the demon slayer looked at the direction Kagome had went in worry, the young fox demon shook his head and muttered ‘idiot’ under his breath and a small demon cat mewled and looked at the hanyou that called himself their leader disapprovingly.
A few seconds later a loud ‘thud’ was heard followed by a yell of ‘Pervert’ throughout the forest they settled in for the night.
-C-
Kagome hiccupped as she tried to calm her raging emotions that varied under ‘pissed off’, ‘hurt’ and ‘anguish’ while she sat by the river’s edge. She should be used to it by now. It was useless to cry every time this happened and she knew that. The routine was always there. Fight demons, find the shard, argue and rage off in a storm of hurt and tears. But every time they fought it was like a new wound was being opened inside of her.
She tried, she really did. Was it really her fault that she had grown up in modern society without the need to train to fight off demons? It wasn’t her fault that she was physically weak. She tried, practicing her miko powers, her aim with the bow, the bravery front she always put on while she was by his side fighting a demon ten times her size and fifteen times her strength…
But she knew that she was just making up excuses. If she really did try she would have given up school to train and gather some strength to fight off demons without needing Inuyasha’s help all the time. School shouldn’t really be an option anymore considering that she hardly ever went, but cling on it she did, her only semblance of a normal, modern teenage life that she had left. But she knew that her life stopped being normal the moment she jumped back into the well when she was fifteen.
She stared blankly into the stream; her tears had long dried out. A glinting of silver in the stream caught her eye and she blinked slowly as she stared at the opposite end of the torrent. She frowned, pausing in her thoughts as she slowly stood up and slowly walked across the stream using rocks, careful not to slip and fall. Maybe its a fish, she thought to herself as she walked carefully across the stream as small fish darted passed the rocks in the water.
Walking over to where she thought she saw the glint of silver she bent down and looked into the stream. She blinked as she saw a bracelet and reached into the water and picked it up. It was silver and very good quality considering it was the feudal era, and it looked fairly new as if someone just dropped it into the water recently. If you looked closely there was some kind of intricate design dancing across the small silver chain. She held it up, the sun making it shine a bit momentarily blinding her, hanging from the chains looked to be a rose made of ruby. In short, it was beautiful. Had she taken a closer look, she would have realised that it was also covered in a rather dark spell.
Definitely not a fish... she though absently.
As she stared at it, she wondered briefly that if she had left their small, odd group, would Inuyasha come after her? She pierced her lips in a straight line as she brought her hand down. Of course he would, after all, he needed his shard detector to give him the full jewel to turn him into a fully fledged demon, she had thought to herself rather bitterly. She sighed and placed the bracelet in her pocket as she sat down, looking at her reflection in the stream. She would look at the bracelet later, but for now she wanted to be left alone in her thoughts.
“Onee-san?” Kagome jumped slightly at a child’s voice that sounded slightly cautious and looked towards the small girl she had seen more often than not accompanied by Sesshoumaru. With this little fact, she was slightly on guard.
“Yes?” Kagome replied to the little girl – and if she remembered right – was named Rin, her voice a bit rough from crying. She tried to put on her best smile, but failed miserably. She just wasn’t in the mood. She felt miserable and wanted to strangle a certain half dog demon for making her feel this way.
Rin seemed to stand there as if pondering on what she was going to say next, her orange and white kimono a little dirty from, what Kagome assumed, was travel and playing around. She briefly wondered if she had any other clothing because she always saw the young girl in the same outfit.
“Is Onee-san okay?” she asked, “Rin heard crying noises before and found Onee-san a short while later.”
Kagome blinked and wondered how long Rin (at least the name was confirmed) was standing there watching her before she decided to speak up. She smiled slightly touched at the little girl’s concern even though they stood at opposite ends if she and her guardian fought each other. “I’m fine, young one,” she answered, her depression slowly going away as she talked to the girl, “Was a little upset, but I’m fine now.”
“Why was Onee-san upset?” Rin queried as she frowned a bit, “Did someone hurt you?”
Kagome bent down to the girl’s level and ruffled her hair. “Just a small falling out with a friend. It happens sometimes, but it’s all okay now.”
“Rin.” The cold voice froze Kagome in her place. She knew that voice anywhere and didn’t dare look behind her in fear that if she dared turn around the owner of the cold voice would kill her where she was.
Rin’s face, however, thought otherwise as she lit up brightly as she looked behind Kagome. “Sesshoumaru-sama!” she exclaimed, happily and Kagome watched the girl in wonder as she skipped brightly to her guardian. She briefly wondered how she could be so happy with one ever so stoic.
Kagome stood slowly and turned around, instantly on guard in sight of an enemy. He was beautiful, so breathtakingly beautiful Kagome thought that it must be a sin for a male to look like that. His mere presence demanded respect and attention and you’d be damned if you didn’t give it to him. He was perfect, yet deadly. “Sesshoumaru,” she said, voice measured carefully to not show the fear she actually felt, although she knew it would be kind of pointless in doing that since he could probably smell her fear from a mile away.
Sesshoumaru’s eyes narrowed at Kagome for her disrespect, but silently applauded her for not showing her fear, even though he could smell it. It wasn’t only fear he could smell and see. She held determination and she was determined to fight if they were a need. If he were another weaker-level demon wouldn’t have probably noticed her fear and probably back off with the look in her eyes, but unfortunately for her, he was one of the strongest out there. Personally, he had no qualms with the miko, but the fact that she was under his half brother’s protection immediately put her in his bad books.
Kagome and Sesshoumaru stared each other down and you could probably cut the tension between the two with a knife, but to the little girl, she felt none of it as she tugged on Sesshoumaru’s pant leg. Sesshoumaru broke eye contact to look down at his ward, who smiled toothily at him.
“Sesshoumaru-sama, Onee-san was upset, Rin saw her, but she’s fine now,” Kagome froze when she heard that and Sesshoumaru raised a brow and looked at Kagome, but didn’t say anything, but she knew, just knew, that he summed up that it was Inuyasha who had upset her. He looked back down at Rin, who continued in her speech, “She’s pretty, isn’t she? Rin doesn’t understand why her friend would want to upset her and Rin thinks Onee-san is very nice and kind.”
Sesshoumaru was quiet for a while. “Rin, you are supposed to be in camp with Jaken,” he said instead of answering her and Kagome thought he almost sounded like a father scolding his daughter. He briefly glanced at Kagome, and then said to Rin, “Come, the miko is fine now. It’s time to rest.”
And just like that, they were gone, Rin waving ‘goodbye’ with enthusiasm and following Sesshoumaru. Kagome let out a breath she didn’t know she was holding. Not even five minutes later, Sango, her demon exterminator friend, found her. “Kagome? Are you okay?” she queried, “And why are you on the opposite side of the stream?”
Kagome looked at Sango with a small smile. “I’m fine Sango,” she said running a hand through her hair a bit nervously. An action Sango caught, but didn’t say anything about. Kagome briefly wondered if she should mention the interaction with Sesshoumaru and Rin, but thought better of it. It was not worth mentioning if nothing hppened. “I just thought I saw something here,” she said not mentioning the bracelet, “It must’ve been my imagination.”
Sango smiled sadly at Kagome, knowing that she probably was still upset about what Inuyasha had said to her. “Come on, ‘Gome,” she said, “Inuyasha has been raving about wanting ramen for a while and you know what happened last time he tried making it himself.”
Oh, she remembered alright. It was a disaster last time he tried to make ramen on his own. She gave out an exasperated sigh, feeling a lot better than when she first arrived at the river’s edge. “And he says he doesn’t need me,” she said with a roll of her eyes and grinned lightly at her friend, “Okay, Sango! Lead the way!”
-C-
Sesshoumaru looked at slight distaste as Jaken apologised profusely at his feet for losing sight of Rin, who was at the moment, playing in a small field of flowers. Sick of hearing Jaken’s squawking voice, he spoke up, his deep, resonating voice instantly made the tiny demon quiet.
“You are to watch Rin. If this Sesshoumaru finds that you have lost Rin again…” He let the threat hang in the air for Jaken to fill it with his own imagination on what Sesshoumaru would do to him. Jaken turned slightly pale and began speaking reassurances in many forms of sentences before Sesshoumaru kicked him to shut him up. Noticing that he rendered Jaken unconscious, he opted to stay a little bit longer to watch over Rin before he went about his duties.
It was a few days later he caught the scent of his half brother’s pack, minutes later after catching the scent did he hear the unmistakable sound of shouting and only seconds later did her hear the familiar sound of something crashing onto the ground. He had no doubt that his half brother had indeed angered the miko… yet again.
It was no surprise that they had come near each other again, but he no doubt knew that they did not know he was nearby. After all, they were after a common enemy. They were bound to come across each other.
-C-
Kagome sighed as she stared at the stars that spread out on the sky like glitter on a velvet silk cloth. Everyone was asleep at this moment, except for her and Inuyasha, Inuyasha keeping watch for any dangers. But as usual he wasn’t at the camp site and the tugging of her soul gave her a good idea of where he might be or whom he was meeting.
She smiled bitterly. She wondered if he would ever tell her the truth of his night escapades instead of sneaking out to meet someone only alive with part of her soul.
Kagome leaned back, her back against the tree trunk as she played with the bracelet she had found earlier that week. She had not put it on yet. She looked up just in time to see a shooting star pass by and briefly remembered a time her mother told her to make a wish when she was younger and naïve to the dangers the world presented.
I wish…
Kagome looked at the bracelet in her hands, captivating as always every time her eyes fell upon the small trinket.
I wish…
Thoughts of Inuyasha ran by her head and where he was at the moment, the pulling of her soul, the sickened feeling she got whenever she was nearby. She didn’t hate Kikyou, for Kagome was sure while she had been actually alive and with a soul of her own she was probably a nice person. How else was she a miko? She was only the way she was now because she was brought back to life based on the feelings of pain, anger and betrayal.
Closing her eyes, she made her wish.
I wish… for a companion who would look at me and only me…
Opening her eyes she looked at the dying embers of the fire in the middle of the camp. She laughed bitterly in her head at her selfish wish she knew she was not allowed to make if she had the full jewel in her possession. She shook her head and let out a quiet sigh. Quietly, she stood up, making sure not to make noise to wake the others.
Picking up her weapon (She had learned to take her weapon everywhere after the random meet with Sesshoumaru and Rin – not that daily encounters with demons didn’t warrant any guard…) and running a hand through her hair she looked at which direction she should take, preferably away from the direction the tugging of her soul pointed to. She did not want to land herself near Kikyou and Inuyasha and in possibly an awkward position.
Walking away from the campsite, she listened to the quiet sounds that the forest at night time provided; the rustling of the leaves, soft sounds of nocturnal animals… She peered at the moon above as she paused by a tree in a small open area. It wasn’t a full moon, but almost. It glowed brightly as night time would allow.
She was suddenly struck by the thought of Sesshoumaru, the reminder the moon brought of the crescent shape on his forehead. Skin so pale, although making him look ethereal than sick, long silver hair that would make any woman jealous, the way he moved; precise and graceful. Something out of this world.
The killing perfection.
And that was something no one could really deny. He was perfect and was definitely deadly. One wrong move, you certainly wouldn’t be able to take another breath.
She shook her head furiously, wondering why on Earth she would be thinking of Inuyasha’s brother anyway. As she did that she was reminded of the bracelet as it jingled in her hand. Blinking, she wondered why she carried it with her everywhere, yet she had not put it on. Was something stopping her? Surely, it wouldn’t hurt right?
As she made the decision to put it on, she had completely forgotten that items were not to be trusted so easily in the feudal era. Take Inuyasha’s beads and the Shikon jewel, for example. You would certainly not expect a curse placed on either of them by simply looking at them. She learned that the hard way as excruciating pain made itself known throughout her body. Pain so unbearable, her mouth opened in a silent scream. She thought she would die.
Gradually, her body started to light up, then suddenly in a panel of strange light that shot at her from the sky covering every part of her body. Words echoed in her head through the hazy pain, words not easily forgotten once heard by the possessor of the bracelet.
Called upon this cursed state
Far too late to stop this fate
Twice a month shows what’s true
Love and warmth can break its cue
But never once a person must know
To get out of this cursed show
‘Cause should a person find out this
Your freedom is yours to miss
The light died down, and Kagome, unable to understand what had just happened, fell on to the ground with the bracelet as the only thing unscathed. She barely registered the set of footsteps coming her way.
She passed out.
AN: Yeah been working on this for a while (a long while). Besides this I have one other chapter done, but I want to update once a week. Schedule-like you could say. Well, I'll try to update once a week, at most twice, but I can't promise anything because way too often I get writer's block. ^^ It helps when people review and give their opinion! Rating might get higher in the future.
No one is beta'ing my work so forgive me if there are any mistakes.
Cheers
~StrawberryXThief